


When the Moon Hits Your Eye

by SimplySix



Category: Rise of the Guardians (2012)
Genre: Angst, Drama, Fluff, IMPLIED RAPE NON CON, LOVE THAT ISN'T QUITE HUMAN, M/M, Multi, Other, RITUAL RITES KIND OF THING, Romance, Self Loathing, TAKE BACK STORY, implied crossover - Freeform, suicidal things, traumatic event
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-10
Updated: 2016-03-25
Packaged: 2018-05-19 11:21:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 22
Words: 59,707
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5965462
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SimplySix/pseuds/SimplySix
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jamie Bennett may have grown up, but he never stopped believing.  For years after most kids stop seeing things like Guardians, Jamie continued to not only see them, but interact with them.  One Guardian in particular was always close by no matter where he was.  He'd promised Jamie that age did not matter.  Age would never affect belief. </p><p>But one, terrible event at the start of college puts Jamie in the middle of a downward spiral that no Guardian can save him from. . .not even the one that cared about him most.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Long Black Train

**Author's Note:**

> I desperately needed to get this out of my system. . .and I do not even know WHY.
> 
> I have never shipped it before, but apparently I ship the FUCK out of it. O.o
> 
> Enjoy,  
> Six.

_“No matter how old you get, you never have to give up on the belief that magic exists everywhere around you.  You never have to give the beauty of that light up to anyone.”_

………………………………………..

 

**_. . .next stops Galesburg, Rochester, Burgess. . .45 minutes. . ._ **

 

Disinterested, brown eyes looked away from the window for a moment before turning to look out at the quickly passing scenery.  His reflection was poignant in the glass.  It revealed short, shaggy brown hair and pale skin.  His face was smoothly chiseled and the frost creeping across the window framed the reflection protectively.

Jamie Bennett glared and turned away.

He hated coming home for winter break.

The young man in his 20’s opened one of his chemistry books and started studying what was going to be covered next semester.  He began to chew on the end of his pencil while he read aimlessly.

He wasn’t absorbing anything out of the book.  He was trying to ignore the frost covering the window and the snow glittering on the ground.  He could remember a time when he loved the snow and the winter.  It was his favourite season.  Those close to him knew why.

It meant he could see _him_.

Jamie glared at a chart of elements and molecules.

_I used to be able to see him._

It wasn’t the pain of growing up that had hurt him.  It was the pain of his best friend his entire life lying to him.  He had promised Jamie that age did not matter as long as one believed.  Jamie still believed.  Well, he had up until a year ago.

Jamie sighed and closed his textbook.  He put his head against the cool glass and closed his eyes.  He pressed himself as close as he could to the side of the train as it sped along.

There were things his family understood and things they didn’t.  There were things they accepted and things they didn’t.  When he had been in high school, he realised that he was attracted more to men than women.

He’d been able to keep it in check until he graduated; but college was completely different.

Jamie opened his eyes and stared into the darkness.

It had been his fault.  Why he had thought a Guardian with work of his own would save him was beyond him.  He supposed he felt that since he was the first one to ever see Jack Frost, he’d always be special.

“Just enough to get me mauled.” Jamie whispered scornfully.

His friends had talked him into going to a party during move in weekend.  He hadn’t planned on drinking at all.  Somehow, he ended up with a glass in his hand.  The next thing he knew he was being man-handled by two guys older than him.  His friends were nowhere in sight and he was too drunk to fend off the unwanted attention.

Even when he struggled and said ‘no’ they did not stop.

Jamie winced.

He went home that night feeling used and somewhat ashamed of everything.  He was ashamed that all he could think about was Jack and he was ashamed that he’d let his common sense run away from him. No amount of scrubbing, cold water or soap could make him feel better or less bitter about it.

He hadn’t told anyone; not even his family.

Jamie sat up straight and slowly put his books in the book bag between his feet on the floor.  He zipped it back up and returned his gaze to the window.

He knew they sensed he was different but they couldn’t figure out how.  It wasn’t their burden to bear and he was too embarrassed to tell them.  Besides, he hadn’t wanted them to do anything about it.

“I wanted Jack.”

Jamie’s voice was morose and soft. 

He stared out the window as the train began to slow and pulled into the station at Galesburg.  Snow was beginning to fall and it cast wonderful shadows and patterns in the calm night.  The lights made the snowflakes sparkle like ice.

Jamie resisted the urge to bring his fingertips to the glass to touch the frost.  He closed his eyes and pressed his forehead into the window and trembled.

It wasn’t just that he had been assaulted his freshman year that made him miserable.  Going home meant that his sister, Sophie, would be bouncing off the walls waiting for North and Jack to come around Burgess, his hometown.

He glared.

He supposed it was a bit of jealousy that made him bitter.  Last year when he had come home for Winter Break, he waited up with Sophie as he had every year after their battle with Pitch.  When North had come on Christmas Eve, Sophie had been ecstatic and bounded all over the living room.

Jamie hadn’t seen or heard anything.

After that, everything fell out from underneath him.  He felt as though the incident at college had somehow tarnished him and made him unworthy of believing anymore.  He supposed the whole, “innocence is gone” thing was applicable here.

It had been painful every holiday and break since.

In fact, he’d developed a rather nasty insomnia habit at school because of it.  When he did sleep, he tossed and turned in the darkness.  There was nothing.  No nightmares, no dreams, no nothing. It was just miles and miles of silent dark.

Jamie felt the train lurch forward and he sat up straight again.  He scanned the very few people left on the train before looking back at the bag between his feet.

He hadn’t wanted that to happen to him.  He still believed with all of his heart, but it was hard to keep your light bright when you felt unloved and unworthy.  Worse when your best friends were ones you couldn’t even see.

He reached into his coat pocket when his phone buzzed.  He looked at the text message and sighed softly.  His fingers moved over the screen while he typed a message back to his sister.

He didn’t need a ride from the train station.  It was only a few blocks from his family’s house. It wasn’t that cold, not that the cold even bothered him.

Because it didn’t.

It never had.

Jamie put his cell phone back in his pocket and turned back to the window.  He’d lost more weight.  His mother was sure to scold him for that.  His eyes had darker circles beneath them from lack of sleep.  His mother would probably notice that, too.

He sighed and put his face in his hands.

Why did _he_ have to be the one that had seen Jack Frost first?

 


	2. By Reasons of Deduction

“JAMIE!!!”

A short, blonde haired teenager leaped forward and bear hugged Jamie as soon as he came in through the front door.  Her eyes were bright and sparkling.  Her face was red from laughing and cooking in the kitchen with their mother. She did not wait for her brother to put anything down before bombarding him with questions about school.

“Easy, Sophie!  I am home for about three weeks, you know.” Jamie said sympathetically.

He removed his shoes and set his book bag by the door in the hall.  He smiled when he smelled his mother’s cooking and could hear his father singing Christmas Carols somewhere upstairs. He let his face feign the happiness when his mother came into the hall to greet him.

“Jamie! My goodness! What are they _feeding_ you at that school!?” she cried, lifting one of Jamie’s arms and looking at the tall, thin form standing in front of her.  “You are positively skin and bones!”

“I’m fine, Mom.” Jamie lied. “I participated in soccer this year, remember?  They have an indoor soccer field at school and I practised almost every day to help keep my mind clear for finals.”

He was grateful when his mother switched tracks and put her hands together happily.

“How did they go?” she asked.

Jamie smiled.

“I passed with flying colours is what most of my teachers told me.”

He put his arms around her and hugged her tightly when his mother congratulated him and hugged him close.  He set her back when she began talking about holiday plans and fattening him up before he went back for Spring Semester.

After she had returned to the kitchen, Sophie looked at her brother with an eyebrow raised.

“Jamie?”

“Yeah, Sophie?” Jamie asked, hanging up his coat.

“There’s something wrong, isn’t there?  Something you haven’t told Mom or Dad?”

Jamie turned and looked at his younger sister slowly.  His eyes were pensive when Sophie rocked back on her heels and stared at him through long, thick bangs that had always covered half of her face.  He could feel her searing straight through his façade and right to the heart of his bitterness and pain.

“No, Sophie.  Nothing’s wrong. . .just tired from finals. . .that’s all.”

Jamie moved to grab his book bag and take it upstairs to his room when Sophie stood in front of him. He sighed softly and looked at her, annoyed.

“C’mon, Sophie. . .if there was something wrong I would say something, wouldn’t I?”

“Right, like when you told me you could see North last year when you couldn’t.”

Jamie flinched.

His sister, though kind and gentle most days, knew his weakest points.  She loved her older brother dearly and defended him religiously.  She was so close to him that she could sense when something was off.

For the last year since Jamie had gone off to college, Sophie Bennett knew something was very, _very_ wrong with her loving brother.  Not just because he couldn’t see North when she knew he still believed, but because Jamie had never looked like a walking corpse in his life. 

Jack had never stayed away from Burgess and its children for this long.

North had sent Bunny in one direction of the world and asked Sandy to take the other half to find the spirit when he vanished off the Guardians’ radar.  When Bunny had stopped to see her, she told him that she hadn’t seen Jack since before Jamie left for college.

But he had to be around, right?  That’s why it was still snowing and sometimes an errant snowball would hit a kid in the face. . .wasn’t it?

Bunny had looked worried.  That instantly made _her_ worried.  If Bunny was worried about _Jack_ then something had happened.

By her own reasoning, the only thing that would have caused Jack Frost to disappear off the grid is her older brother, Jamie.

Sophie put herself between her brother and the staircase.

“Jamie. . .please tell me what’s going on.” she whispered.  “Something’s happened to Jack. . .after last winter. . .no one has seen him. . .”

Jamie’s eyebrows rose dramatically.

That was unlike the Winter Guardian.

Jack was drawn to children and enjoyed giving them the wonderful snow days they coveted.  He had enjoyed his job since accepting the position of becoming a Guardian.  To abandon it completely was out of his character.

Sophie winced.

“Bunny and Sandy searched _everywhere_ , Jamie.” she said quickly. “ _THEY_ haven’t seen him either.”

“None of them have seen him?”

Jamie closed his eyes and chastised himself.

He wasn’t supposed to care anymore.  Why was he engaging in this conversation?  He should push past her now before it went any further.

Sophie nodded slowly.

“North sent them when. . .when he did not come to the Pole for a meeting.” she answered. “He’s gone, Jamie!”

As much as it pained him to do so, Jamie set his jaw and shook his head determinedly.

“I haven’t seen him, either.” he said stubbornly, pushing Sophie out of the way carefully. “I haven’t seen him since the winter I graduated.  I can’t help you.”

“Jamie!!”

Jamie sighed and looked at his sister when Sophie grabbed his free hand and tugged violently on it.  He stopped on the third or fourth step and looked at her.  Her eyes were watering.  They were always so big and bright.  They had always been that way.

It was hard to deny her with those eyes.

“Don’t you understand what this means?” Sophie said painfully.

Jamie shook his head.

“I told you, I haven’t seen him.”

“That’s the POINT!”

Sophie glared up at Jamie and shook her head.

“Don’t you remember?” she whispered. “You were the first child to ever see him. . .I’ve talked to North about this kind of thing. . .I know you still believe in Jack, Jamie.  Nothing could convince you otherwise.

“North says that sometimes, a traumatic event can trigger the same actions as growing out of believing in magic!  I know you well enough that I can say you would NEVER stop believing. . . unless something horrible had happened.”

Sophie looked down for a moment before looking up at him.

“So, please, Jamie. . .help me, help you by telling me what’s been going on!? What happened last year!?”

“Jamie, my boy!”

Jamie had never been more grateful for a distraction in all of his life.  He pulled his hand free from his sister’s and turned when his father called down from the top of the stairs.  He gave his Old Man a hug and explained the same things he had to their mother to him. 

They shared a laugh or two, went over scientific stuff Sophie did not care about and caught up before their Dad let Jamie continue up to his room.

Sophie crossed her arms and glared up the staircase.

“What’s wrong, pumpkin?  You look like someone soured your egg nog!”

Her father ruffled the hair on the top of her head as he came down the rest of the steps.

“Nothing, Dad. . .I just, was hoping to talk to Jamie more.”

“Oh, well, he’s had a long trip home from school.” her father replied jovially. “Give him some time to settle in and I am sure he’ll be more open to talking.”

Sophie watched her father go toward the kitchen whistling.  She waited until the door to the kitchen swung shut before looking back up the stairs ominously.

It was true that North had explained that even if one believed, regardless of age, that belief could become clouded or “overshadowed” by other emotions.  He had explained that anger, jealousy, pain and trauma were a few things that overrode even the strongest faiths at times.

He’d said he’d seen children with hearts so full of sadness and guilt that there was no light, only darkness and silence.  Their hearts neither shined nor sang with the music of the seasons.  They existed.

When she had asked if it was permanent, she remembered North stroking his long beard and thinking hard about it.  When he’d answered, she wasn’t sure how to interpret it.

He said he guessed it was possible, because anything was possible!  But he said that if the believer could not come to terms with their other feelings or beliefs about what was going on in their lives, they would never get their light to shine through it.  The dark fog would always cloud it.  Unless the issue was dealt with, it would be hopeless to try. 

Sophie put her head against the banister and winced.  Her heart ached.  She wished she could see Bunny.

Her fingers touched an ornately painted charm that was on a necklace around her neck.  It had been a present from Bunny one Easter.  He had really worked hard on it, too.  The detail was amazing.  It was an egg, sure, but Sophie loved and treasured it so much she never took it off.

Over time, she began to notice that when she felt extremely lonely, sad or upset and held the charm, she would feel better again.  Sometimes, when it was _really_ bad, like the time she ended up in the hospital with the appendicitis, Bunny would come personally to reassure her.

“It must be so painful for Jamie.” she murmured softly.  “He knows. . .when he comes home. . . that I can see and he can’t. . .that must. . .be. . .so hard.”

Tears actually came to her eyes when she thought about not believing in Bunny.  She clutched the charm in her hand and shook her head.  She couldn’t fathom it.  Just thinking about it hurt so badly she wanted to go to the Warren right now.

Sophie sniffled and wiped her tears away with her free hand.  She trembled and closed her eyes.  She knew that her brother and Jack Frost had a special relationship.  Jamie had been Jack’s first.

North had laughed and told her a Guardian never forgets their first child or believer.

The first believer always held a very, _very_ special place in the Guardian’s heart, he said.

That’s how she knew something must have happened to her brother while he was away.  She already knew that he was homosexual.  She’d found that out when Jamie was a Freshman in high school.  She was happy that her brother was honest with his feelings and she supported him.

This was different. 

This was something more sinister.

Sophie sighed and dragged herself away from the stairs when her mother called her from the kitchen.  She looked up the stairs longingly before finally returning to her previous task.

From the shadows of the upstairs hallway, Jamie fell back against one of the closet doors.  His chest felt tight and his eyes were starting to water.  He put his face in his hands and trembled.

_I don’t think I can take anymore._

 


	3. Missing

“Still nothing!? This is unheard of. . .UNPRECIDENTED!”

Several elves dropped the items in their hands when a loud, booming voice made the workshop tremble.  Several Yetis kept the icicles from falling from the ceiling as their boss thundered around the command room.  They frowned but said nothing.

The Guardian of Christmas was in a particularly foul mood for it being so close to his time of the year.  His efforts to find the missing Winter Guardian were not turning up results.  While he had thought it was the boy’s way of being stubborn at first, he was beginning to realise that it was something much worse.

North turned and slammed his hand down on a console.  A map highlighting all of the believers in the world was silently spinning in the middle of the room in front of him.  His normally jolly eyes were narrow with anger.  His beard was thinner from pulling at it so much in the past months.  He’d even lost weight which no one thought was possible.

“Where could he be!?” the Guardian asked, quieter. “Why has he run away!?”

He crossed his arms and closed his eyes.

An unsettling feeling rushed over him while moonlight fell through a skylight above.  The ice sparkled and the Guardian circle looked regal under the milky white.  Its newest carving, one North had been quite proud to make, was lit up but very dim.

“How can he be doing his job, but hiding all the same?” North asked aloud.  “Jack is stubborn and rash, but this. . .this is. . .”

The Guardian stopped when he remembered the younger Bennett asking about believers that suddenly could not see even though they still believed.  He uncrossed his arms as he recalled what he told her.

“Perhaps. . .there was. . .accident. . .something terrible. . .”

North turned to face the spot where Jack Frost stood in the Guardian circle.  The darkness moving over the blue ice-light was making his heart ache.  The symbol was beginning to frost over the longer the darkness held.

The Guardian slowly looked up at the Moon almost accusingly.

He shook his finger up at the ceiling.

“You took him!  Gave him this. . .this mission. . .and he did it without complaint! He put up with. . .with being OUTCAST. . .and now his _first_ is what you take!?  Does your cruelty know no bounds, Man!?”

The Moon continued to shine brightly.  It did not respond and it did not change in the sky.  The light fell across the circle peacefully.

North sighed and dropped his arm.

It was pointless.

The Man in the Moon would not speak unless he was inclined.

“Boy meant everything to Jack.” North murmured. “He. . .could see. . .well into adulthood.  To suddenly not be able to see when boy still believes. . .no. . .this is something worse. . .something deeper.”

The Guardian frowned again and tried to think.

He was far too busy to be going out.  He knew this because every time he tried half a dozen elves and Yetis would restrain him from going off in the sleigh.  Tooth had her own problems and Sandy was always moving about.

North looked up, startled.

He quickly moved over to the symbol opposite his own and put his hand down on it.  It lit up a beautiful golden yellow while light filled the lines.  North stepped away when swirls of sand came together to form the weathered, jovial form of his fellow Guardian, the Sandman.

Sandy shook out his hair and turned his head sideways to knock several bits of sand out of his ear.  He looked at North curiously.  He smiled.

“I’m sorry to bother, Sandy.” North said apologetically.

Sandy waved his hand dismissively.  He knew as well as the other Guardians that Jack had been missing for some time.  When he had visited Sophie in her dreaming state, he could tell that it was troubling her terribly.

“Has boy Bennett been dreaming lately?”

Sandy was surprised by North’s question.  He looked at the taller Guardian curiously.  He acted out that he wasn’t quite sure what North meant.

“Have you been able to connect to Jamie in his dream like his younger sister.” North tried again.

Sandy startled and looked down at the floor for a moment.  He thought back carefully.

When was the last time he had been able to visit Jamie Bennett?

The older spirit thought very, very hard.  He was getting something from the past, something dark and terrifying.  He had believed Jamie asleep, but he was between sleep and waking. . .he was. . .

North uncrossed his arms again when Sandy began avidly waving his arms and directing his sand in various patterns in front of him.  He watched with a growing frown.  His white brows came down on his eyes sharply.

“. . .twilight sleep?  You say you could see him, but not influence his dream?  When was this!?”

Sandy indicated that it had been last year.

North looked down before looking back to his comrade.

“Sandy, do you know what you saw?”

The Sandman frowned and looked away sadly.  He watched Jack’s symbol completely frost over and begin to ice.  His sand drooped a little around him.  He turned back to North and half-heartedly directed the particles.

“Saying ‘no?’” North asked confused. “He was saying he did not want something?”

Sandy nodded.

“But he was half asleep?”

Sandy nodded again.

“Well, by MiM’s ghost I’d say he was like me after a particularly rough Christmas. . .”

North stopped suddenly.

Sandy winced.

That would explain why Jack was missing.  Jack hadn’t been able to stop it.  He hadn’t been there to protect Jamie.  Jamie felt horrible for letting something out of his control happen, and Jack felt horrible for allowing it to happen.

“What is world coming to, Sandy?”

The Sandman looked up at North as the taller spirit hung his head.  He tried to pat North’s shoulder comfortingly.  He mimicked several other actions.

North shook his head.

“Jamie cannot see us because he feels that this is his fault.” he said softly. “He feels that his light is somehow tarnished. . .he is. . .undeserving.  He was supposed to be for Jack and Jack alone. . .”

Sandy looked at North curiously as the Christmas Spirit turned away with a heavy sigh.  He followed North to the console in front of the world map.  He signaled that he did not understand.

North was quiet for some time before answering.

“Jamie Bennett. . .was first child to ever. . .ever see Jack Frost. . .just as he was. . .for what he was.  This is special privilege for any Guardian.  I still remember my first.  For Jack, that moment was the start of his life.  He felt ALIVE.”

The spirit smiled faintly.

“Jamie grew with Jack.  You cannot tell me that you did not see that love forming between them, Old Man?”

Sandy chortled silently and nodded.  He directed his sand in another direction.

North nodded.

“That’s right.  There is no other person Jack would sacrifice anything for in whole world.” he said gently.  “That is why it is so important we find him quickly.”

Sandy shook his head.

“The longer Jack remains away from Jamie. . .the longer Jamie holds on to this guilt. . .the more likely it will be that Jamie will extinguish his light all together.”

Sandy suddenly looked alarmed.  He started directing his sand around frantically.  He looked at North when the Guardian sighed heavily.

“It is not so easy, friend.” North answered softly.  “This is indeed a pain that could shadow a light.  It may be so great a pain to Jamie that Jack cannot see _him_.”

Sandy was at a loss for words _or_ actions.  He stared at North dumbfounded.

North stroked his beard slowly and closed his eyes.

“It is rare. . .far rarer now than it used to be. . .but it makes sense with Jamie and Jack.  Jamie was a First. . .his light was undying. . .to maintain such bright light. . .can be daunting, yes? In such cases where the Guardian is so connected to a child or believer. . .it can work in reverse.”

North finally faced Sandy and shook his head.

“The Guardian loses sight of the believer.  Believer just disappears. . .”

“That would explain why the piker up and left, then, wouldn’t it?”

North and Sandy turned when a rough, heavily accented voice spoke out from behind them.  A brilliant green light spread out across the floor as the Spring Symbol lit up and a rather large rabbit with long ears hopped up into view.

The dark eyes were serious and whiskers twitched nervously.

“Bunny! This is surprise!” North said curiously. “What brings you so far North?”

“Sophie, actually.” the rabbit answered, standing on two legs and walking toward him and Sandy. “Jamie is home, and she is practically devastated by something I can’t see, mate.  That charm I gave her is burnin’ a new plot in my garden.”

North frowned and looked at Sandy as the oldest spirit shook his head and gestured frantically again.

Bunny tilted his head and waited until North interpreted.

“Dreams for Sophie. . .but none for Jamie. . .” North murmured. “. . .Jamie is not sleeping. . .”

Sandy, alarmed that someone could avoid him, looked at North confused.

“It isn’t just this traumatic event.” North answered. “It is his entire mind, body and spirit.  They are all slowly dying on him.”

Bunny was startled now.

“You mean, the kid’s. . .dyin’?”

He spoke the words fearfully.

North’s face was grim when he nodded.

“To be separated from his closest friend. . .without realizing how or why. . .that pain is probably worst pain of all. DAMMIT!”

Bunny and Sandy jumped back when North slammed his palm down on the console.  They watched, pensively, while North bowed his head.  Even the buzz of the workshop fell silent.

“I should have done something last year. . .” North breathed hatefully. “. . .the minute I realise boy could not see me. . .I remember. . .even then. . .he was disappearing. . .fading from _ME_.”

“Come to think of it. . .I didn’t feel Jamie at home either. . .” Bunny admitted sheepishly.

“He does not want just any Guardian.” North said with a sad smile. “He wants _his_ Guardian.”

“That doesn’t explain what _Jack_ up and left!” Bunny argued. “Where the hell is _he_!?”

“He does not understand either.” North answered. “He believes Jamie stopped believing in him. What would you do if Sophie stopped believing in _you_?”

Bunny lifted a finger and pointed it at the Christmas Spirit.

“That isn’t funny, mate.” he said seriously.

“Then you know why Jack is missing.” North answered. “He is hurt. . .he does not understand.  He has no way of knowing.  Only one who could tell him anything is either boy or Sandy.”

This caused the slumbering spirit to startle awake and look at North excitedly.  He waved his hands and directed his sand.

North watched and lowered his hand from his beard when he started to see what Sandy was trying to say.

“If we could find Jack. . .tell him what is blocking Jamie’s light?  It is long shot, my friend, but it may work. . .it may at least allow him to _see_ boy again.”

“Jamie hasn’t stopped believin’, remember?” Bunny asked heatedly. “You said that some emotions can block out a believer’s light, right?”

North nodded.

“So, if we could get Jack to come back. . .get him to understand. . .if Jamie is as close as we all believe, then no matter what he felt, he would see the runt, right?” Bunny continued.

For the first time in a very long time North’s eyes sparkled with a bit of hope.  He smiled slowly and looked at Bunny with a slow nod.

“Da, my friend.” he breathed. “That just might work.”

“Then we need to focus on finding Jack.” Bunny said stomping on the ground twice with his foot. 

A hole opened beneath him as he turned to North and Sandy.

“Sophie knows something isn’t right. . .she is only doin’ what she can because she loves her brother. . .but it may push the kid over the edge.  We need to hurry.”

North took Bunny’s advisement seriously and nodded.

“Have we checked _everywhere_?”

“I keep going back to that wretched pond every day.” Bunny answered with a grimace. “He isn’t there, or if he is, he is damn good at hiding.”

North shook his head.

“No. . .no you of all spirits would see Jack Frost.” he replied smiling half-heartedly. “No one hides better than the Easter Bunny, after all.”

This remark struck Sandy strangely.

The Sandman slowly turned and looked up through the skylight.  The moon merrily sent its light down into the Guardian circle.  He squinted up at the great being they knew only as Man in the Moon.

If Sandy were to be honest, he knew much more about him than that, but he liked things simple for simplicity’s sake.  However, times were desperate, and there was a human life at stake.  Worse, it was a _First_ human life.

He would have to make a trip.

If Jack Frost was not anywhere on Earth, there was only one other place he could be hiding.

There was only one other person that _could_ hide him.

“I’ll check in with Sophie.  I’ll have her keep an eye on her brother for us.  Since none of us can see him, we should probably be on high alert.  If something happens to him before we find Jack, we are going to have a bigger problem.”

Sandy shook his head when Bunny spoke again.  He looked up at North and then to Bunny.  He nodded enthusiastically and motioned he would do the same.

“Answer her when she calls, Bunnymund.” North said seriously. “Even if it is for small thing. . . we cannot risk another human life due to our involvement.”

Bunny winced but nodded.

“Don’t worry.” he answered. “Nothin’s gonna happen to my Peace Lily.”

Without another word, the spirit disappeared into the hole he had created.

North smiled faintly.

“Bunny has become quite smitten with the young lady, hasn’t he, Sandy?”

Sandy laughed silently and nodded.

“Peace Lily may as well be Lily of the Valley at this point.” North sighed. “A great honour to Bennett family.  But one happy ending to a tragedy is not success.”

Sandy put his hands together.

The last time he had seen Jack was right after Jamie had left for college.  The Winter Guardian looked exuberant as ever.  His eyes were bright and he held himself proud.

From what he had heard from Bunny and North, Jack did not look remotely like himself anymore.

The Sandman frowned and closed his eyes.

That is how they lost Pitch.  That is how Pitch _became_ Pitch.  A Guardian does not simply become as evil as Pitch was.  They are transformed slowly and painfully.  The happiness and good is drained from them until there is nothing left but darkness and emptiness.  The loneliness consumes the bright light and extinguishes it.

If he could not get Jack Frost back and make him understand in time, they would lose him to this darker, evil side of Guardianship.  There must be equal balance on all sides. Light and Dark must not fall out of balance either.  It was the oldest fight Sandy had been privy to in all his years.

Sandy glared and looked up at the Moon again.

He would not let Jack become someone’s pawn or evil puppet.  He would not let that bright light and wonderful smile be taken away.  Jack had the benefit of his First being young and devoted to him. Amazing, magical things happened when Firsts and their Guardians forged a relationship like Jamie and Jack had done.

He wasn’t about to let another spirit or Guardian interfere with that happiness.

Sandy gestured to North that he was going to search as well.  North thanked him and tried to focus on the upcoming holiday.  He watched Sandy disappear in a swirl of sand.

The Christmas Spirit watched as Jack Frost’s symbol iced over and cracked clear through to the stone.  He put a large hand over his face to hide the tears.

They were running out of time.

 


	4. Lost

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have to admit that I have a special soft spot for a reader that tags along no matter what I seem to write about.
> 
> Diredevil has been KUDOS-ing my work for quite some time and for that little bit of acknowledgement, it really brightens my day. I have been out of work for a month from a surgery I had to remove a mass from my ovary. No cancer, but lots of bad endometriosis and a horrific scar because everyone THOUGHT it was cancer. It's put me through a lot of pain and left half of my lower pelvis numb. Not a pleasant start to my New Year.
> 
> So, a most sincere bow to you, Dire. You have certainly made this old girl's day.
> 
> I appreciate all my readers, but I must say, you are one of the best I have ever had. 
> 
> Thank you.
> 
> Yours, Always,  
> Six.
> 
> P.S. I think according to Fanfiction Writer's Code of Ethics, this entitles you to a work of your choice. . .pending I know the fandom and can do it correctly. x)

“What classes are you taking next semester, dear?”

Jamie looked up from his half eaten dinner plate when his mother started picking up everyone else’s empty plates.  He had been lost in thought.

_When am I NOT lost in thought anymore._

“I am taking advanced Calculus and Bio-Chemistry.” he answered almost mechanically. “They are honours courses, so I hope I do well.”

“I am sure you will, son!” his father said with a warm smile. “You are quick as a whip.”

Sophie sat staring at her brother with daggers coming out of her eyes.  She’d done this most of dinner as neither of their parents seemed to think Jamie’s behaviour was abnormal.  She frowned and crossed her arms.

“Do you have a girlfriend yet?”

Jamie glared at her before setting his silverware on his plate.

“I don’t have time for one.” he replied stoically. “Thank you very much for dinner, Mom. It was wonderful.”

“You hardly ate anything, Jamie!” his mother answered worriedly. “Are you feeling all right?”

 _Finally_. Sophie thought.

Jamie smiled and nodded.

“Finals were exhausting and I put in a lot of time at cram school.  I wanted to make sure I did as best as I could to make these honours classes next semester.  I guess I would like to sleep more than I want to eat.”

He was grateful when his mother accepted this answer without further interrogation.  She kissed the side of his face and he quickly said his “good nights” to everyone before leaving the kitchen.  He took the stairs two at a time to stay ahead of Sophie and entered his room.

When the door was shut and locked behind him, Jamie breathed a small sigh of relief and bowed his head.  His hair fell across his face and over his eyes.  Every part of him was aching.

He managed to pull himself toward his desk.

His room had not changed too much since he was a kid.  The décor had been updated and his parents had bought him a futon couch that unfolded into a bed when he was 13.  He had two bookshelves crammed in beside his dresser that were overflowing with science and chemistry books.  The walls were covered with tables and charts from every scientific and mathematic discipline.

Jamie turned on his desk lamp and collapsed into the chair.  He sat there for a moment before picking up a pencil whose end had been chewed off.  He opened one of the many notebooks lying about and turned to an empty page.

His hand was moving before he realised it.

It followed the curves of his neck and shoulders.  It traveled down his sides and over long limbs thrown against a wooden crook.  The pencil was silent while the lead filled in long, slender shins and bare feet.  Shades of grey and black were splashed against a worn hoodie and pants.

Eyes, brighter than ice, stared up at him while a smile that could melt the winter snow appeared under that.  Strands of soft, white hair brushed against the face he could not get out of his head.

Tears started to fall to the page while Jamie worked.  When he had finished the drawing of Jack, he started to draw frost designs.  After they had met, Jack had taught him how to make frost, well, frost!  He’d gotten pretty good at it over the years.  They used to play a game to see whose was better.

Halfway through a swirled design behind the Winter Guardian the pencil stopped and slipped from Jamie’s hand.  More tears slid down his face as he set his head on his arms.

He had never imagined that he would stop believing.

Jamie angrily sat up and corrected himself.

He _still_ believed!  He would _always_ believe!  He would always believe in Jack Frost especially.

“I’m just not worthy anymore.” he murmured looking out the window as snow began to fall heavier outside. “If he knew what had happened. . .he’d probably think I was as irresponsible as I think I am. . .he’d be disgusted. . .hate me.”

This made Jamie feel worse.

He angrily pushed himself away from his desk causing several pencils to tip over in a plastic pencil holder.  He stood up and threw himself onto the futon.  After a few moments he got back to his feet and threw open the window.

Snow, cold and sharp, hit his face and arms.  It got caught in his hair and in his eyelashes.  His temperature began to drop while the wind blew snow into the room.

“I never stopped believing in you, Jack.” he breathed into the night air.  “I could never forget you!  I would never abandon you!”

Jamie’s tears frosted to his cheeks.  He winced terribly before shaking violently.

“But if you KNEW!  If you knew what had happened. . .I’d lose your love. . .and that would be the worst thing of all, Jack.  I couldn’t take it!  I’d rather never see you again than you find out about that and lose your love.

“I’M SORRY!”

The sounds of sobs muffled against a windowsill faintly echoed through the room and the closed, bedroom door.  On the other side, Sophie held the necklace charm in her hand and listened silently.  Her eyes were pensive beneath her bangs.

Whatever had happened to her brother it had hurt him terribly.  If she had to make a wild, educated guess based on what she had heard, she would say that Jamie had been hurt. . .or had something done to him against his will.  She thought this only because he mentioned Jack’s love.

She knew well enough that her brother held Jack Frost in the highest regard.  In return, Jack held Jamie in highest favour.  Sophie figured it was because he had been the first kid to ever see him.  That meant so much to Jack that he’d never forgotten it.  Jamie meant more to him than just a “believer.”

“Who am I kidding?” she whispered. “I saw the two of them snogging one another down by the pond one Christmas Eve.” 

It was what Jamie had wanted for Christmas that year.  She remembered Jamie asking North about it being all embarrassed and ridiculous while the Christmas Spirit had laughed heartily.  

Sophie winced.

To be fair, she had never seen a sight more beautiful than the two of them kissing under the moonlight in the snow.  They were invested in one another.  Anyone who stopped to observe them could see that their dedication went much farther than belief.

They loved one another.

“Peace Lily.”

Sophie started and looked across the hall.  She watched her door crack open slightly and the dark, shadowy form of her own, favourite Guardian hiding behind the wood.  She quickly made her way over to her room and shut the door behind her.

“Bunnymund!” she said, clearly surprised. “What are you doing here!?”

Bunny smiled at her.

“Came to admit defeat.”

Sophie smiled faintly.

“Something _did_ happen to him, didn’t it?”

Bunny nodded carefully.

“But you don’t know what yet, right?”

He nodded again.

“What do you need me to do?”

Sophie was startled when Bunny pulled her into his arms and held her tightly.  She could hear his heart beating faster than usual.  This made her afraid and she wrenched her neck to look up at him.

“Bunnymund. . .”

“You know how much I appreciate you don’tcha, Peace Lily?”

Bunny’s voice was uncharacteristically soft.

Sophie tilted her head and smiled.

“Of course I do.” she murmured. “Just as much as I appreciate you humouring me for being a baby.”

“Yer nothin’ of the sort.” Bunny said fiercely.  “I just. . .don’t think I say it enough.”

Sophie smiled and buried her face in the fur of Bunny’s chest.  She wrapped her arms around him and held him tightly.  She understood what Pitch’s evil had taken from the Guardian.  She knew that he suffered in different ways.  She had her own special relationship that began when she was a very little girl.

“Bunnymund, you’re getting soft on me!” she said playfully. “Just promise me we are going to do everything we can to save my brother. . .promise me it will be okay!”

Bunny held her tighter and nodded.

“I promise.”

It was a tall order to make.  He could not guarantee that they would find Jack before Jamie did something drastic.  Given that none of the Guardians could see him he was in great danger.

Bunny quickly set Sophie back and held her hands in his paws.

“Peace Lily, you have to keep an eye on your brother.” he said seriously.  “We think. . .we think that whatever happened to him caused a kind of chain reaction.”

Sophie looked confused.

“What do you mean?”

“Whatever happened made Jamie feel unworthy of being Jack Frost’s First.” Bunny answered. “This feeling of guilt and pain is literally blocking his light and consuming it.  Even though he believes, we think that the damage is so severe Jack can no longer see _Jamie_.”

Sophie was startled now.

“How. . .how is that even possible!?” she cried softly.  “I thought only believers eventually lost sight of GUARDIANS, not the other way around!”

“Usually that is true.” Bunny admitted. “But Jamie’s relationship with Jack is different. . .you know that, love.”

Sophie winced.

“Just like I thought.” she breathed.

“What?”

“I was listening to Jamie just now.” Sophie answered distantly. “He kept saying if Jack knew what had happened to him he would lose Jack’s love. . .he’d rather stop believing and never see Jack again than lose his love. . .but he started sobbing, Bunnymund. He was SOBBING.

“He still believes with everything he has, but I think someone must have hurt him or taken advantage of him. . .and he feels so guilty and unworthy that whatever _you’re_ talking about happened.

“Jack cannot see Jamie. . .because Jamie doesn’t _want him to see._ ”

Bunny looked at Sophie, shocked, before holding her close again.

“We will find Jack, Peace Lily.” he said with more conviction. “I swear it.  Just keep your brother safe.  We cannot see or feel him.  It is up to you, love.”

Sophie smiled.

“Does that mean I get an extra special Easter next year?”

Bunny grinned back at her.

“When haven’t I brought you a banger Easter?” he responded.

Sophie closed her eyes when his nose nuzzled hers.  She smiled again and nodded.

“I will try to keep tabs on Jamie, but he is avoiding me like the plague.  If I lose track of him I will let you know immediately.”

Bunny smiled.

“Thanks, love.”

Sophie nodded.

“Find Jack, Bunny. . .I know he wrecked a few Easter Sundays, but he deserves this one. . .Jamie deserves this one.”

“Don’t worry, Peace Lily.” Bunny answered, tapping his foot on the floor. “I won’t stop until the brat is back to throwin’ snowballs at the back of my head.”

He kissed Sophie’s forehead before disappearing into the hole he had created.

Sophie looked up and out the window when the wind blew fiercely against it.  She winced when frost angrily covered the window panes in ugly, jagged paths.

_This is so unfair. . .if anyone deserves a Guardian lover. . .it’s. . .Jamie!  He’s the one who held onto his belief when the entire world had given up!_

She clasped her hands to her chest and trembled.

“Please. . .whatever happened. . .please protect my brother. . .do not let it eat away at his soul and good heart!  Do not let Jack give up on something so beautiful. . .let him hear me when I say he didn’t stop believing!  He didn’t stop believing, Jack!

“He loves you!

“HE LOVES YOU!”

 


	5. Confrontation on the Moon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case you haven't picked up on this by now, I'm not going with the Guardian of Fun thing here. . .because. . .I guess I didn't fully "buy" it?
> 
> I mean, I GET IT, but I didn't BUY it. You make it fucking snow and you cause my car to careen into a ditch when there is black ice. That shit ain't fun! You the fuckin' Guardian of Winter, son!
> 
> So, before I get any complaints in that department, I figured I should clear that up. . .because any one who tells me that is North's territory is delusional. Christmas is a pain in the ass enough, isn't it?
> 
> Six appreciates your understanding. ;)
> 
> Yours,  
> Six.

_. . .he loves you. . ._

Cloudy, ice blue eyes looked up at the vast, marble ceiling above as a voice echoed through the intricately decorated arches and domes.  They moved listlessly in skin that was more of a grey colour than white and under bangs that were slowly turning a darker grey.

Jack Frost looked back at the small map that the Man in the Moon had given him so he could continue his responsibilities as the Guardian of Winter.  He aimlessly tossed more snow over Burgess and the surrounding areas with his staff.

The crook was frozen solid and there were jagged, sharp icicles hanging from it.  The wood was fading beneath frost and snow.  The hand that held the item was thin and the same, grey colour as the rest of him.

In fact, there was not a part of Jack Frost that was _not_ turning grey.  Even his clothes were losing their bright hue.

Jack did not move when he heard Moon return from wherever it was he had gone.  He sat by the world map staring into nothing.  He did not return Moon’s greeting when the being entered the hall where Jack had not moved in almost a year.

“Still moping I see?”

The tall, graceful figure of the Man in the Moon was escorted into the room by starlight and cloud trails.  Dust drifted from the long, white hair to the floor.  His eyes were clear like quartz. If one were so inclined, they would think he was blind.

Moon’s robes moved about his long legs as he drifted over to where Jack was sitting and took a look at the map.

“You have the others in a panic now, you know.” he said softly. “I daresay I will have a visitor shortly.”

Jack frowned and pulled the hoodie over his head.

Moon sighed and turned away.

He already understood this was the Guardian’s way of saying “go away.”

The bright, enameled pendant of a crescent moon shimmered in the light of the inner hall.  It was pinned to the being’s robes.  His skin was almost as white as that of Jack’s when the Guardian was healthier.

Moon looked down at a small, round table that housed a fantastic collection of crystal quartz and minerals.  The jagged peaks rose and formed in random patterns while the light cast rainbows in all directions.  His lips turned down in a frown when he closed his eyes.

His meeting with Selene had gone well.  One of her priestesses was about to go on a life changing journey to Earth.  It was most exciting.

Moon looked back at Jack and sighed again.

“I cannot condone this behaviour much longer.” he murmured. “Or else we will have another Pitch on our hands.”

The crystals on the table shifted and the light changed.

Moon watched them and shook his head.

“That would not work in this situation.” he answered softly. “It is quite fantastic this situation, actually.”

The crystals moved again.  The light changed to a solid colour when dark, black smoke moved through the nooks and crannies of the jagged bases.

“No. I will not lose another one.” Moon answered stubbornly. 

He turned back to look at Jack sitting beside the map.

“When a Guardian’s heart is broken it is hard to overcome.” he whispered. “Sometimes one never recovers. . .like Pitch.  But _unlike_ Pitch, Jack is not bitter, jealous and angry.

“He’s hurt.  There is a difference you know.”

The smoke cleared and the crystals became a bright, rosy pink.  They shifted into a shape that resembled a bright, blooming lotus flower.

“She will be expending enough energy sending her priestesses to the future of Earth.”  Moon answered absent-mindedly. “I could not ask her to spare more for our problem.”

The crystals tried again.  This time they became a deep, dark indigo.  The jagged peaks fell into what appeared to be a sea of quartz.

Moon put his fingers to his lips.

“It is too risky. . .the boy. . .”

The crystals insisted.  The light became more intense and the waves of quartz crashed against their taller, mountainous peaks.  The table shook gently.

Moon closed his eyes.

“That is horribly cruel, you know.” he murmured. “He thought me terrible enough when I unceremoniously gave him the responsibility to begin with. . .I doubt he would take _this_ suggestion well at all.”

The being watched the crystals carefully form the plan in front of him.  It played out through his head in its entirety.  He waited until the argument was finished before speaking again.

A long, wispy sigh filled the entire hall.

“That much suffering for a happy ending?  I might say that is a bit much myself.  One or the other is likely to lose their lives.”

Moon hesitated and watched the crystals continue to swirl.

“The Sea of Serenity is volatile this time of year.  With Selene already stirring things up on the surface it may not be wise to add to the disaster in the making.”

The crystals violently shifted back to their clear, jagged forms and let the smoke fill the table.  The crystals became dark, black and sinister.  Their light was completely depleted.

Moon winced.

“But there must be equality.  You cannot have one without the other!  If I do as you ask, I must take another! And you do not want me to take just _any other_.”

This time, there was no response.

The space entity sighed and watched the black continue to get darker.  He could see it trail to the floor and drift toward Jack ominously.

“Knock that off!”

Jack turned his head slowly when Moon’s voice changed from its calm, quiet to a very sharp, violent tone.  He looked at the table of crystals that was glowering behind the spirit.  It didn’t take a genius to figure out what _that_ omen meant.

He turned and looked at the map in front of him.  Again, he heard a soft, desperate voice echo in the eaves above.  He lifted his face and studied the ceiling.

Where was that coming from?

Why did it sound familiar?

“Jack?”

“A voice.” Jack answered, not bothering to look at Moon. “Can’t you hear a girl’s voice?”

The Guardian’s voice was hoarse from disuse.  The words were croaked rather than spoken.  He continued to search the arches while Moon joined him.

“I hear nothing.” Moon answered honestly.  “Do you hear a voice?”

Jack hesitated before looking away.

“Maybe I am going crazy.” he muttered glumly.

“No, I don’t think that you could get much crazier than you are already, Jack.” Moon said good-naturedly, sitting down beside the Guardian. “What does this voice say to you?”

Jack stared at the map for a long time before looking at Moon, hurt.

“It says ‘ _he loves you_.’ over and over.” he whispered.

Moon was startled.  He tilted his head, his quartz, cat-like eyes studying his favourite Guardian closely.  He thought for a moment before answering.

“That is significant, that.” he answered seriously.

Before he could go any further, the sound of someone entering the center of the Moon where he resided echoed down through the main hall.  As he was apt to do when anyone came to him, Jack turned away and huddled into the hoodie he’d been given.

Moon rose to his feet in anticipation of his visitor.  His face was not pleasant when golden trails of sand whisked across the floor.  The tiny granules caught him around his feet and clung to Jack protectively.

It even caused Jack to turn around.  His blue eyes changed to a shade bluer when the Sandman entered the Hall in a great flurry. The smile Moon had not seen in months slowly spread across the Guardian’s face.

“Hey, Sandy.”

Sandman stood at his full height and glared at Moon accusingly.  He crossed his arms and continued to glower even as the spirit moved toward him.

Moon sighed, aggravated, when a wall of sand stopped him from coming any closer.

“You are not being fair, love!” he called aloud.  “I did not force him here.  He came here and stayed of his own will.  I took pity on him and gave him a place to hide and continue his work.  You cannot blame me for having a soft spot for my favourite.”

Jack looked at Moon, surprised.

“I’m. . .your favourite?”

“Of course you are.” Moon said, smiling gently, eyes shimmering like opals. “When I gave you the responsibility of Winter Guardian, it was because I saw something in you I saw in no one else on Earth. . .the other Guardians included.  That remains true today.”

Jack’s surprise remained on his face while Sandy dropped the wall of sand and furrowed his brow.  There was a long pause before the Guardian lowered his arms and returned his gaze to Moon.

“You. Are keeping the TRUTH. . .FROM HIM.”

Moon could not stop the Guardian before the words tumbled from his lips most audibly and loud.  He winced when Jack made a noise behind him.

“Unfair, Sandy.” he murmured. “I know you are much older than I am, but I thought we had agreed that silence was indeed golden?”

The deep, booming syllables from before were still echoing while Sandman gestured with his hand.

“I will speak when I feel it is necessary!” the Guardian answered angrily. “That was always the arrangement, Moon.  I agreed to stay silent when you chose Jack and I agreed to keeping an eye on him when you made him a Guardian.

“I will not allow you to let him become what Pitch became after so long in this same state.”

Jack felt horrifically lost.  He was still trying to come to grips with Moon’s statement about him being his favourite.  But the fact that Sandy could always speak was blowing his mind. Now, at the mention of Pitch’s name, he frowned.

“What do you mean?”

Moon looked down at Jack when the Winter Guardian stood up ominously.  Snowflakes drifted down from the staff and skirted around the marble floor.  He sighed.

“Sandy, balance!  There must always be _balance_.”

“You left your brother to darkness and he became exactly what you wanted.” Sandy sneered almost hatefully.  “Equality my golden ass.  Pitch had no choice!  _YOU_ did!”

“I do not meddle in the affairs of Earth unless I must, Sandy.” Moon said firmly. “My brother’s actions led to his downfall and he subsequently drew the wrath of the Earth Guardians.  The war he raged upon Bunnymund was felt throughout the cosmos.

“Even when I wanted to interfere then, I was not able!  Don’t you think I wish I had a priest or priestess to act in my stead!?  It is difficult managing the Guardians from so far away; but I do the best with what I have.”

Jack felt dizzy and sick all at once.  He had a sudden wish to be very, very far away right now.  The feeling in his gut only got worse as the argument escalated.

“You selected _Jack_ for that purpose, Moon.” Sandy hissed vehemently. “That is why he is the Guardian of _WINTER_.  It is when the NIGHT is felt the LONGEST on EARTH!”

Each word was a stab in Moon’s chest.  He winced each time.  He looked down at the floor before bringing his hand to his chest.

“But I did not cause his demise.” he whispered painfully. “I did not. . . _kill_ an innocent boy or a whole species to get what I needed.  What I found in Jack he had already.  If anything, I saved him.  I gave him a chance to share that wonderful gift with _every_ child on Earth.

“If Pitch could not understand what purpose he served, then it was his own fault.  I tried to assist him, Sandy, I did.  Nightmares are not anything anyone wants, but they must HAPPEN.  They are LIFE LESSONS all children MUST LEARN.

“He became bitter, jealous and angry and his power became completely corrupted.  Once he had unleashed on Bunnymund’s homeland I could not support him any longer.  It was my responsibility as the leader of the Guardians to protect my Spring Guardian and punish the offender.

“I HAD NO CHOICE.”

“Are you saying you have no choice now?” Sandy asked heatedly. “Why are you not trying to heal the rift that has formed between Jack and his First?  YOU KNOW WHAT IT IS, MOON!”

Sand shot out in all directions while Sandy fumed.  The golden dust became a dark, yellow colour while the spirit stepped closer to Moon and thrust his finger in his chest.

“You saw just as much as I did that night.”

Jack shook his head, heart painfully beating in his chest.  He slowly pushed the hoodie away from his head and looked at Sandy.

“My First. . .do you know what happened. . .why I cannot see Jamie anymore!?”

Sandy glared at Moon and crossed his arms when Moon pleaded with him.

“My dearest Guardian, please do not do this!” Moon begged softly. “Do not do it!  It will not make the situation better. . .only worse!  You will only bring what I have seen come to pass!”

Sandy turned and looked at the table on the far end of the hall in the Room of Dreams.  He frowned when the crystals shifted back into the indigo sea with black smoke trailing over it. He paused before turning back to Moon.

“I deserve to KNOW!” Jack argued loudly.  “If you KNEW, why didn’t YOU tell me, Moon!?”

Moon winced and looked down at Jack.  He shook his head miserably.

“If I had told you, you would have only become angry and hateful.  In your current state, it was too dangerous.  Hate and anger lead to dark thoughts and feelings.  That darkness leads to dark actions.  Eventually, it consumes you and you end up hurting what you were destined to protect.”

“I would _never_ hurt Jamie!” Jack hissed angrily.

“But you might hurt the ones that injured Jamie, no?”

Jack’s anger deflated like an old balloon.  He looked at Moon, forlorn.  He couldn’t argue with him about that.  After all he and Jamie had been through, he could not honestly say he could be okay with someone hurting his First and letting them get away with it.

“You just said there are some lessons that children MUST learn, didn’t you, Moon?” Sandy asked softly.  “Now is one of those times.  You cannot protect him any longer.  Whatever has come to pass will pass and what is to come can change as easily as the sand at the tide.

“You cannot shield Jack from the darkness in the world.  You tried to do that once and your brother almost killed him.”

Moon did not respond.

Tears, sparkling and dusty fell from his eyes when he closed them.  The translucent colour became milky and clouded when he finally looked at the other Guardian again.

Sandy put his hands in front of his chest.

“There is evil in the world, Moon.  Even if Jamie believes until the day he dies, he will still have to deal with that evil and darkness.  He will have to face hate and persecution.  He will have to experience feelings that make him feel like he does now.

“By keeping Jack from understanding the same feelings, you cripple him.  You separate him from that which keeps him whole.  You make the pain worse, Moon.  You are killing them both.”

Moon winced and put one of his hands against his forehead.

There was so much turbulence on the Moon today.

“I want to know. . .why I cannot see Jamie, Moon.”

Moon lowered his hand and looked down at Jack when the Guardian held his staff close and stared up at him with his eyes bluer than they had been in a very long time.  He winced, his heart aching miserably, before looking down at the floor.

It was so very rare for Guardians like Jack Frost to come along.  When Moon had the chance to assign Jack to the task of Winter Guardian, he knew it was the right choice.  Even if he had remained silent for three centuries, it had paid off when it needed to pay off.

Guardians like Jack were special in another way, too.  They weren’t seen and heard by just _any_ or _every_ child or believer.  It took a strong heart, a brilliant light and a certain type of soul to see them and continue to believe past childhood.

When Jack had finally become visible, Moon knew that he would be faced with a challenge like this someday.  Jamie Bennett was not just any normal child, either.  He had a particularly strong belief and spirit.  He had a strong will, too.  That made the situation even worse.

Being Jack’s First put him at risk for attack from other Guardians or Spirits across the galaxy.  He was so special Moon gathered that _none_ of his Guardians really understood the implications. Well, _almost_ none of his Guardians.

“You told me _humans_ don’t see _me_ when they stop believing.” Jack said as calmly as he could. “But I can no longer see _Jamie_.  I. . .I. . .”

Jack floundered for a moment before grasping his staff tightly in his one hand and putting his other hand over his heart.

“I love him!  Jamie is _mine_.  If something has happened to him, I deserve to KNOW about it!”

Sandy smiled faintly.  He nodded encouragingly when Moon looked up, startled.

Moon's eyes were dull with tears, but through them he stared at Jack seriously.

“What did you say?”

Jack growled in frustration.

“You NEVER LISTEN TO ME!” he bellowed almost angrily. “You’ve never listened to me until about a YEAR AGO!”

“Humour him, Jack.” Sandy whispered gently.

Jack looked at Sandy before turning his gaze back to Moon.

“I said I loved him, Moon.  I love Jamie.  I love everything about him!  He. . .he is my heart, my soul and my everything!  You cannot tell me you and the others did not SEE that!?  He is my First and he belongs to _me_.

“I will not give him up without a fight. . .and it will be a fight to the death, Moon.”

Moon pondered this carefully before looking down.

“Even if we told you, Jack, it doesn’t mean that Jamie would be visible to you again.” he murmured painfully.

“Why not!?” Jack asked indignantly.

“Because Jamie’s belief and his light are not being clouded by a Guardian or Spirit.” Moon answered, sighing.

“Then. . .why!?” Jack asked.

“Because _Jamie_ doesn’t _want_ you to see him.”

This statement struck Jack hard.  You could hear the breath of wind leave his lungs and echo through the hall.  The Winter Guardian’s face was in a paralysed state of shock and fear. It was a few minutes before Jack’s eyes narrowed and tears formed in his eyes and turned to frost on his cheeks.

“Because. . .he doesn’t. . . _want me_. . .to see him?”

Moon glowered at Sandy before carefully setting his hands on Jack’s shoulders.

“Jack, listen to me.  All hope is not lost.  Anything is possible if there is one left to believe in it.  One left to fight for it.  Even when it seems hopeless, one can make a difference.”

He gently tilted Jack’s chin up so the Guardian was looking at him.

“You may be one person to the world. . .but you may mean the world to one person.”

Jack trembled.

He could not imagine any kind of scenario that would make Jamie hide from him.  He couldn’t fathom any nightmare or horrible vision to make this make any sense.  He loved Jamie.  He was _this close_ to making it official.

He’d learned from Bunny and North that it was perfectly acceptable a couple of years ago when Bunny became smitten with Sophie.  He’d asked if there were rules against a Guardian taking on a priest if they were male.  When North humoured him and asked him why, he’d been honest.

He had wanted to ask Jamie last year. . .but. . .he’d disappeared. . .gone.

“What if _he_ means the world to _me_ , Moon?”

Jack’s voice was downcast.

“That’s why I am afraid to show you what happened.” Moon answered.  “Because he means so much to you, it may push you to do something terrible.”

“Why don’t you leave that decision to me, Moon?”

Jack looked up at his superior and shook his head.

“I am _his_ Guardian.  You remember how terrible I felt when you found me last winter.”

Moon did remember.

Jack Frost was never one to miss a snow day or winter storm.  When one was scheduled to hit the area where Jamie lived, the temperatures actually rose and nothing happened. Absolutely nothing.  It had brought the ire of the other Guardians, but it had worried Moon immensely.

He’d searched for Jack and could not find him for some time.  That is what had terrified him at first.  Jack was not visible anymore.  If Moon could not see him, then the Guardian of Winter was in significant danger.

After several days of frantic searching, Moon had felt Jack’s presence in the woods near the pond where he had started his Guardianship.  He’d actually come _down_ to Earth to find him.  When he had, the Guardian was curled in a ten foot snow drift that had an ice cave frozen solid beneath it.

The darkness had been clinging to him like it had another. . .

Moon could not risk any other option.  Jack would only escape North’s watch and he could not trust the other Guardians not to get frustrated with him.  He had taken Jack back to the Moon and kept him there the whole time. 

Guardians could not feel anything off their own planet.  It was a blessing, really.  If all of the spirits and Guardians in the cosmos could feel and hear one another all of the time, no one would get any peace.  By bringing Jack with him, he was able to stall this inevitability.

Now, Moon could see that he could stall no longer.

“Jack, if Sandy and I show you what we know, you will be left with only bits and pieces of the story.” Moon whispered painfully. “We have to go to another to see the full extent of why Jamie has blocked himself away from you.”

Sandy nodded in agreement.

“He was between sleep and waking when I saw him, Jack.” the Guardian said gently. “What I saw is not enough to tell you the whole story.”

“Then who can?” Jack asked painfully.

“Jamie has not been sleeping for some time since the incident.” Sandy murmured. “When he does sleep, it is usually a darkness I cannot penetrate.  But. . .every so often. . .when his mind is completely exhausted and he collapses from stress. . .he has the nightmare again.”

Jack trembled and shook his head.

“No.”

Moon nodded.

“I am afraid the only one who knows the whole story is my brother, Jack.” he said softly. “Pitch is the only one that can show you what happened that caused Jamie’s light to dim.”

“Good fucking luck!” Jack cried angrily. “Why would Pitch do ANYTHING to help me or YOU?”

“Because he is bound to do so.” Moon answered simply. “Sandy guards the dreams of children when they are pleasant and warm.  Remember, I mentioned there must be balance, Jack.  There cannot be _good_ dreams without _bad_ dreams.”

Jack fumed for a moment before letting his face ease back.  He looked up at Moon carefully.

“Didn’t we. . .banish Pitch?”

Moon nodded.

“You sent him back to where he belongs.  He is locked up for all time, bound to his responsibility for managing the nightmares and bad dreams of the world.  The only reason he became as powerful as he did is because he allowed himself to become bitter and jealous.

“He wanted more than was his.”

Jack held his staff closer and looked down at the floor.

He had tried to barricade himself from feeling the pain anymore.  Being with Moon had helped significantly because he did not have to deal with any of the other Guardians.  To be honest, he was surprised Sandy even thought to look here.

But he would be lying if he said he did not ache to know what he had done or what had happened to cause such a violent change in his First.  It had been a fierce blow to his heart when he could not see Jamie.  He’d searched. . .for weeks. . .until he’d collapsed in a warmer part of the world.

Bunny actually found him and brought him back to the Pole to recover.

He would hate himself more if he didn’t get the answer, even if it _was_ coming from Pitch.

“I have to know, Moon.” he whispered.

He looked up at the spirit, tears glittering in his eyes again.  He shook his head and reached up to touch Moon’s hand.

“I would. . .hate myself even more. . .if. . .I did not find out.  I owe it to Jamie to find out what happened and re-assure him that NOTHING could make me hate him or change my opinion of how I feel about him.”

Moon smiled faintly, now.  He slowly brushed the bangs out of Jack’s eyes.  They were back to their bright, icy blue.  This made him feel much calmer about the events to come no matter what order in which they happened.

“Okay, Jack.” Moon answered softly.  “Sandy and I will take you to the Other World to see Pitch. If that is truly your desire.”

Jack nodded.

“It is.”

Sandy nodded.

“You heard Sophie earlier, Jack.” he said gently.

Jack looked at him.

“What?”

“The voice.” Sandy breathed, closing his eyes. “The voice you thought was a girl’s?  It was.  It was Sophie’s prayer to you.  She was praying on Jamie’s behalf.”

Jack’s eyes widened to the size of silver dollars.

Of COURSE. . .SOPHIE.

Why the hell hadn’t he thought of THAT?

He smiled, almost relieved, when Sandy smiled back at him.

“So, I’m not crazy?”

Sandy shook his head.

“No more than Moon or myself.” he replied.

Jack let the moment of relief wash over him.  Even if he could not see Jamie, Sophie could see him.  Sophie could tell him if Jamie was all right.  He had been selfish, only thinking about how he felt. If he’d been thinking straight, he could have asked Bunny to speak to Sophie so much earlier.

This suffering didn’t have to happen at all.

“Take me to Pitch.” he breathed. “I need to know what this nightmare is. . .no matter what. . .so I can dispel any notion that it effects the way I feel about Jamie.”

Moon nodded.

“Come with me.”

Moon drifted ahead and down the hall.  Sandy and Jack followed closely behind him.  Everyone was quiet as they moved into another room that was much darker than the others.  In this room there was a mirror that was black as onyx.

Jack took a steady breath and smiled at Sandy.

“Thanks. . .for coming to find me.”

Sandy smiled back.

“It is true, what I said, Jack.” he answered.  “There is something special about you. . .and while Moon wishes to protect and shield you from the evils of this universe. . .it would only cripple your ability to continue to love the one you’ve chosen.”

Sandy made a small noise when Jack hugged him.  He smiled and nodded.

Jack leaned back and grinned.

“Maybe. . .strike up a conversation with me once and awhile, okay?”

Sandy touched the side of his nose and nodded.

Moon looked back at Jack and Sandy pensively.

“You ready?”

Jack felt more of his old self returning as snow fell off of his staff.  The icicles began to melt away from the crook when he nodded.

“Yeah.”

“Away we go!”

 


	6. Forsaken

By the time Jamie woke up the next morning it was almost noon.  He had nightmares all night.  If he slept he hadn’t slept well at all.

His eyes were swollen from crying and his throat and sinuses hurt.  He’d left the window open all night allowing the snow to drift in as it wanted.  He had curled up under the blankets and let the cold seep into his bones.

It was the closest he could get to the one he truly loved anymore.

“Jamie! Geez! Are you just gonna SLEEP ALL DAY!?”

Jamie did not answer when Sophie pounded on his door and spoke irritably through the wood.  He remained curled up in his bed staring at the wall.  He had no desire to get up and do anything at the present moment.  If he had half an inkling he would say he’d like to stay in the sub-zero room until he caught pneumonia.

“Jamie. . .it’s the eve of the Solstice!”

Sophie’s voice was softer.

This did not improve Jamie’s mood and he picked up the item closest to his bed and threw it at his door.  Unfortunately it had been a rather large book and it made a horrific sound when it struck the wood and landed on the floor.

“LEAVE ME ALONE, SOPHIE!  I AM TIRED!  I DON’T CARE WHAT FUCKING DAY IT IS!”

Jamie was lying.  He cared more than anyone.  This meant that Jack was at his strongest.  His power tripled on the Solstice.  He’d learned that over the years they had been together.  The amazing things they did together around this time of year were becoming faded memories as the bitterness of the past crept up on him.

He was grateful when his mother yelled at Sophie from downstairs and told her to leave him alone and stop pounding on doors.  He heard her footsteps shuffle away from his room. He felt awful for treating his younger sister so horribly.  It wasn’t _her_ fault he felt this way.

If anything, she was only trying to help.

“But she still _has_ her Guardian.” Jamie said hoarsely.

His voice was incredibly bitter.

“Mine won’t ever want me again.”

This caused him more distress and he curled further under the blankets.  He hadn’t worn anything to bed.  At this point, he had convinced himself he wanted to be sick.  He wanted to be so sick he could not move or speak or do anything.

At least if he was ill he might develop a fever.  A fever would bring him the darkness he wished for desperately.  It was the dark void of anything.  A void in the middle of nowhere.  A place where he was entirely alone.

Tears started to course their way down his cheeks again.

Whenever he’d been sick as a kid, Jack had come to his aid.  The Guardian helped break the fevers and watch over him.  It never failed.  All Jamie had to do was beg for him and there he was.

Now, in the darkest of times, he couldn’t even muster the courage to ask for help from anyone.  It made him feel pathetic.  His heartache worsened.

Jamie threw the blankets off of his body and stood up.  He walked over to where his book shelves were and silently pulled a book from one of them.  He slowly opened the cover to reveal the book was hollow on the inside. 

There were various things in here that Jamie did not want his parents or Sophie finding.  They spanned a decade of time spent with someone he loved with everything he had.  His eyes drifted over the objects until he found a small, velvet bag at the bottom.

He slowly took the blue bag from the book and closed it.  The book went back into the shelf and Jamie returned to bed under the covers.  His fingers slowly opened the strings and felt for what was inside.

A beautiful, silver chain with an exquisitely crafted snowflake charm fell out into his palm.

Jamie’s brown eyes narrowed when the bag fell to the sheets and both hands took the charm between them.  His fingers were trembling. The circular, sapphire stone in the center sparkled in the sunlight coming in through his window.

He’d signed up for a metallurgy class his senior year of high school just to make this for Jack.  He wanted to give the Guardian something special. . .something he’d made himself.  He’d worked and slaved the entire year to finish it alongside his other class projects. His teacher had given him an “A” as extra credit for his efforts on it.

It was his intention to give it to Jack last year at the Solstice.  When he did not go to the pond and Jack did not come to him, Jamie had thrown it where he threw everything else.  He’d thought about getting rid of it when he couldn’t see North either, but he didn’t.

Staring at it now made him feel a pain like no other.

His heart and soul had gone into this for someone he cared for deeply.  Now, that person was gone.  He’d never see them again.

The silver chain dangled over Jamie’s hand when he put his palms against his face to stifle a sob.

It wasn’t fair.

He’d grown enough to know that the world and life weren’t always fair, but this was torture.  To have what he’d cherished his whole life taken away was something akin to having his heart cut out of him while he was still breathing. There was a growing pressure on his chest that would not lift.  If something did not break soon, Jamie was sure it would kill him.

 Jamie held the charm to his heart and curled into a tight ball.  He felt snowflakes settle in his hair as the wind blew them in from the window.  This made him cry harder.

“How much more can I take before I fall apart?”

His voice was soft and muffled into his pillow.  He stared at the wall wearily.

“How bad will the pain get before it ends?”

Jamie lifted the charm and stared at it.  The silver shimmered.  He could see his distorted reflection in the shine. He winced.

“Maybe I am going about this all wrong.” he said softly.

He turned his head and looked at the ceiling.

“Why wait for it to end?” he asked no one.  “I have the power to end it myself.”

Jamie had thought of that earlier, but couldn’t bring himself to do it.  But the longer the separation lasted, the longer the darkness filled his heart and soul, the easier the notion became. Now, with the Solstice right around the corner, Jack would be back to where he became a Guardian.

“And I can end my life as a human.”

Jamie’s voice was not his own.  It was hollow and lifeless.  His eyes were distant and his skin pale.  A blush filled his cheeks even though he did not feel hot or cold. 

Hearing the words aloud now did not sound so ridiculous.  The idea did not seem so impossible anymore.  He was in so much pain he didn’t _care_ anymore.

He could hear Sophie laughing with the other kids outside.  He listened for a few moments, wondering if he could do that to his family and his friends.  What would they say?  How would they react?

He knew how Sophie would react.

Jamie closed his eyes and held the charm tighter.

“It’s my life.” he breathed. “I can do what I want with it.”

He knew exactly what he would do, too.  He’d thought about it for awhile now.  He knew that the ice tended to be thin in places at Jack’s pond.  Even though he was an amazing swimmer and the cold did not disarm him like others, he knew he could resist the urge to fight if he stayed in the cold water long enough.

Jamie felt a pang of guilt.

That was how Jack lost his life in the first place.  That wasn’t exactly a nice way to repay someone that had made your life worth living.

“I don’t care.”

Jamie turned over on his side again and trembled.

“I don’t care anymore.” he breathed painfully. “I just want it all to go away!  I want the pain to stop!  I can’t do it anymore!  I can’t take this guilt or wash away that horrible night!”

Tears slid down the bridge of his nose.

“If I were dead. . .it would stop.” he whispered. “It would all stop and I would not feel anything anymore.”

Jamie knew that Sophie would surely be at the pond for the day of the Solstice.  She’d stop him or get help.  But, it was a far walk from their house to the pond.  By the time she got anyone to help, he’d be beyond saving.

But, if he went with her. . .like he used to do. . .perhaps it would be better.  She wouldn’t suspect anything and he’d be gone before she could try and talk him down.

That was just as cruel as what he was doing to Jack.

“It doesn’t matter what road I take.” he mused. “I hurt the people I love in the end anyway.”

Jamie held the charm so tight that it pierced the skin of his palms.  Ruby red stained the bright silver while he wept.  As it slid down the beautifully crafted piece, a spark he could not feel or see shot up into the air like a firework and exploded.

From halfway around the world, there were two Guardians that noticed it immediately.

 


	7. Running Out of Time

North turned away from the map and several toys he was repairing when he saw the dangerous, red flare burst into flames above the Guardian circle.  His eyebrows rose.  It had been a long time since he had seen that warning.

It meant that a priest or priestess’ death was imminent.

Before the Guardian could do much more than turn around, Bunny leapt up from his symbol and bounded over to him.

“Did you SEE IT?”

“Da. I saw.” North answered gravely. “But I have no idea what it could mean. . .you still haven’t selected your priestess and we know Jack hadn’t.  No one else has one right now.  I don’t understand how it could have happened.”

Bunny frowned.

“The kid!” he argued. “It has to be the kid!  If he feels so awful he is _blocking_ Jack then why wouldn’t he be beyond takin’ his own life!?”

North was immediately worried.

“Suicide? No. I cannot believe that.”

“You better start gettin’ with the program, mate.” Bunny said dangerously. “I saw Sophie last night and she told me he looks awful.  He’s lost all of his weight, his eyes are dark and he refuses to talk to anyone about what is goin’ on.  He was cryin’ for Jack last night.

“If he still cannot see him, then the only thing it could be is that he is thinkin’ about offing himself.”

North turned around to the map in a desperate bid to locate Sandy.  He was startled when he could not feel the Guardian’s presence on Earth.

“Where the hell could he have gone?”

“Who!?”

“Sandy.  He isn’t on Earth anymore.”

Bunny took his turn to be surprised.

He looked up at the map with North.

“How’s that possible?”

North shrugged and stared at the glittering lights strewn across the world.

“Sandy is much older than any of us, yes?  He may have a lot more to him than we do, too.”

“But, where the hell would he have gone!?” Bunny asked again.

North shook his head.

“I believe Sandy may know Man in Moon personally.  It is thought I have had for some time now.”

Bunny frowned before his face cleared.

“That’s why we can’t find Jack.” he moaned.

North looked at him.

“Man in the Moon must have taken him to the Moon.” Bunny answered softly. “Guardians can’t feel anything off their own planets.  No Guardian can. . .but Moon and Jack don’t necessarily have the typical Guardian relationship, do they?”

North shook his head.

“No, they don’t.”

North’s brow furrowed as he worked through the thoughts in his head.  He looked down at Bunny.

“I need you to stay beside your ward, Bunnymund.  She is going to be the only one that can help us.  If that signal is what you think it is, then either Jamie or Jack is in grave danger.”

“Jack, too?” Bunny asked. “How?”

“Guardians have hearts that can break, too.” North said softly. “If Jamie dies, Jack will die.  He wouldn’t want to go on.  It is just the stubbornness in him.  If Jack died, the same thing goes.”

He sighed as he threw his tools down.

“What could have happened to him to make him want to do such a thing!?”

“Maybe that’s why Jack left in the first place.” Bunny offered.  “Maybe he went directly to the source for answers since he couldn’t. . .well, go to the _actual_ source.”

North shook his head.

“One doesn’t just _go_ to the Moon, Bunny.” he stated simply. “It takes quite a bit of practise and you have to know the way.  Jack is too young.  He wouldn’t know how.  But, if he were _taken_ from Earth and _brought_ to the Moon that is different.”

“Are you suggestin’ that the Man in the Moon came down here _personally_ and picked him UP?” Bunny asked incredulously.

“That’s my hunch.” North sighed. “It would certainly explain why we haven’t seen him in over a year and he has continued his work without fail.  Moon gave us the map.  He’d be able to procure one for Jack as well.”

Bunny ran his paws over his ears several times before nervously looking up at North again.

“Even if I’m there, North, I cannot help!  What am I supposed to do!?”

“All we can.” North answered. “Sophie is our link to Jamie.  There must have been something very important about him that we missed.  Not just that he is Jack Frost’s First or priest, but something much, much different.  It is more complicated.”

“How in the hell could it be more complicated than it is already!?” Bunny argued.

North stroked his beard while he thought.  His face was red from consternation.  He waved his finger.

“It has not happened in my lifetime. . .but there is legend. . .Sandy may know it.  It is said that if a human is so dedicated to a Guardian they would sacrifice their life for them, the human becomes similar to that Guardian themselves.  But the circumstances are so strict it is rarely seen or done.

“But, as we now know, Jack is not just a normal Guardian and Jamie Bennett is not just a normal human.”

Bunny digested this before looking at North.

“We can’t let the kid kill himself.” he said softly. “It would devastate his entire family. . .it would crush Jack!”

“That is just it.” North said looking back at Bunny. “This blocking out shouldn’t be happening.  Whatever transpired has caused Jamie so much pain his light is tarnished. . .blocked. . .the guilt is what is causing this.  His heart is in so much pain that he cannot connect to the good in it anymore.

“To block Jack. . .who is acting directly from the orders of Man in Moon. . .no. . .no normal human could do that.  Which is why I believe we have made a grave mistake about Jack Frost and Jamie Bennett.”

North shook his head.

“You have to return.  Stay with Sophie and make sure she does not lose track of her brother.  We have to be on the alert for all contingencies.  The Winter Solstice is tomorrow.  Jack has no choice but to return to Earth for that time.

“Our only chance to repair this damage will be during that day.”

Bunny nervously moved about on his feet.  He shook his head in return.

“North, I can’t handle this by myself.  This is somethin’ I don’t even understand let alone could handle alone!”

“Which is why elves going to be very upset.”

North turned to the nearest worker and called them over.  He told them to prepare his sleigh and under no circumstances was anyone to stop him or he would simply run them over.  Two Yetis rolled their eyes and went off with the elf entrusted with the order.

The Guardian turned back to Bunny.

“Go.  The minute Jack is back on Earth, we need to know where Jamie is at.”

Bunny nodded and tapped the ground with his foot.

After he had disappeared, North turned and looked up at the Moon shining in the sky.  He frowned and felt a dismal, aching feeling flood through him.  This happened when a Guardian took in new information about the human world.

When a Guardian became a Guardian, they took what knowledge of the world they inhabited from the life they led before.  In Jack’s case, he couldn’t remember the world before he was Jack Frost.  It had taken years for him to remember.  Even then, he hadn’t been old enough to learn everything about the world.

“A dark lesson to be learned, for sure.” North murmured. “To what purpose, hmm?”

The Guardian stared at Jack’s symbol in the circle and noticed that it was beginning to shine brighter despite having been shattered.  He weighed the options carefully and determined there was no other course.  If this was what the Man in the Moon had in store, then he could only facilitate and run damage control.

“Not that I like it!” he bellowed.  “IS THAT SLEIGH READY YET!?”

As the Guardian thundered down a staircase toward the stables, a bright beam of light fell upon the symbol of the Winter Guardian and silently rearranged the broken pieces.  A new symbol was formed out of the existing lines and the colour became an intense indigo.

A gold moon crescent appeared above it before the moonbeam disappeared.

_That is all I ask, my Guardians.  That is all I ask._

 


	8. Nightmares and Truth

The air was acrid and dark.  Shadows moved in the wild expanse like bats.  Stone structures and damaged wire scattered the land of Nightmares.  All kinds of creatures bounded across invisible terrain when Moon led the trio through the black glass.

Moon’s light cast a glow around them as they walked.  It lit the way and drove the darkness back.  Moon was calm as he continued forward.

Though knowing anything Pitch had to say was bound to be horrible, Jack felt strangely courageous.  The last time he’d found himself down here the circumstances had been different. He looked at Sandy as his golden light cast the darkness away from behind.

“Well, well. . .to what do I owe this _wonderful_ surprise?”

A well-educated, slithering voice spoke from the darkness when they had reached a large, tall cage strung up in the center of the space.  Inside, narrow, yellow eyes stared hatefully at them.  Smoke trailed out of the bars and between the trio.

Moon brushed the tendrils away with his hand and frowned.

“Good Evening, brother.” he said softly. “You are in good spirits as always.”

The looming figure of the Guardian of Nightmares thrust itself against the cage bars sinisterly. He scowled and bared his teeth threateningly when Moon’s light washed over him.

Jack held his staff closer.

Pitch was still as dark as ever.

“You have the audacity to come down here and _mock me_ in my own DOMAIN?” Pitch hissed hatefully.  “If I were loose I would. . .”

“Yes, I am sure you would.” Moon interrupted.  “But that isn’t why we are here.  We are here because we need a nightmare you have.”

Pitch’s face changed curiously.  It eased back and subtle surprise mixed with doubt crossed it.  He waited for a moment before smiling sinisterly and crossing his arms.

“You need _my_ help?  I thought I was worthless.”

“No, brother. . .no one said you were worthless.” Moon answered. “You interpreted it that way.  We’ve been over this.  Every Guardian has a duty they must do.”

Pitch scoffed.

“Easy for you to say, ruling from atop a mountain.” he snarled. “Meanwhile, I am locked up in a CAGE day in and day out. . .thrust into darkness like an unwanted _thing_!”

Sandy threw a ball of sand at Pitch causing the Guardian to hiss.  Sandman waved his arms about threateningly and glared.

“Yes, opposite of _you_.” Pitch answered.

“You are bound as we all are.” Moon informed him. “You will give me what I have asked for, Pitch.”

“I may not be inclined to do so, brother.” Pitch answered back.  “You see, I may be under the obligation to observe, monitor and delegate nightmares, I am under no obligation to give them to anyone _else_.”

Moon sighed softly.

“Pitch, I will only ask you one more time.  After that, I will _make_ you give me the nightmare I am looking for tonight.”

Pitch glared and uncrossed his arms.

“What good is a nightmare?” he asked cautiously. “Since when has a nightmare done anything for this planet or its. . . _inhabitants._ ”

Pitch said the last word with disgust.

Jack glared and pushed Moon aside angrily.

“Because that nightmare is going to help me save someone you almost stole from me the _first time_ , Pitch!”

Pitch was startled.  He looked at Jack Frost curiously.  The Winter Guardian looked worse for the wear.

He tilted his head.

“Jack. . .long time no see.  So, this nightmare is not so much for my brother as it is for _you_ then.”

Jack moved forward angrily.

“You know what happened to my First. . .and you are going to fucking SHOW ME.”

Moon put his hand on Jack’s shoulder when Pitch laughed.  He breathed into Jack’s ear and slowly pushed the fuming Guardian behind him again.  He turned back to his brother.

“I warned you, Pitch.”

Pitch roared when Moon’s eyes lit up and the light surrounding him increased ten-fold.  The Guardian of Nightmares drew as far back as he could before putting his arms over his eyes to shield them.  He spat in a language Jack could not understand, but whatever he said earned him another ball of sand to the face.

“ALL RIGHT!” Pitch yelled angrily. “I WILL SHOW YOU WHAT YOU WANT YOU ROTTEN SPAWN OF SATAN.”

Moon’s light decreased and his eyes returned to their calm, translucent glow. He smiled.

“Thank you, Pitch.”

Pitch hissed and looked at Moon.

“This nightmare is not for _you_ , brother.” he snarled.

He looked past the spirit to Jack.

He smiled secretly.

“I am sure he tried to dissuade you from watching it, didn’t he?”

Jack glared.

“It is my _right_ to know.” he hissed. “Jamie Bennett isn’t just my _First_. . .he’s _MINE_.”

This caught Pitch off guard.  He looked at Jack strangely before shape shifting and leaning against his hands and elbows in the air.  He smiled again.

“Well, well. . .isn’t this precious.” he murmured. “No wonder Moon is so fussy today.  Something like this hasn’t happened in a very long time.  You didn’t realise he was the one blocking you, did you?”

Jack held his staff tighter and ground it in his palms. He frowned.

“I know now.” he answered. “And I want to know why he did it.”

Pitch laughed softly.

“You are sure, are you?”

Jack did not give Pitch the benefit of doubt.  He nodded firmly.

“Yeah, I am.”

Pitch shrugged his head and stood up in his cell.  He wistfully began pulling dark, swirling clouds from all directions toward him.  He muttered to himself as he searched as one would a card catalogue.

“Ah, here it is. . .he actually had the nightmare you are looking for last night. . .how lucky.”

“How is that _luck_ you piece of. . .”

“ _BECAUSE_ the more recent the nightmare, the clearer it is.” Moon said overtop the Winter Guardian.  “It is as Pitch says. . .lucky.”

Pitch smiled smugly at Jack before holding out a dark sphere trailing black smoke.  He tilted his head and stared again.

“A word of caution about this nightmare, Jack.” he said softly. “I did not create it for him.  These events happened. . .and it was their consequences that caused Jamie to push you away.  Getting him back will be no easy task.”

Jack snorted.

“Then you obviously do not know how far I would go for him.” he answered.

Moon smiled faintly.

It was well spoken considering the circumstances.

Pitch acquiesced and opened the sphere in his hand.  A cry went through the air and the temperature dropped several degrees.  The smoke got thick and swirled around all four of the Guardians standing in the Other World.

Jack had to catch his breath when he found himself standing outside what appeared to be a large house.  He looked up and noticed that this was Jamie’s college.  Jamie had shown him what it looked like and where it was.  There were people all over the front lawn and up the front stairs.

Loud music was playing and everyone was laughing.

“Nothing good ever comes from alcoholic degradation.”

Jack jumped when Pitch appeared beside him. 

The Guardian of Nightmares put his hands behind his back and shook his head.

“I cannot harm you in a nightmare that has already happened, Jack.” he stated simply.  “I can only guide you through it.  As I said, this one is not a normal nightmare.”

Pitch started walking through the throngs of college kids.

“Are you coming?” he asked when he realised Jack was not following.

Jack quickly lifted his staff and followed Pitch into the house. 

The music was even louder inside.  There were people crowded everywhere.  Pitch passed through them casually until he stopped in front of a group of people standing in the corner talking.

He nodded at Jack and pointed.

Jack winced.

Jamie looked beautiful.  He’d always been beautiful to the Guardian, but in this moment, he was particularly beautiful.  Jack wanted to reach out to touch the human’s face but resisted.  He observed the cups in everyone’s hands and the group of people Jamie was with.

He recognised some of the faces as the children that had grown up and stopped believing. Others he did not know at all.  He tried to focus on Jamie.

_“Come on, Jamie!  That’s like, your first drink, man!”_

_“I told you I didn’t want to drink at all.”_

_“It is the first night of COLLEGE!  Live a little, bookworm!”_

_“Yeah, you won’t have time for this shit when you start classes!”_

_“Yeah, Chemistry ace.”_

Jack watched Jamie’s friends playfully tease him.  He was beginning to think that Pitch was lying to him.  He looked up when Pitch clicked his tongue.

“His friends should have taken better care of what they drugged.”

The Guardian waved his hand and time passed a little faster.

Jack watched Jamie’s friends pressure him into drinking more.  By the time he had finished counting there had to have been five or six cups that passed through Jamie’s hand.  He winced when he noticed Jamie was incredibly intoxicated.

“Jamie. . .”

“His age group is stupid.” Pitch dismissed. “This is an average Saturday night for them.”

He turned to look at Jack.

“This isn’t the worst of it.”

_“Hey, Jamie!  These are my brother’s friends.  They are Juniors.  They kinda roll like you do, man.”_

_“What are you talking about?” Jamie asked, blushing._

_One of the taller boys grinned and extended his hand.  He had a flattering smile and blonde hair.  His blue eyes were bright from his tanned face._

_“Kyle.” he said good-naturedly. “Stuart has told us a lot about you already.  I hear that your mathematics and chemistry skills are unmatched.”_

_Jamie shook the upper classman’s hand and tried to keep steady on his feet.  The music was filling his ears and he felt dizzy.  He knew he shouldn’t have started drinking._

_Drinking with his friends when they were by themselves was one thing.  Doing it in a house full of strangers was another._

_The other older student shook Jamie’s hand and pushed black bangs out of dark eyes.  He had pale skin and a nice smile.  He nodded in agreement._

_“Name’s Darren.  Half of campus could probably use a tutor.” he added._

_“But that’s not really why I am introducing them to you.” whined Jamie’s friend._

_“Let it go, Squeak.” Kyle said easily. “The night is still young.”_

_Darren grinned silently and nodded._

_“Yeah. . .no rush.”_

Jack was fuming as he watched the scene transpire.  He had a horrible twist in his stomach already.  He immediately distrusted the two, older students.

Pitch frowned.

“Do you remember when I said that I could not fully believe this nightmare, Jack?”

Jack looked at him.

“Yes.”

Pitch nodded.

“What results at the end makes Jamie feel that he is unworthy of your love.  He feels that he can no longer be beside you because he’s been ruined.  What horrors Jamie has created for himself are far greater than any I could fathom or produce. . .and I am the bloody Guardian of Nightmares.”

“Ruined?  What are you talking about?” Jack asked, watching his tone.

Pitch sped up the nightmare again so the night progressed.

Jack watched the two, older students he had a horrible feeling about draw Jamie farther and farther from his friends.  He began to feel the dark, angry feelings that Moon had warned him about as the one named Kyle led Jamie into a secluded room and Darren shut the door behind them.

Pitch looked at Jack.

“Last chance to walk away.”

Jack shook his head.

“I’m not a kid anymore.” he said softly. “Nothing could make me hate Jamie. . . _nothing_ , Pitch.”

Pitch smiled faintly.

“It really has been a long time since this has happened.” he murmured.  “How strange my brother seems to always pick them.”

Jack did not question the Guardian as they walked through the closed door to where the students were pressed up against Jamie’s sides.

_“You look cute when you’ve had enough to drink.” Kyle said running his thumb over Jamie’s lips.  “Your whole face is flushed.”_

_Jamie tried to clear his head.  He moved away from the advance._

_“I appreciate. . .the compliment. . .but, I should be going back. . .it is late. . .”_

_“C’mon, J. . .stay with us for a bit, yeah?” Darren asked, pulling Jamie into his arms and hugging him.  “Stu told us you play for the same team.  We do, too. . .you don’t have to worry about a thing.”_

_Jamie shook his head quickly and dislodged himself._

_“No. . .no, I am sorry. . .but, I can’t. . .”_

_“Why? You already got a boyfriend?” Kyle asked silkily._

_“Yes. . .back home.” Jamie answered truthfully._

_He trembled when Kyle held his face between his hands._

_“That’s like, 200 miles away, right?” Kyle asked, nuzzling Jamie’s cheek. “What he don’t know won’t kill him.”_

_A pitiful cry left Jamie’s throat before Darren’s hands started pulling his shirt up and running his fingers over his skin.  He tried to shake his head again._

_“Please, stop.”_

_“You can’t put out all the signs and then back out at the last second.” Darren said kissing the back of Jamie’s neck.  “That isn’t fair to us, is it?”_

_“Besides, like I said, what your boyfriend doesn’t know won’t kill him.”_

_Jamie tried to shove Kyle back when he moved to unbutton his jeans.  He glared and made to run for the door.  Another cry escaped his lips when Darren grabbed him around the middle and hauled him back._

_“That won’t do no good, J.” he said dangerously. “Keep thrashin’ around and we’ll have to hogtie you.”_

_When Jamie tried to free himself a second time, Kyle laughed and forced their lips together. It was a rough kiss without affection or love.  It made Jamie sick to his stomach._

_“Just relax. . .it will be over before you know it!”_

_Tears filled his eyes.  He couldn’t see, but he could feel his shirt being pulled over his head and wrapped around his arms. He was shaking when fingers undid his jeans and stroked him until he was hard._

_He shook his head violently._

_“Please STOP!”_

_Kyle grinned and looked at Darren._

_“We’ll have to shut this one up.” he said, smirking._

_“I get dibs on the back.” Darren answered pushing Jamie’s jeans past his hips._

_“S’all right.  I think I like his mouth better anyway.”_

_Jamie’s eyes were narrow and his voice was lost in his throat when Kyle forced himself through his lips.  He felt the older student’s hands against his head forcing him to move.  He tried to free his hands from behind his back. He tried to get any part of his body to resist._

_A strangled cry was cut off when Darren lifted Jamie’s hips and pressed his cock against his entrance.  He was visibly shaking._

**_No. . No. . .Please. . .this is for the one I LOVE. . .THIS IS FOR HIM! FOR JACK!_ **

_Jamie winced painfully when Darren pushed inside of him and thrust forward.  He was sobbing. He knew he was, but it was lost against the other cock in his throat.  Tears fell down his cheeks when Darren grinned._

_“Fuck, J. . .were you a VIRGIN?”_

_Kyle laughed._

_“A save yourself for marriage type. . .never lasts long in college.”_

_Jamie felt abused in a way he did not understand.  His eyes were narrow and his body was limp and at his captors’ command.  Why fight now?  He was ruined.  He was ruined for the one he truly loved.  Why would Jack ever take him now?_

_Another, feeble cry escaped his throat when Darren reached around and began stroking him.  He felt ashamed and embarrassed that he was hard at all.  If not for the fact that these bastards were doing this against his will, then the ALCOHOL should have stopped him from being interested at all._

_“Too bad your boyfriend doesn’t know what you feel like, J.” Darren said forcing his hips against Jamie’s backside. “I bet it would drive him crazy, too.”_

_Jamie gasped for breath when Kyle pulled free and came all over his face.  He shuddered violently and allowed his tears to fall.  He did not want what was going to happen next to happen. He could hear himself in his head._

_“Jack. . .”_

_Kyle smiled and admired his work._

_“Must be the name of his guy back home.” he mused._

_Darren laughed and thrust several more times before he came inside of the younger man and brought Jamie to climax.  He felt Jamie shudder violently.  He almost thought the younger kid had thrown up._

_He enjoyed the moment for a few seconds before pulling out.  He grinned when blood slid down the side of Jamie’s thigh._

_“Virgins. . .”_

_Jamie barely felt Darren untie his arms.  He barely heard them speak or leave the room.  He was in a paralysed form of shock that would not go away._

_His body felt dirty, destroyed and unworthy._

_It felt like an eternity before he could clean the mess off of his face, get his clothes back on and make his way out of the fraternity house.  He half stumbled, half ran to his dorm room and immediately walked into the shower, clothes and all._

_Jamie turned the water to cold and let it run over him.  He felt it soak through his clothes and begin to chill his skin.  When he felt like it was in his bones he slowly took his clothes off and tried to rid himself of the sickening feeling inside of his body._

_“I’m sorry, Jack!” he cried, putting his head against the tile. “I’m sorry!!”_

_Jamie slid to the floor while the water continued to run over him.  His tears were lost in the cold and his cries were drowned out by the noise on the floor.  He wrapped his arms around himself and rocked slowly._

_“I’m so sorry. . .”_

Pitch slowly stopped the images.  He looked back at Jack and was surprised to see that the Guardian of Winter was crying.  He tilted his head.

“Not quite the reaction I was expecting.” he commented.

Jack’s face was a mixture of pain, regret and sadness.  He wanted to reach out and touch Jamie while he cried.  The whole time he had wanted to stop what was happening.  Sure, he’d been angry and he would have wanted to kill both of the guys that had hurt _his_ First, but that all changed when he heard Jamie say _he_ was sorry.

Tears were creating long, frosted trails down Jack’s cheeks as the Guardian winced and closed his eyes.  He clutched his staff so tightly the wood groaned.  The remainder of the snow, ice and frost dissipated from it.

Pitch waited, curious.

He had fully expected Jack to get angry and let that hate and pain consume him.  To see this turn of events was honestly breath taking.  He’d seen his brother pick many a Guardian for this Season, but none had been as clever or unique as Jack.

Pitch had to give that to Moon.

He could certainly pick them.

“Is. . .this all of it?”

Jack’s voice was hoarse.  His eyes tore away from Jamie and looked at Pitch.

“Was there anything after this?”

Pitch shook his head.

“No.  This event is what caused his darkness to consume him.” he answered. “He felt ashamed for what had happened.  He felt it tarnished him. . .made him unworthy of your love because he hadn’t given himself to _you_.”

“That is. . .RIDICULOUS!”

Pitch turned to Jack when the Winter Guardian cried out.  He tilted his head.

“Oh?”

Jack angrily wiped the tears out of his eyes and glared at Pitch.

“I told you, Pitch.” he hissed. “I love Jamie Bennett no matter WHAT.”

“Perhaps Jamie did not feel the same.” Pitch offered softly. “You were something he coveted. You were everything to him.  He believes it was his own lack of common sense and will power that led to the events you witnessed.

“That guilt and pain grew and overtook that wonderfully bright light I could not smash no matter what I tried.”

The Guardian of Nightmares slowly put his hands behind his back and watched Jamie put his head on his knees and continue sobbing.  He pondered for a long moment before sighing.

“I do not know why I am helping you seeing as you put me here in the dark _forever_ ; but perhaps I am curious to see if my brother really has it in him to let one of his priests finally grow up for a change.”

Pitch turned to Jack, frowning.

“There was not another part to this nightmare. . .but he dreamed of this moments ago.”

The scene faded and changed.  The moonlight was the only light there was.  Jack let his eyes adjust and looked around.  He shook his head.

“The pond. . .”

Jack felt his chest get tighter.  He could see Jamie and Sophie coming up the path like they did every year when it was time for the Solstice. He shook his head.

“This. . .hasn’t. . .happened.”

Pitch shook his head.

“Something he’s planning.” he answered, watching Jamie wrap a silver chain around his wrist and hand.  “He had given this considerable thought earlier, but could not go through with it. Today, when his sister mentioned that tomorrow was the Solstice, this nightmare formed.”

“Why is it a nightmare, Pitch, if it hasn’t happened?”

Jack looked up when Pitch did not immediately reply.

The Guardian of Nightmares sighed and looked down at Jack.

“If your heart was broken and suffering. . .bleeding out of your chest. . .and you were a _stupid human_. . .what would be the first thing you tried to do?”

“Make the pain. . .stop. . .”

Jack’s voice trailed off when Sophie screamed and a violent cracking of the ice echoed toward him.  He could feel the cold water rushing over Jamie just as it had him years ago.  He began to shake visibly when he saw Bunny and North rush forward from the trees.

“Where. . .am I!?”

“In Jamie’s mind. . .you cannot love him.” Pitch answered softly. “You deserve someone pure and untouched.  That isn’t him anymore. . .and he simply cannot live without you, Jack.  He’d rather take his own life than go on alone.”

Jack shook his head violently and turned Pitch so he was facing the younger Guardian.

“Take me back now, Pitch.” he said as calmly as he could.  “I have to stop this.”

Pitch shrugged.

“As you wish. . .but as Moon probably already told you, this doesn’t mean that Jamie will allow you to see him. . .”

“No, but if he still believes, he’ll see _ME._ ” Jack answered heatedly.

Pitch smiled faintly.

“You are indeed clever if nothing else, Jack Frost.”

He turned and swept his hand across the image, wiping it away.  Jack gasped when he was back beside Moon and Sandy in the Other World. 

He put his hand against his chest and breathed for a moment.

“Jack?”

Jack looked up at Moon and shook his head.

“I have to go back.” he said quickly. “I have to stop him.”

“Stop him?” Moon asked, worried. “What are you talking about, Jack?”

“ _Jamie_!” Jack breathed. “He will DIE if I don’t go back NOW!”

Sandy looked alarmed and stared up at Moon.

Moon was at a loss for words.  His eyes were wide in his skull while Pitch chuckled from his cell.

“You heard your priest, brother!  It isn’t revenge or hatred he reaches for after seeing what you’ve kept from him. . .it is that wonderful trait I despise that he clings to for dear life.”

Pitch smiled at his brother’s confused stare.

“He clings to his heart. . .and his heart is stronger than any darkness a human can create.”

“Jamie Bennett isn’t just any human.” Jack said firmly. “He’s _MY_ human. . .and a part of _ME_.”

He looked up at Moon seriously.

“If I lose Jamie, you lose me.”

“Jack, that is not exactly a fair trade. . .balance, remember?  I would have to choose another. . . what would you do if I forced Jamie to pick up where you left off?” Moon sighed.

Jack shook his head defiantly.

“It doesn’t work like that.” he said aloud. “I spent 300 years of my Guardianship confused, in the dark and unknowing about who or what I was. . .that was YOUR fault, Moon. . .you did it ON PURPOSE. . .and since Jamie saw me. . .I’ve felt like a weight has _finally_ lifted from me. . .I will not let _ANYONE_ take that from me. . .

“Never again. . .”

Moon smiled, defeated.

“In this you believe that passionately, Jack?”

Jack nodded.

“I told you. . .I would die for Jamie.”

Sandy smiled and patted Jack’s shoulder when Moon nodded.

“I think we can make a compromise.” Moon said softly. “Tomorrow is the Winter Solstice after all. . .your magic is three times what it is now.”

Moon smiled warmly at the Winter Guardian.

“Who knows what you can accomplish with that much strength in your heart and your love.”

Pitch crossed his arms from where he stood.  He smiled faintly and closed his eyes.

“A word of advice, Jack.” he said easily. “Try not to run away like a child next time.”

“That was my fault, I am afraid.” Moon said, frowning. “I needed to be reminded that one cannot be left to stagnate.  If one does not grow and learn. . .then they ultimately wither and fade away.”

“Well, it only took you four Winter Guardians to figure that out, brother.” Pitch answered.

Jack was startled.

“I’m the Fifth?”

Moon nodded, embarrassed.

“Yes.” he whispered. “My Guardians of Winter are always the first to lose hope or fade away.”

Jack thought about this for a moment before reaching out and putting his hand on Moon’s arm.

“You aren’t getting rid of me that easily, Old Man.”

Moon was surprised and stared at Jack, confused for a moment.

Jack smiled and looked at Sandy.

“We have to save Jamie.”

Sandy nodded and set himself up to take off.

Jack looked at Moon.

“Thank you. . .for doing what you did.  I may have been an ass, but you took care of me. . .even when I didn’t deserve it.”

Moon smiled faintly and shook his head.

“The least I could do, right?”

Jack smiled back and turned to Pitch.

“Thank you, too, Pitch. . .maybe if you keep this up you’ll get out on good behaviour.”

Pitch scoffed and watched Jack leap into the air in a flurry of snow and ice.

Once Sandy and Jack had departed, Moon and Pitch stared at one another.

“There was more than the memory of the past?” Moon asked softly.

Pitch nodded.

“He’s contemplating suicide. . .the boy.”

Moon winced.

“I doubted Jack.  I was so worried he would react as. . .as. . .”

“As I would have reacted.” Pitch supplied easily. “Not all Guardians are programmed to get angry and full of rage, brother.  Guardians like Jack Frost are not built that way.  _Especially_ Jack Frost.”

Moon smiled faintly.

“His heart is very strong. . .like his love.”

“That is why you won’t have to worry about having human or Guardian blood on your hands this time.”

Moon and Pitch looked at one another again when Pitch spoke matter of fact.

“Will there come a time when your hatred dies, brother?” Moon asked.

Pitch shrugged, non-committal. 

“It depends on how long you keep me locked in a cage in my own domain.” he answered.

Moon nodded.

“Perhaps Jack was right.” he answered.  “I may be able to let you out on good behaviour.”

The two Guardians exchanged smirks when a cry echoed across the Other World.

Moon sighed.

“It begins.”

 


	9. My Best Friend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I re-watched the movie, pulled out my art book, cried a little bit and then made my husband watch the movie with me. xD
> 
> If I get hung up on this story too much longer, I am pretty sure I am going to get mauled by my TF2 and Ed, Edd and Eddy fandoms. . .badly.
> 
> Thank you for the hits, the loves, the hates, the whatevs. I am having a real fun time writing this. I really am. I love philosophy in a story. I really do. SO, in the words of Prince, I apologise if this rhyme goes astray. . .
> 
> Yours,  
> Six

Sophie frowned and kicked a rock that was on the path.

She’d been playing with her friends all day and it was getting dark.  She was walking home so she could get there before dinner started.  If she was late again she’d never hear the end of it.

Her blonde hair blew in the wind behind her and under her pink, winter hat.  Her bangs covered her right eye and she was lost in thought.  Her coat shielded her from the cold that grew colder as the sun drifted toward the horizon.

She stopped for a moment and stared.

The worry was starting to make her feel sick to her stomach.  She couldn’t explain how she felt to her parents because they would think she was imagining it.  They’d tell her she wouldn’t understand.  Jamie was in college and that was harder than high school.

Sophie shoved her hands in her coat pockets.  Her breath made small puffs of air in front of her.  The sunset was redder than she’d ever seen it during winter.  The ominous feeling only got worse.

“You stand out here much longer and you’re going to freeze.”

Sophie looked up and turned when she heard a familiar voice.  She was startled to see her brother walk toward her with his coat on.  She noticed it hung off of him pathetically.  His face looked even paler in the coming night.

Stars started to wake in the indigo blankets as Jamie came and stood beside his sister.  He did not have any hat or gloves on, but that was typical for him.  The cold hadn’t bothered him as much since he’d seen Jack.

Sophie glared.

“Oh, so _now_ you wanna talk to me?”

“I came to apologise.” Jamie said softly. “It isn’t your fault I feel this way, Sophie.  I guess I am jealous, that’s all.”

Sophie lost her steam when she noted how sad her brother’s voice became.  Her eyes narrowed and she shook her head.

“Jealous?  Why, Jamie?”

Jamie smiled.

“Because you can still see.”

“You can, too!” Sophie argued. “You never stopped _believing_ , Jamie. That’s a load of horse shit if I ever heard it. . .”

She bit her lower lip before shaking her head.

“Jack would never push you away, Jamie.  You know that, don’t you?”

Jamie looked at Sophie for a moment before turning his eyes to the Moon rising in the sky.  His heart was sinking in his chest.  If it was beating, he could not tell.  His eyes were blood shot and very dark beneath.

“He would if you knew what had happened, Sophie.”

“Then why won’t you _tell me_!?” Sophie cried, grabbing her brother’s arm. “You can’t tell me that you’ve given up on _Jack Frost_.”

Jamie smiled down at her and shook his head.

“How could anyone give up on Jack Frost?” he asked softly.

“Obviously the guy who loves him can!”

Jamie looked at Sophie, surprised, before slowly turning away and watching the sun disappear.  He was quiet for some time before smiling faintly.

“How did you know I loved him?”

Sophie rolled her eyes.

“Bunny told me that Jack had come all the way to the Pole to ask North about it.  Jack wanted to know if it was wrong for a male guardian to have a priest and not a priestess.  It was the same year you asked North for the chance to snog him good, remember?”

Jamie laughed.

“You saw that?”

“I saw enough.” Sophie admitted stubbornly. “Enough to know my brother loves Jack Frost enough to do something incredibly stupid or foolish.”

Jamie waited before shaking his head.

“That was one of the best Christmas presents ever.” he said softly. 

His eyes were kind for a moment, lost in a memory of Jack that did not cause him pain.

Jack’s lips felt like fresh fallen snow and they were cool, but not freezing.  Jamie’s lips did not freeze because his body was so warm in comparison. Jack’s eyes looked so bright on that Solstice.  They were almost clear.  He was practically glowing by the end of the night.

Jamie closed his eyes and remembered the way the icy fingers passed over his face and back through his hair.  The frost had melted immediately.  Jack never felt cold to him.  Likewise, Jamie’s body heat never bothered Jack.  It had been a perfect combination of hot and cold.

“Jamie?”

Jamie started and realised tears were streaming down his face.  He looked at Sophie, scared and surprised for a moment.  His sister’s grip on his arm had become so tight it was beginning to hurt.

Sophie shook her head and reached up to brush the tears out of her brother’s eyes. She was trembling.  It wasn’t from cold or from the dark. . .it was from fear.

She winced when Jamie put his hand over hers and held it there.

“Don’t give up, Jamie.” she whispered painfully. “Please do not give up on him!  He’s coming tomorrow! You know he is!  Whatever happened. . .whatever you cannot tell me, or Mom or Dad. . .please tell Jack!  Don’t push someone you love away. . .you only break their heart, too, Jamie!”

Sophie gasped when Jamie hugged her so tightly he lifted her off her feet.  Her eyes started to sting when she heard how awful her brother’s lungs sounded.  She painfully wrapped her arms around him and put her head on his shoulder.

“Don’t leave us!” she begged softly.

“I’m not. . .going anywhere, Sophie.” Jamie breathed back. “It’s. . .just hard. . .something I never want you to know about. . .something I never want you to feel.”

Sophie shook her head, confused.

Jamie set her back on the ground and put his hands on her shoulders.  He smiled weakly.  Tears were still in his eyes.

“Feel what, Jamie?”

“Feel what it is like to know you can never serve your Guardian as their priest or priestess because of a stupid mistake you made in college.”

It took Sophie a long time to process this statement.  Once she had, her eyes narrowed and she started crying.  She shook her head violently and wrapped her arms around Jamie’s waist.  She buried her head in his chest and sobbed 

Jamie was silent.  He held his sister while she cried.  He couldn’t bear to give his little sister all of the horrific details of the ordeal, but he could put it in simple terms she could understand.  She was as committed to Bunny as he had been to Jack.

Sophie would understand his implied meaning.

“WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME, JAMIE!? WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL MOM OR DAD!?” Sophie yelled angrily. “WHY DIDN’T YOU SAY ANYTHING!?”

“How would you feel if you knew you could no longer be with the one you loved because of a decision that caused something like that to happen?” Jamie asked back.  “It isn’t a pleasant thing for me to handle on my own, either.”

Sophie leaned back and shook her head.

“Jack would not stop seeing you. . .he would not have abandoned you, Jamie.  You are being a fucking ASSHOLE!  CAN YOU IMAGINE HOW JACK FEELS??”

She was shaking violently now.

“He doesn’t even know, does he?” she asked dangerously. “Jack doesn’t know you were hurt.”

Jamie was silent.

When the silence lingered, Sophie angrily shoved her brother back and spat something in a language he did not understand.  She looked up at him and shook her head.

“When did it happen?”

“Last year.”

“When you started school?”

Jamie nodded.

Sophie’s face eased back and she sighed.

“That’s why you couldn’t see North either. . .and he couldn’t see _you_.”

Jamie was startled.

“North couldn’t see _me_?”

Sophie nodded back.

“He asked me where you were. . .he did not believe me when I said you were right there in the room with me. . .the look on his face, Jamie. . .I knew it wasn’t good. . .whatever you were doing was _blocking them_ from seeing you!

“You are _blocking Jack,_ Jamie!”

“I wouldn’t want him to see me like this anyway.” Jamie mused softly. “I do look like a walking zombie.”

“If I had been taken advantage of that badly, I would be, too!” Sophie answered. “But, you cannot keep it all inside!  You cannot shove away those that love you when you need those people the most!

“I am not lying when I say no one’s seen Jack, Jamie.  Ever since last year when you did not come for the Solstice. . .Jack has been missing.”

Jamie looked down.

“It wasn’t his fault.”

“It wasn’t YOUR fault!” Sophie cried, exasperated. “Please. . .please do not let this consume your good heart, Jamie!  You were the last believer in the entire WORLD. . .!  You cannot just GIVE UP!”

Jamie shook his head.

“I gave up when it happened.” he answered softly. “I had planned to offer that part of myself to Jack last year during the Solstice I missed.  After what happened, I felt. . .unworthy.  He deserved someone better.”

“Oh, that. . .that is just. . .just. . .RIDICULOUS!” Sophie cried angrily.  “Jack Frost could never love anyone more than he loves _you_ , Jamie!  No matter what happened or what was taken, Jack would still want you and would protect you and make it so it never happened again!

“You don’t honestly think Jack wouldn’t have intervened if he could have, do you!?”

Jamie did not answer.

He hadn’t thought about it the other way around.

The flicker of hope in his heart fizzled out quickly when he shook his head and closed his eyes, the dark circles slowly creeping across his eyelids.

“I’m not sure about you, Sophie, but I am pretty sure the pre-requisite to be a priest or priestess is that you have to remain pure, remember?”

Sophie stared, dumbfounded.

Where had her older brother gone?  What had happened to the brother she knew and loved?  Had this really done so much damage it could never be undone?

She clutched the sides of Jamie’s jacket helplessly.

“No one is without sin.” she breathed. “Not the Guardians, not Moon, not God, not anybody!  Everyone has something that weighs them down and makes them feel pain, guilt, remorse or sadness.  There is always a dark shadow to the light.  If there wasn’t, the beautiful parts wouldn’t mean as much to us!

“That doesn’t mean we give up at the first sign of disaster!  That doesn’t mean we throw away our beliefs in what we _know is true_.  We cling to faith and we cling to each other and somehow, we always make it to the other side better than we were when we began.  You have to believe that, Jamie!

“You have to stop blaming yourself for something that was not your fault.  Jack would be heartbroken to see you like this!”

“Which is why he can’t see me.” Jamie answered, smiling at Sophie.

He bowed his head and carefully put his hands over his sister’s.  He waited for a moment before slowly shaking his head and looking back at her.

“Thank you, Sophie.” he said, smiling. “You’ve always been my best friend, even though you’re a pest sometimes.  I am sorry I did not tell you. . .about what had happened.  But it’s in the past, and I cannot undo it.  That is killing me.

“I’ll do all I can to make sure that your belief stays stronger than mine was.”

“Is.” Sophie corrected immediately.  “And my belief is just fine.  I wouldn’t abandon Bunny even if he tried chucking me out of the Warren. . .and trust me, he’s thought about it on occasions."

Jamie laughed softly.  His heart hurt less, but still ached miserably in his chest.  He was happy he was able to tell someone. . .anyone. . .about how far he’d fallen.

It made doing what he was going to do easier.

“I came to get you for dinner, but, I really wanted to apologise and tell you I will go with you to the Pond for the Solstice.”

Sophie, not sensing anything was amiss about that, smiled brightly through her tears and nodded ecstatically.

“You will!?”

Jamie nodded.

“You asked me. . .and even if Jack doesn’t see me, or know I’m there. . .you can tell him I am if you want.”

Sophie winced, but took what she could get.  She believed.  She believed in her brother’s conviction so much she was willing to bet on it.  If it was not her brother’s love in Jack Frost then Jack Frost’s love in her brother.  That was a two-way street. 

It went both ways.

“Come on, Soph. . .it is cold and your nose is redder than Rudolph’s.” Jamie said, hugging Sophie and turning her toward home. “You wouldn’t want a cold before Christmas, would you?”

“Wouldn’t be the first time.” Sophie answered, rolling her eyes.

She walked along with her brother, their boots crunching in the snow.  She was silent for a long time before saying anything else.

“Jamie. . .you’d tell me. . .if. . .if the pain was too much?  You wouldn’t. . .just leave us here?”

Jamie did not miss a beat.  He nodded slowly and hugged Sophie to his side.

“Don’t worry, Bean Head. I’m not going anywhere. . .I’m afraid you’re stuck with me.”

This left Sophie feeling better, but not relieved.  If anything, it kept her on her guarded caution.  She looked up at Jamie and wrapped her arm around his waist.

“Jamie. . .I love you a lot, you know that, right?  You are like, the best big brother a sister could have.”

Jamie smiled.

“I love you, too, Sophie.” he answered. “You’re not bad for a little sister.”

“Don’t leave me, Jamie.” Sophie whispered, stopping Jamie before he led them inside their house. “Don’t leave.”

Jamie looked at Sophie curiously.

“Sophie, I’m right here. . .I’m not going anywhere.”

“I don’t believe you.” Sophie said finally. “I feel. . .I feel that’s not true. . .I’m scared, Jamie.  Don’t lie to me. . .please don’t lie.”

Jamie kissed Sophie’s forehead and smiled.

“Don’t be scared.” he answered softly. “I can’t lie to you forever, that’s obvious, right?  I trust you more than anyone on Earth.  Don’t give up on me, okay?”

Sophie nodded painfully when Jamie pulled away.

“Okay, Jamie. . .I won’t.” she answered back. “I won’t give up on you.”

“Then, it will be okay.”

Sophie allowed Jamie to take her hand and lead her up the sidewalk toward the front door.  She felt a growing sickness pass from her brother to her hand.  The dark, wispy trails she recognised only in her nightmares were clinging to Jamie like a cloak.

Her eyes filled with tears and she had to angrily wipe them away with her mitten before her parents came to greet them.

This couldn’t be happening to _her_ brother.  _Her_ brother single-handedly defeated Pitch and darkness.  He couldn’t fall prey to it, too, could he?

From the shadows of Sophie’s room, Bunny watched Sophie come back into the house.  She appeared to be holding something or someone.  He winced when he saw her wipe the tears out of her eyes.

“She’s with the kid.” he murmured.  “I haven’t seen Sophie cry like that since she trampled the carrot patch.”

Bunny frowned.

Sophie’s heart was sick with worry and fear.  It wasn’t consumed by it, but it was incredibly afraid.  She was fearful for someone _else’s_ heart.

“Her brother’s.” Bunny said softly.  “She’s a good sister.”

He crossed his arms and closed his eyes.  He thought for a long time while he listened to Sophie engage her mother in a more spirited discussion.  He knew that this was her defence mechanism. She’d used it against him a number of times.

“There is darkness here that isn’t related to Pitch or anything we understand as Guardians.” Bunny said aloud.  “This is. . .is something. . .something only Jack can fix.”

The Spring Guardian glared out the window as the Moon rose higher in the sky.

“I hope you plan on givin’ him back sometime soon!” he said irritably. “Haven’t we given you enough blood?  Wasn’t the destruction of my people enough for you and yours?”

Bunny closed his eyes and fell silent again.

He hated how the Man in the Moon was better at the silent game than he was.


	10. Kings and Queens

Sophie picked at her food while Jamie talked animatedly with their parents.  The feeling in her heart had not improved.  Her stomach was still tied in knots and she didn’t feel like eating.  She stirred her peas into her mashed potatoes and frowned.

This was unnatural.  Why didn’t her parents realise that?  Why couldn’t they feel it like she did?

She angrily put her silverware down on her plate and pushed herself away from the table.

“Sophie!  What in the world is wrong!?”  her mother asked, worried. “You haven’t eaten a thing!”

“I feel sick, okay!?” Sophie answered, going toward the kitchen door. “I’m going to bed early.”

Jamie looked down.

This was having unexpected consequences.

“What in the devil got into her?” their father asked aloud.

“She did stay out in the cold all day.” their mother answered, still worried. “Maybe she is just feeling ill like she says.  I will say she hasn’t been herself since Jamie got back home.”

Jamie winced.

“She’s probably unhappy I decided to go to school so far away.” he answered softly. “She did mention that she was upset about that before I left last year.”

“That is no reason to throw silverware, pound on doors and be a menace.” his mother said grabbing Sophie’s plate and scraping the food from it into the scraps bin.  “She’s been positively unpredictable!”

“Let it go, darling. I am sure it is just teenage drama. . .or angst. . .either way she will be okay.” his father said sympathetically.

Jamie finished what was left on his plate and smiled at his parents.

“Thank you for dinner. It was great.”

His mom smiled when he stood up and kissed her cheek.  She hugged him and set him back happily.

“I am so proud of you, Jamie.”

“Me, too, son.” his father added, standing up.  “You’ve done better than I did when _I_ went to college. . .and it’s only your first year!”

Jamie smiled.

“Thank you, Mom, Dad.” he answered. “I love you. . .Sophie will be okay.  I acted the same way at her age.”

“And girls are always worse.” his mother agreed.

“I have some reading to catch up on before bed.” Jamie said softly. “Good night.”

“Good night, Jamie.  Sweet dreams.” his mother said kissing him again.

His father gave him a quick hug and allowed him to leave the kitchen.

Jamie moved through the front hall and up the stairs.  He slowly climbed them and passed by Sophie’s door.  He could hear her crying behind it.

His eyes narrowed.

This came at a high cost. . .maybe higher than he had gauged originally.

This did not dissuade him as he walked into his room and locked the door behind him.  The window was still open and snow was gathered on the floor beneath it.  Jamie went straight to the desk and pulled out another notebook.

He may have lied about reading, but he did have writing to do before the night ended.  After tomorrow, it would be all that was left.  It would be the only way Sophie and his parents and everyone else would understand.

Jamie grabbed another pencil whose end had only been partially chewed on.  He stared at the blank page for a moment before slowly beginning to write.

He continued until his eyes were heavy and his hands were frozen through to the bones.  When he had finished the last of the letters he had wanted to write, he set the pencil down and put his head on his arms.

His heart only felt heavier in his chest.

There was no respite from the pain.

…………………………………

Sophie drew her knees up under her chin and wrapped her arms around them while she sat on her bed crying.  Her room had become pinker over time and had various items she had collected over the years strewn about.  Unlike her brother, she preferred a slightly messier room rather than having a place for everything.

Her hair hung over her face and stuck to her cheeks. Her eyes were miserable and she felt like she was going to throw up again.  She’d heard Jamie come upstairs over an hour ago.  His window hadn’t shut since he’d come home. The chill was starting to creep under _her_ door.

Sophie rubbed the tears out of her eyes, her cheeks red and forehead warm.

She’d either worked herself into a fever or she really was getting sick.  Maybe the stress was making her sick.  Maybe she was going crazy.

She turned on her side and remained curled up.  Her hair splayed out behind her as she stared at the wall.  Whatever was causing this, she wished it would go away.

Her throat was hurting from too much crying.

“You know, Peace Lily, I haven’t seen you cry this much since you accidently trampled my new carrot patch. . .”

Sophie turned her head when she heard the familiar voice behind her.  She smiled faintly when Bunny stood close to her open closet.  She nodded.

“That would have been. . .one of the times. . .you threatened. . .to throw me out of the Warren.” she answered hoarsely.

Bunny was startled by how sore she sounded.  He stepped forward slowly.

“Are you feelin’ all right, love?”

Sophie turned away from him and shook her head.

“No.” she answered.

Bunny winced.

He could feel the start of a fever and sore throat.  Sophie always had the tendency to get sick easily. It is often why he tried to keep her out of the cold.  She didn’t handle it as well as her brother.  He supposed that was his fault to an extent.

He looked around helplessly before looking down at his paws.

How long had it been since he had tried to shape shift?  Had it been ten years? Twenty?

Bunny strained his memory.  Maybe it had been even longer than that.

He closed his eyes and focused on the image he had in his mind.

Sophie brought her hands to her face when she sneezed.  She moaned and curled over herself tighter.  She hated being sick.  Why in the hell had she stayed out so late again?

_I stayed out because my team was winning the snowball fight.  I know exactly why I did it._

She closed her eyes and panted softly.  Her skin was too hot and she felt sick to her stomach.  Her heart was still aching.  Nothing had been resolved.  In her mind it had only gotten worse.  It had only gotten more complicated.

Her brother was acting strange.  He apologised to her, he actually ate dinner tonight and he talked avidly during the meal.  He was putting on a face.  She knew an act when she saw it.  She was a magnificent actress.  She recognised talent when it was spouting off in front of her.

Sophie opened her eyes narrowly when she felt the mattress sink behind her.  She did not move because she knew who it was.  It wasn’t until a gentle hand pulled her hair away from her neck that she realised something was different.

She turned over quickly and let her jaw drop.  She stared into eyes she definitely recognised, and undeniable bunny ears she still insisted on grabbing every now and then.  She looked at the rest of him like she had seen a ghost.

“Bunny!? Is that. . . _you_!?”

The taller, unique-looking human nodded slowly.  His ears twitched nervously while Sophie stared at him, dumbfounded.  He supposed he shouldn’t have kept this from her for so long.  Looking back on it, she would have been better prepared had she known he could change shapes.

Sophie quickly sat up and stared.  She hesitated for a moment before reaching out and touching his face with her hand.  Her face eased back when he leaned into her touch and put his hand over hers.  It was strange without his fur, but it wasn’t unpleasant.

“You can. . .change shapes?”

Bunny nodded again.

Long, black hair streaked with grey was tied in a loose ponytail behind him.  He wore a well fabricated tunic that was laced together at the top with leather cord.  The dark green suited him.

_It makes his eyes stand out._

Sophie felt her cheeks go a shade redder.  She smiled faintly.

“You know. . .I think I overheard Jack and Jamie talking about it one time, but I didn’t believe them.” she said softly. “Maybe it was because I liked you just the way you were. . .are. . .”

“I have not changed shapes in a long time.”

His voice was exactly the same.  Sophie was grateful for that.  It was one of the things she liked most about the Guardian.

“My kind can. . .and have changed shapes to serve as needed.” Bunny continued carefully. “When I was the last one. . .”

He paused for a moment before shaking his head.

“. . .I guess I didn’t see much point in changin’ my shape anymore.”

“Then. . .why did you now?” Sophie asked, confused.

She was startled when Bunny grasped her hands in his and held them tightly.  She stared at him, slightly on edge, when he concentrated on her fingers entwined with his.  His skin was much paler than hers.

_That’s a first.  I am the whitest kid in school._

“I changed shape because to serve as I am needed I need to be human.” Bunny answered softly. “I was afraid at first, but I don’t have that fear anymore.  After seein’ what Jack and your brother are goin’ through. . .”

He stopped again.  A terrible wince filled Sophie with the same sickness her brother filled her with.

“Bunny. . .”

“Aster.”

Sophie raised her eyebrows.

“I’m sorry?”

“That is my real name.” Bunny said softly.  “Aster.”

Sophie looked down, shocked, for a moment before looking up at him with a kind smile.

“It’s a pretty name.” she said aloud. “How come you never told me?”

“Again, I was the only one left. . .and I didn’t want what happened to everyone of my kind before to happen to someone else.” Bunny answered.  “It was easier being alone and doing the work MiM gave me.”

He looked into Sophie’s eyes very seriously.

“That changed when I met you, Sophie.”

Sophie smiled again.

“I am nothing special, B. . .I mean, Aster.” she said, careful to use the correct name.  “I am just a kid who wandered into your Warren uninvited and started helping herself.”

“Most kids don’t. . .and that is what I loved about you.” Bunny said, grinning.

His teeth were sharp and white.

“You had adventure in you even at such a young age.  That surprised and delighted me for some reason.  I guess. . .it reminded me of when I was a lot younger.”

“I cannot imagine you as anything but deathly serious.” Sophie laughed.  “I get in trouble all the time!”

“I’ve been alive a lot longer than you.” Bunny said, smiling sweetly.

He stopped here and stared at Sophie’s hands.  Her fingers had always been small and narrow.  Her nails were painted an electric kind of pink with green and blue lines carefully painted over the tops.

He tilted his head.

“I wanted you to see this side of me.” he said finally.  “There was a time when I served humans in a more functional capacity than I do now. . .but, the whole, last one standing left it pointless to continue.  Not to mention the workload was tremendous for only one of me.”

Sophie shook her head.

“I love you no matter what shape you’re in, Aster.” she said, smiling sweetly.

Her cheeks were a bright red and her blue eyes were sparkling in the dim light plugged in on her desk. She held Bunny’s hands tighter in hers and laughed.

“I fell in love with you a long time ago!”

The breath left her lungs when Bunny leaned forward and gently put his lips against hers.  She was startled and it took a minute for her eyes to close completely.  She was positive she was hallucinating.  She had gone completely out of her gourd and was half way across the Universe.

_It’s awful real if it is just a dream._

Bunny pulled away, a bit embarrassed.  He waited until Sophie opened her eyes and looked at him again.  He shook his head.

“It’s harder to do that when I have a pair of buckteeth in the way, love.”

Sophie laughed.  This eased Bunny’s nerves and he smiled with her.

“That’s true, I guess!” she admitted happily.  “But, it still never bothered me.”

“I know that, that is why I care about you so much, Peace Lily.” Bunny answered. “You know why I call you Peace Lily, Sophie?”

Sophie shook her head.

“I just thought it was a nickname.  Peace Lilies are common around Spring and Easter, right?”

Bunny nodded.

“I call you that because I do not want any other Guardian takin’ what belongs to me.”

Sophie was startled. 

Her hair fell back in her face when Bunny glared and looked off to the side.  She waited, pins and needles starting to sting her legs, while the Guardian thought.  She could hear her heartbeat in her ears.

“Peace Lily means that you are special to me.  You are a ward.” Bunny said finally. “It lets any other spirit or Guardian know they will tangle with me if they try anything.  You have Spring on your side.

“When you are the Lily of the Valley that means that you mean more to me than my ward.  You are under my direct protection.  If anything harms you I will defend you.”

Bunny swallowed hard and kept his eyes firmly rooted on the floor.  His cheeks felt hot when he thought about how to explain the last part.

“Let me have a guess.” Sophie said suddenly. “If I am an Easter Lily that means no one better fuck with me because you’ll rip their heads off. . .because. . .I am like. . .your girlfriend?”

Bunny turned to her, surprised.  He watched Sophie grin at him, waiting for him to confirm or deny her statement.  He fumbled for a moment before nodding.

“Yeah.”

Sophie tilted her head to the side.

“That’s sweet, Aster.” she said softly. “I feel bad that I did not realise the name meant so much.”

Bunny shook his head quickly.

“The person or thing being protected doesn’t always know what the signal or sign is when a Guardian chooses them.” he said aloud. “A good example would be my sign against North’s. You will know if North had picked someone he is carefully guarding.”

“Really?”

Bunny nodded.

“Hard to miss fireworks coming off someone in your general range of motion.”

Sophie laughed.

“That’s not really inconspicuous is it!?”

“Well, if it is for spirits and Guardians alone. . .then it can get intense.” Bunny admitted. “We have a tendency to want to show off to one another.”

“No, you don’t say.” Sophie said almost dreamily.

She smiled.

“Why are you telling me all of this now, Aster?  I guess. . .I would assume I would eventually make my way up to Easter Lily if you still like me when I am horrifically old?”

Bunny flinched.

“I had wanted to wait a little longer.” he admitted softly. “But. . .”

He stopped and turned away.  His eyes were sad and faraway for a moment.  He didn’t know how to explain to her how he felt.

Sophie untangled one of her hands from his and gently put it against his face.  She turned him back toward her and smiled.

“Aster, I am a 15 year old human girl in high school.  I know more about relationships, drama and angst than any other species on the _planet_.  I won’t judge you.”

She scooted closer to him, delighted he was as warm as he usually was.

Bunny’s hand slid over the one against his cheek.  He stared at Sophie earnestly.

“Losin’ Jamie as Jack has done scared the fuck outta me, love.” he breathed. “When I saw the piker last, he looked better than ever. . .the last person to see him tells me he looks like a corpse of his former self.”

“Like Jamie.” Sophie mentioned off-hand.

“Jamie looks the same?” Bunny asked back.

Sophie nodded.

“He’s pale white.  His eyes are darkening and he is really thin.  It’s like all of the colour is draining out of him. 

“That’s just like Jack.” Bunny sighed.

He trembled and shook his head.

“I don’t want you to ever feel that way. . . _never_.”

“I don’t.”

“Not now. . .but you aren’t old enough to understand what your brother’s been through.” Bunny interrupted.

Sophie looked indignant.

“Really?  I think I know more than you think I do.” she answered. “It happened to one of my close friends when she was 13.  A family member did it to her. . .and I think she would have been happier if it was a total stranger.  You don’t get over the feeling of neglect, abuse and fear when your own _family_ puts you through an experience like that.

“Your heart becomes twisted with every shadow and dark thought possible!  You become hopeless sometimes!  That’s why I am scared, Aster!  That’s why I am sick, no doubt!  I’m sick because Jamie is going to do something incredibly stupid. . .and I know I cannot stop him.”

Bunny pulled Sophie into his arms and held her against his chest when she began to cry.  He held her tightly and kissed the top of her head when her fingertips dug into his shoulder blades.  He closed his eyes and shook his head.

“I’m sorry, Lily.” he breathed. “I am sorry I assume so much.”

“It’s. . .not. . . _your_ fault. . .” Sophie sniffled against his shirt. “I’ve. . gotten used to it. . .actually.”

Bunny smiled half-hearted when Sophie leaned back and looked at him.  He drew an arm back and carefully wiped the tears out of her eyes with his fingers.  He was careful his claw like nails did not scratch her.

Sophie smiled a little and leaned into his touch.

Bunny hissed faintly.

“You’re burnin’ up, love.”

“I told you I was getting sick!” Sophie whined.

Bunny gathered her closer and held her tighter.  He put his cheek on the top of her head.

“Jack will find a way to save Jamie.” he said with more conviction than he had at the Pole. “If that runt cares about anything more than ruinin’ a perfectly good Easter, it is your brother.  He’ll do anything he has to, Sophie.  Anything.”

“I don’t want either of them to be hurt!” Sophie whispered.

“If Jack gets to Jamie in time, neither of them will be.”

Immense relief rushed over the Guardian when he said this.  He felt so much conviction in his words that he was compelled to look out Sophie’s window at the Moon.  He was startled to see a golden blue comet in the distance. . .the _near_ distance.

“Jack will save him, love. . .you just have to trust him.”

Sophie leaned back and looked up at Bunny curiously.  She heard the tone change in the Guardian’s voice immediately.  She waited for him to explain.

Bunny gently turned her around and pointed out toward the window.

“I’ve seen it one other time.” he whispered in her ear. “Sandy and I had to make a trip up there after Pitch’s War on my homeland.  If Sandy is the gold, who do you think the blue is?”

Sophie laughed as her eyes filled with tears.  She brought her clasped hands up to her lips.

“It’s Jack!” she cried softly. “It has to be!”

Bunny nodded, his heart eased by seeing her smile and feeling the tension in her heart decrease significantly.

“That’s right.  He’ll be here by the Solstice. . .just in time to save the day if we get the story book version. . .at this rate, I believe MiM owes it to Jack.”

Sophie turned to him, confused.

“He does?”

Bunny nodded again.

“Jack isn’t the first Winter Guardian he’s chosen.” he said softly. “But he is by far one of the most annoying, resilient and resourceful ones he’s recruited to date.”

Sophie smiled, a few stray tears running down her face.  She nodded slowly.

“I can’t interfere, can I?”

Bunny shook his head.

He watched her sigh and turn her body back around so she was sitting up against him again.

“You won’t let me go through this God Awful experience by myself, will you?”

Bunny shook his head again.

“No, love.  I’ve got strict instructions to stay right here.  You’re the only one that can see Jamie. You are pretty much the most important person the Guardians have ever needed right now.”

Sophie grinned.

“That beats being the Homecoming Queen any day.”

Bunny tilted his head to the side.  He watched her smile and straighten his shirt where her crying had rumpled it.  He gently held her face in his hands.

Sophie waited patiently. Her smile was coming easier now.  She was relieved that Jack was on his way.  If anyone stood the best chance to get through to her stupid brother now it was him. Her blue eyes narrowed warmly.

“What, you dork?” she asked playfully.

“If I asked, would you be _my_ Queen?”

Sophie liked watching the embarrassment spread over the Guardian’s face.  She did appreciate this form for that fact alone.  She could tell when he was blushing.  She liked when she made a guy nervous.  It meant she had really made an impression.

But, just because she liked to watch him squirm didn’t mean she was going to make it easy, either.

“Well, you have to ask.” she answered softly.

Her fingers threaded through his bangs and pushed them out of his eyes.  She tugged on one of his ears for good measure and smiled.

Bunny’s face eased back.

He was familiar with this game after knowing Sophie for so long.  At first he found it tedious and annoying.  But, the longer he and Sophie stayed together, the easier it was to get along with her.

“Will you be my Queen, Sophie?”

“Oh, for sure.” Sophie answered automatically. “I wouldn’t let _anyone_ else have you after I’ve spent my entire life around you.  I mean, I’ve loved you since I was five, right?  That takes commitment.  Seeing as I was only a kid and I still feel the same way about you as I did then it seems only natural I get to claim what’s rightfully mine.”

This made the Guardian grin.

“Yours, eh?”

Sophie nodded resolutely.

“Yes. Mine.”

“Perhaps you should be askin’ me then, love.” Bunny teased back.  “You know I wouldn’t trade you for anything. . .no matter how many of my garden plots you stomp through.”

Sophie grinned back.

She wasn’t afraid of a challenge.

“Aster Bunnymund, are you gonna be my King or do I have to string you along for _another_ ten years for you to get all of this cordiality out of your system?”

Bunny laughed and put his forehead against hers.

He loved this girl.  He did.  There wasn’t anything more he wanted than what he had sitting right in front of him.

“It’s my honour, Sophie.” he said softly.

“I do so love when I can skip a grade.” Sophie answered, smiling.

Bunny smiled back at her and pulled her into his arms.

It was unconventional, but he had no other options. He could continue on by himself; but that had become tedious _and_ lonely.  He couldn’t say he didn’t miss his kind.  His Warren was huge and it was completely empty save for him.  He was becoming tired with that routine.

If anything were true, Bunny was happy Sophie stumbled along and kept coming back.  The longer she fought his attitude and “old fashioned-ness” as she called it, the more open he became. Once he’d realised that the situation between Jack and Jamie was going to hell in a hand basket, he wasn’t about to let the one that had charmed him grow up and walk away from him.

Sophie buried her face in Bunny’s chest.  She knew he was happy.  Whenever he was happy he was like a furnace he got so warm.  He may as well have a fire burning inside of him.

She smiled.

Bunny sighed when Sophie sneezed again and moaned miserably.  He leaned her back and put his wrist against her forehead.

“Yer warmer than before!”

Sophie laughed.

“You’re puttin’ out more heat than a butane torch!” she replied jovially.  “It’s just all the stress.  I don’t take stress or cold well, you know that.”

Bunny frowned.

“You should rest if you are playin’ the fool tomorrow.”

Sophie had to think about that for a moment before understanding what he meant.  She nodded.

“Yeah, I am not as good as Jamie when it comes to that.” she sighed wistfully.

She turned around so that her feet were on the floor on the other side of the bed.  She grabbed the hem of her shirt and pulled it over her head.  She heard Bunny make some sort of noise of dissent and turn his head.

She grinned and looked over her shoulder.  She laughed when she saw the red in the high cheekbones that were turned away from her.

“Really, Aster? _Really_?”

Bunny resisted the urge for a few moments longer before sighing and looking at her.

“What in the hell has gotten in to teenagers these days?” he asked instead.

“Hormones, too much porn on the internet?” Sophie offered as she undid her bra and tossed it on the floor with her shirt.  “Pretty sure Sex Ed does it for some of them.”

She smiled and pulled her long hair over one of her shoulders when she unbuckled her belt and tossed it across the room.

“Kids and Teenagers aren’t as innocent as you think they are anymore.”

Sophie stopped at the button on her jeans when she felt Bunny’s arms wrap around her waist. Her eyes narrowed when she felt his lips against her neck.  They were incredibly warm. Her face flushed a shade brighter as she slid her hands over his.

“Tell me something, Aster.” she said softly.

“Anything you want.” Bunny answered against perfect, white skin.

“It has been dreadfully long since you’ve had anyone to love, hasn’t it?”

Bunny put his chin on her shoulder for a moment before nodding and nuzzling her neck again.

“A long time, yes.”

“I’m sorry I am not exactly the best replacement.” Sophie offered softly.  “I know you’d probably prefer one of your own kind as opposed to a snotty little kid that drives you crazy.”

Bunny leaned back and turned Sophie so she was facing him again.  He shook his head adamantly and frowned.

“You aren’t a replacement for anything I had before, Sophie.” he said firmly. “And I _love you_ because you are a snotty kid that drives me crazy.”

Sophie smiled sweetly.

“You are a true gentleman, Aster.” she said gently. “I should make a conscious effort to be a better lady.”

Bunny smiled back at her when she turned away and kicked her jeans to the floor.  He stood and helped her pull the covers back on her bed.  He waited until she was buried beneath them before daring to sit next to her again.

He had been an idiot for allowing himself to move forward on her the first time.  When you hadn’t had something in forever you forget what it tastes like.  You forget what it looks like. You forget how it smells and what it _feels_ like.  When it comes back to you it is like an alcoholic getting the drink after a century.

It is an instant return to those things you had forgotten you missed.

Sophie sneezed a third time.  She groaned and buried her face in her pillow.

“Fucking weather!”

“That’s what I say.”

Sophie turned so she could face Bunny.  She looked up at him curiously as he brushed the hair away from her face.

“How long can you stay like that?”

“As long as I want.” Bunny answered. “It isn’t restricted by time.”

“That’s kind of cool.” Sophie murmured, closing her eyes. 

She opened them again and frowned.

“You aren’t leaving, right?”

Bunny smiled and shook his head.

“No.”

“You promise?”

“I promise.”

Sophie accepted this answer and curled into Bunny’s side while his fingers continued to run through her hair.  She closed her eyes and clutched his shirt in one of her hands to make sure the Guardian did as he promised.

“I love you, Aster. I really do. I promise I’ll do my best to take care of you.”

Bunny was surprised when Sophie murmured against his side and began to drift off to sleep.  He gently pulled her body closer to his.

“I love you, Easter Lily.” he answered softly. “I know you will.  Of that I have no doubt.”

He continued to run his fingers through Sophie’s hair long after she fell asleep.  His eyes drifted to the window.  Under the moonlight, the gold and blue comet was getting closer to Earth.

“Now it’s your turn, piker.” he said softly. “I know there’s nothin’ that could happen to that kid and nothin’ that kid could do to make you hate him.  Now is the time to prove it.”

Bunny slowly turned back to Sophie and monitored her fever while she slept.

His eyes narrowed.

“Don’t let that bastard take what’s rightfully yours away from you.”

 


	11. Water Like Ice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay. Endometriosis treatment basically puts my body into a forced menopause. And it really. . .really sucks. My energy is hard to keep up some days. :)
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
> Yours,  
> Six

“Be careful!  Stay away from that awful pond!  The ice isn’t as thick this year!”

“We know, Mom!”

Sophie sighed and tugged her hat over her head as her mother called from the kitchen.  She frowned and wrapped a scarf around her face.  Her fever had broken by morning, but Bunny had been hovering over her all day and she could tell he was worried.  She figured she would play it safe.

“Are you comin’ or not, Jamie!?” she called up the stairs.

Bunny stood in his human form next to Sophie.  His arms were crossed and his eyes were closed. He was trying to concentrate.  If it had gotten as bad as the Death Flare then he should be able to sense that.

“Sorry, Sophie.  I had to grab something.”

Jamie came down the stairs in a dark blue, long sleeved shirt that looked two sizes too big on him.  His jeans barely hung onto his hips.  His face looked paler and his eyes were sunken further. He smiled and grabbed his coat from the hook.

“You look like you caught a cold.” he said sympathetically.

“I had a fever last night.” Sophie admitted through her scarf.

She pulled her mittens on to her hands.

“I am just being cautious.”

“Look at whose being all grown up now?”

Jamie laughed when Sophie shoved him.

“Easter Lily, I cannot see or feel him at all. I cannot even feel the darkness that should be emanating from him.”

Sophie nodded silently when Bunny spoke softly behind her.  Her gut twisted sharply and she wished she could reach around and grab his hand.  She did not want to upset her brother any more than he was already.  She pulled the door open and walked out onto the porch. 

Jamie followed her and shut the door behind him.  His demeanor was calm despite the circumstances.  Perhaps it was just the resolution of a long period of suffering.  He knew it would finally be over.  It was terrible he was using his sister to achieve that peace, but if Jack did come back, he’d want someone to tell him the truth.

He hadn’t stopped believing.  He still believed to the point it made him sick.  He just couldn’t look the Guardian in the eye without feeling an unbearable sense of shame.

“Hey, you didn’t bring your flashlight this year.” Jamie noted as they started walking toward the group of trees near their home.

Sophie shook her head and pointed up at the Moon.

“It’s a Full Moon, see?”

Jamie looked up, startled.

“That’s odd.”

“Why?” Sophie asked, kicking a chunk of snow with her boot.

“Because the Full Moon isn’t for another week.” Jamie answered strangely.

Bunny felt like he was hearing half of a conversation.  He stopped beside Sophie when she stopped moving.  He winced.

“What did he say?”

“How do _you_ know the Full Moon should be next week?” Sophie asked aloud for Bunny’s benefit.

Jamie grinned.

“Because it’s on the calendar. . .and I am a Science Major?” he answered.

Sophie started following him again and stuck out her tongue.

“I’m a _girl_ , Jamie.” she answered back. “I don’t have time for calendars telling me about what shape the Moon is going to be any given week.”

Bunny frowned and looked up at the Moon.  It was brighter than normal, too.  Jamie was right.  This was abnormal.  The comet in the atmosphere was almost to Earth’s gravitational pull.

“Sandy, you gotta move faster.  Tell him to go ahead if you have to, mate!” he hissed.

He silently followed behind Sophie as she followed her brother through woods he had memorised.  The jagged paths were worn in from his constant use.  No one knew the trails better than Jamie Bennett or Jack Frost.

They’d been the ones that had made them.

“You okay, Sophie?” Jamie asked, looking back at his sister climbing over a particularly large rock.

Sophie nodded.

“I’m fine.” she answered. “I’m just small.”

Bunny made a noise in his throat and carefully boosted her up so she didn’t have to claw through the snow.  He did it as nonchalantly as he could to keep attention on Sophie and not him.  He still could not feel anything.

He started when a deep, cold chill raced through the woods.  He looked around trying to figure out where it was.

“It’s in the atmosphere. . .right above us.” Sophie breathed.  “He is moving like a freakin’ bullet.”

Bunny smiled when Sophie caught up to Jamie and he followed.

Sophie was getting the hang of the power of belief and what it could do. 

“And I thought you hadn’t been payin’ attention to those lessons.” he said aloud.

Sophie smirked at him.

“Riiiiiight.” she answered softly.

She turned back around and squinted when she saw the gold and blue separate in the sky above.  The gold dispersed over the entire area in a display that was magnificent to the naked eye.  The blue was barreling toward the pond like a lit fuse.  The Moon became a shade brighter.

Jamie winced and brought his hand up to shield his eyes.

“What in the world is going on with the Moon tonight?”

Sophie tilted her head.

“What do you mean?” she asked, playing stupid.

Jamie looked at her, confused.

“You didn’t notice that it got brighter all of a sudden?” he asked.

Sophie continued and shrugged.

“Nope.  I didn’t see it get brighter.  Did you?”

“It is practically blinding, Sophie.” Jamie answered.

“Looks like the Moon to me, Jamie.” Sophie said pushing past her brother.  “Maybe your eyes are worn out from all that studying.”

Jamie lowered his hand and felt a strange chill run down his spine.  He turned around when the snow swirled behind him.  He swore it was whispering.

_Have I finally snapped the tether?_

“Hey!  The pond is like, still way ahead, Jamie!”

Sophie’s voice called him back to himself.  He turned around quickly and caught up with his sister.  The unnerving feeling did not go away and the Moon only got incessantly brighter.

They were silent for the rest of the trip.  When they made it to the clearing the Moon’s reflection on the icy pond was intense.  Snow crunched under Sophie’s boots as she stood next to the edge.

“Mom says the ice is thin this year, so be careful.” Sophie said aloud.

She was starting to tremble inside her coat.  She buried her face deeper into her scarf when her stomach turned.  Her heart began to hurt when Jamie stood beside her, mesmorised by something out on the pond.

“You really. . .don’t see anything strange, Sophie?” Jamie breathed watching the bright beam of moonlight strike the center of the pond.

“I really don’t, Jamie.” Sophie choked out.  “If I didn’t know better, I’d say _you_ were the one getting sick.”

Jamie’s eyes widened when a bright cloud of what appeared to be stardust spread out across the ice.  He felt his feet moving automatically when an incredibly tall being stood in the center of the pond staring up at the brightness of the Moon.

At least, that’s what it looked like it was staring at.

“Jamie!? WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?”

Bunny held Sophie back when Jamie started making his way across the ice.  He could not see or feel anything, but knew something was happening.  The Moon was too bright.

He hissed.

“Moon.”

Sophie looked up at him, terrified.

“You mean. . . _the_ Moon!?”

Bunny glared and nodded silently.

“That’s why the Death Flare went up.” he said spitefully. “Jamie may have wanted to attempt suicide, but not even Moon is that cruel.”

Sophie turned back to the pond when she heard a deep groan across the ice.  She heard it cracking under her brother’s weight.  She shook her head again.

“JAMIE!?”

Jamie stopped about a foot from the tall, white being staring at the Moon.  He looked up at it and shook his head.

“Who are you?” he asked softly. “I can see you. . .so you aren’t a Guardian.”

Moon turned around and smiled down at Jamie.  His eyes were bright against the dark indigo of the night.  In his hand was an elegantly crafted staff made of white.  There was a quartz sphere at the top reflecting the moonlight into rainbow coloured light that skittered across the ice.

“You must be Jamie.”

Jamie slowly nodded.

“I am.”

Moon nodded.

“My priest has caused some trouble for you this past year.  I felt I should explain before it got too far out of hand.”

Jamie shook his head.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. . .”

“You are a clever boy.” Moon said softly. “You knew that the Moon could not be this bright at this time of the month.  What other reason would the Man in the Moon have for coming to Earth on the Winter Solstice?”

Jamie trembled.

“ _You’re_ the Man in the Moon?” he asked.

Moon smiled.

“Guilty as charged.” he answered. “I am the Guardian of Night.  The trouble with that is that those of us that serve the night often become quite jealous of other Guardians of more pleasant things.”

Jamie’s eyes darted around before returning to the calm, white face staring at him almost humourously.

“The night. . .meaning, the dark.” he said softly.

“See? You are clever.” Moon said nodding.  “I am not your run of the mill Guardian.  My domain is not that of Earth, but that of the Moon. Since the Moon is connected to Planet Earth, it is my responsibility, as it is for all beings of the Moon, to protect the Guardians and spirits of Earth.

“My Guardians have served me faithfully over many years.  However, I always reached for more than I deserved.”

“I don’t understand.  What does this. . .have to do. . .with me!?” Jamie asked, confused.

Moon gestured to the silver wrapped around Jamie’s hand.

“I believe that you made this for my priest. . .my Guardian of Winter. . .when the Night is longer and the Moon is brighter than the Sun. . .it is out _longer_ than the Sun. . .”

The snowflake charm fell out of Jamie’s hand.  It dangled in the moonlight, the sapphire casting blue flashes across the ice.  Jamie’s heart started to race when he started to shake.

“Jack. . .is _your_ Guardian?”

Moon smiled.

“They are all my Guardians. . .but Jack Frost represents me as my priest.  He serves my interests on Earth in my stead.  Understand, Jamie Bennett. . .I went through four Guardians of Winter before him.  I waited for centuries before telling him what his purpose was.

“There was a good reason for this.”

Jamie shook his head.

“Four?”

“Serving me is not easy.” Moon said softly. “My first four had their hearts broken or could not take the stress of being the Guardians of Winter.  Winter is associated with desolation and darkness.  The Winter is not usually a favourite.

“In Jack Frost I underestimated his dedication to his task.  I underestimated his investment in the _children_ he interacted with on a daily basis.  By the time I realised what was happening between _you_ and Jack, I could not stop this event from happening.

“If I had, Jack’s heart would have become corrupted by the darkness and he would either turn like my brother, Pitch, or he would die like the others.  I am quite fond of Jack Frost.  I would hate to lose the best Guardian of Winter I have ever had because I had neglected to take him seriously.”

Jamie had to put a hand against his chest when a sharp pain echoed from his heart to his head. He winced and tried to keep his vision focused.  It was becoming very hard to see anything.

“Winter has _never_ bothered me!” he said painfully. “Jack. . .never bothered me. . .he meant. . .everything to me!!”

“He does not mean anything to you now?” Moon asked curiously.

Tears started sliding down Jamie’s face before he could stop them.  He thought he could hear Sophie screaming his name from somewhere.  He stared at the taller figure, humiliated.

“Jack. . .means. . .everything to me. . . _always_.”

“You speak in the past tense. . .as in gone now.” Moon commented. “If you still love him, why give him up?”

Jamie trembled harder.

“What. . .happened. . .I cannot _BE_ with him!  I cannot be _HIS_ priest anymore!  If I cannot have Jack, then why. . .WHY WOULD I CONTINUE?”

A horrible groan vibrated beneath Jamie’s feet.  The light was getting to be too bright.  He had to lift one of his hands to shield his eyes.

“Has Jack told you this himself?”

Jamie lowered his arm and looked at Moon.  He could see the soft, gentle way in which the being stared at him.  The smile was kind.  He could hear his heartbeat.

“No.” he whispered. “I guess. . .I. . .was the one. . .”

Jamie’s voice trailed off when Moon laughed softly.

“It is only natural to feel this way about such a terrible event in your life.” Moon said gently. “It will require time to heal; but what better way is there to heal than with those you love the most?”

“My sister. . .she said the same thing.” Jamie breathed.

“She is a clever girl. . .your family has a history of clever people.”

Jamie looked at Moon.

“What?”

Moon nodded.

“North favoured one of your ancestors years ago, though the memory may be vague to him now. Tooth had a child from your family that she watched over well through adulthood.  Sandy even enjoyed visiting one of your family members until their dying day because their imagination was so pure and wild. Now, I have my Guardians of Winter and Spring taking two in the same time period.

“They both have important roles to play.”

“I don’t understand.”

Jamie winced.

None of this made sense.  The pain in his chest was turning into a deeply rooted burn.  He shook harder and tried to keep his eyes on Moon. Sophie’s voice was at a fever pitch.

“Sophie will help correct the mistake I made for letting Pitch do what he wanted the first time.” Moon answered softly. “She will begin to give back to Aster Bunnymund that which I stole.  And _you_. . .”

Moon looked back at the ever growing light of his domain.  He smiled.

“. . .you have a place much better than any priest or priestess beside my Winter Guardian.”

An intense cold started to wash over Jamie as the light grew to an unbearable brightness. He tried to block it out so he could see Moon for a moment longer.  None of this made any sense!

“WHAT PLACE!?”

Moon bent down and blocked the light out of Jamie’s eyes.  He stared at him intently and smiled, his eyes a glowing white.  He gently touched Jamie’s forehead.

“Jack’s downfall is that he carries too much of one thing and not the other.” Moon whispered. “I neglected this need in my other Guardians.  If I allow the dark to grow darker, I lose Jack; but if the light gets too intense, he loses you.

“I have to restore the balance by dimming my priest’s light just a little bit more.

“You are going to give me the chance to do just that.  You are going to help me save Jack Frost, Jamie Bennett.”

Jamie felt the cold wash over his head.  There was a thunderous roar from beneath him. It felt like he was falling.  Moon was getting farther away.  He desperately reached.

_No.  No, please don’t go. . ._

Moon smiled.

“You have the wonderful privilege of becoming a _part of Jack_.” he said softly. “You are a piece of him.  That means that no matter what you go through, where you are, how things turn out, you will always have that to rely on. . .you will always have each other.

“In the end, that is all we can hold onto. . .each other.

“Trust in my Guardians, Jamie.  Trust in Jack.  He is not so far gone that he cannot comprehend what was done to you has hurt you terribly.”

Jamie’s eyes narrowed.  He felt tears burn beneath them as he sank farther.  He couldn’t breathe. The cold was paralysing.

_Jack. . .knew?_

“Not at first. . .but he is clever like you.  He knew where to go to get the answers he did not have.” Moon answered, standing upright.  “He has what he needs from _me_.  It’s up to _you_ , Jamie.

“You never stopped believing in us. . .or them. . .you only wanted to protect them from something you thought made you less of a wonderful human in their eyes.”

Moon knelt down and touched Jamie’s outstretched hand.

“Take it from someone who knows that pain all too well. . .it only makes you stronger, Jamie Bennett. . .and it only binds you closer to the Guardians that love you.  In your case it is the Guardian that loves you _most_.”

Jamie smiled, his eyes closing out the bright light.  He shook his head and held onto the charm he’d made for Jack until blood started to fall from his hand.

_I am. . .not worthless!?_

“Far from it.” Moon whispered.  “And I have the Guardian of Winter to prove it.

“Best of luck to you, Jamie.”


	12. Ice Like Water Like Air

Sophie was thrashing against Bunny by the time the moonlight started to fade.  Jamie had fallen through the ice almost two minutes ago.  Nothing had happened or changed.  He hadn’t come back to the surface.

“LET ME GO!” she cried.  “HE’S GOING TO FUCKING DROWN!”

Bunny tilted his head back to avoid a flailing fist when a loud bang resounded through the trees.  He looked up when Sandy perched himself on a tree branch above him.  He turned the other way and saw North hovering above the canopy.

“You two got here bloody fast!” he said, avoiding another fist.

Sandy smiled. He shrugged his shoulders and gestured to the incredible ball of blue fire that was plummeting toward the center of the lake.

“Bloody hell. . .”

Sophie stopped screaming when Bunny hauled her around and held her against his chest.  His weapon appeared in his off hand and he slammed it into the snow for a shield.  He bowed over Sophie.

“Hold onto me, Easter Lily.”

Sophie did as she was told.  She held onto the Guardian for dear life.  She heard the roaring sound of thunder and lightning as the snow swirled around the clearing ominously. She cried out when the ground shook and the sound of shattering glass echoed through the air.

Bunny ground his teeth together and held the boomerang steady while sharp, indigo ice shards slammed into it.  They shot into the ground and the trees haphazardly.  Cold, icy water came up into the air like a geyser.

Like that, the moment was over.

Bunny hesitantly stood up and looked over his weapon.  He noted the damage and saw that the pond had lost a good foot of water.  Ice covered the entire clearing and the water had changed to a choppy, inky indigo.

He about tipped over when the ground shook a second time and the rumbling came up from the Earth.

Sandy smiled from his tree, umbrella in his hand.  He waved to North and nodded excitedly.

Bunny covered Sophie again when another, large geyser shot up into the air from the pond.  Another foot of water crashed down into the clearing.  The snow was covered in resilient coloured ice as frost shot across it and up the trees.

He waited until the shaking had stopped before standing up again.  His eyes were wide with shock.

“Bunny. . .what is it!?” Sophie cried softly. “What do you see!?”

When he didn’t answer her, she wiggled free of his grasp and stood up on her own.  She gasped and put her mittens over her mouth. Her eyes were wide in her face.

“Jamie!”

Jack Frost stood in the air stock still.  His staff was secured to his back and had indigo blue ice running down the crook.  Darker shades of frost covered the handle and spread across his hoodie.  His hoodie had become a dark indigo blue and a bright, circular sapphire was in the center of his forehead.

His eyes were still closed and he was trying to catch his breath.  His skin was a translucent white and his hair was streaked with a light blue.  His leggings were black and covered with frost.  Suspended in his arms, head hanging over one, legs over the other was his human, Jamie.

Sophie had to make a conscious effort to breathe.  She watched the Guardian for a moment without understanding.  She was so caught up in it that she almost didn’t hear Bunny beside her.

“Once in a Blue Moon.”

Sophie turned to Bunny when the Spring Guardian hoisted his boomerang out of the snow.  She shook her head.

“What?”

Bunny smiled faintly.

“The Blue Moon is typically the Harvest Moon. . .but I see MiM’s bending the rules a little bit.”

Sophie still looked horribly confused.

Bunny laughed softly.

“Just. . .watch.” he said finally.

Sophie turned back to Jack and gasped when he opened his eyes.

“They’re. . .dark blue!”

Sandy clapped from his tree when a halo of light surrounded the Winter Guardian’s dark irises.  He watched Jack carefully land on the surface of the pond and freeze it solid.  The indigo coloured ice shot out clear to the shore.  As it did, frost quickly followed over it.

Sophie shook her head when Jack carefully set Jamie against the ice.  She saw the silver chain in her brother’s hand.  She gasped.

“That’s the gift Jamie made for Jack!” she said softly. “He didn’t think. . .I knew about it. . .but I heard so many people in his class talking about how good it was. . .I actually asked if I could see it. . .and the teacher showed me. . .”

Bunny nodded.

“Jamie is held in higher regard than the position he wanted.” he answered gently. 

Sophie smiled sweetly.

“Of course. . .Blue Moon. . .indigo. . .dark blue. . .this is. . .Jack Frost on steroids.”

Bunny nodded again.

“It is Jamie’s job to protect that darker part of Jack Frost now.”

Sophie turned back to where Jack was kneeling beside Jamie. She put her arms behind her back and waited.  She was a sucker for a good love story.


	13. Once In A Blue Moon

Jack hadn’t raced so fast or so hard in his life.  If Sandy hadn’t been there to get him through Earth’s atmosphere he was pretty sure he would have disintegrated in it.  He felt Jamie slipping away before he was close enough to do anything to stop it.

“That’s insulting, Jamie.” he breathed, pushing Jamie’s hair out of his face. “You would drown yourself in the same place I was drowned?  Surely you could have come up with something more creative.”

Jack smiled.

He’d never been so happy to see a human in all his life.  While it was a far cry from what he had looked like when he had last seen him, Jamie was still undeniably beautiful.  To see him reaching out toward him when he’d fallen through the ice was probably the most electric feeling the Guardian had, had in an entire year.

Being able to _touch_ Jamie again awakened something much stronger in him than anything he’d felt in the last 320 years.  The power that always coursed through him during the Solstice had changed dramatically.  Jack couldn’t explain it and he didn’t care.

He had Jamie.

That’s all he ever wanted.

“You’ve scared us long enough, Jamie.”

A brilliant flurry of snow and frost shot out from beneath Jack when he pressed his lips against Jamie’s.  He felt the strength he had gathered and saved all year flow from his body to the one beneath him.  He only pulled away when the lips pressed against his started to warm and fingers reached toward him.

Jack looked down into the narrow, brown eyes looking up at him.  He smiled, relieved, when Jamie reached up and put his hand against his face.  He laughed a little when tears filled his eyes before drifting away.

“Fuck, you ever do that again, Jamie. . .I’ll kill you myself.”

Jamie put his arm around the Guardian when Jack lifted him up and held him tightly.  He trembled and dug his fingertips into his lover’s back.  Air, cold and sweet, moved in and out of his lungs. He smiled weakly when Jack leaned him back and held his face between his palms.

Jack put his forehead against Jamie’s and closed his eyes.  He tried to catch his breath. Between them the air was warm and the snow crystals melted.  The Guardian had never missed warmth like the warmth he shared with this human.  He laughed softly again and trembled.

“I could never. . .EVER. . .hate you, Jamie Bennett.” Jack whispered. “Nothing that anyone could do or _you_ could do could make me turn you away.  You’re mine.  Do you understand that now?  You are _mine_.”

Jamie’s eyes filled with tears as he nodded slowly.

“I’m still. . .sorry.” he rasped, his voice weak.

Jack shook his head violently and leaned Jamie back so he could look at him.

“No.” he said firmly. “Never be sorry for something _someone else did to you_.”

Jamie winced.

“You . . . knew . . .?”

Jack shook his head again.

“I didn’t, Jamie!” he breathed painfully. “One minute I could see and feel you, the next minute you were gone!  I. . .I didn’t know what had happened!  I thought I must have done something, hurt you in some way!”

Jamie winced.

“How. . .”

“Your nightmares. . .” Jack whispered. “. . .I went to Pitch to get your nightmares.  That’s how I knew you would do this, you idiot!”

Jamie smiled and shook his head.

“I am an idiot!” he cried softly. “And I could. . .could have. . .been more creative.”

Jack grinned and nodded.

“You’re forgiven.”

Jamie put his hand over Jack’s when the Guardian passionately kissed him.  The wonderful cold he had missed filled him from head to toe.  The pain that had plagued him for months finally faded and dissipated.

When they parted, Jamie’s eyes were clearer and the dark circles were gone.  His skin had regained most of its colour and his cheeks were a healthy red.  He stared at Jack curiously.

“Your eyes are darker.”

His voice sounded like it used to before he’d fallen under the ice.

Jack smiled.

“That’s your doing.” he answered. “The Solstice increases my powers. . .and all I was focused on this year was you.”

The Guardian lifted the necklace with the charm on it.

“This is how I found you.”

Jamie smiled back.

“I meant to give it to you last year.” he said softly. “I worked my ass off on it.”

“I can tell.” Jack responded.

He grinned.

“You mean more to me than any priest or priestess, Jamie.  You are a _part_ of me.  The moment you saw me and I was real to you. . .”

Jack shook his head.

“I wasn’t letting you go anywhere.”

Jamie noticed the blue sapphire between Jack’s eyes.  He smiled again.  It looked like the Moon had just before he’d lost consciousness.

“Once in a Blue Moon. . .”

Jack nodded.

“You and I don’t happen very often from what I’ve heard.” he said softly.  “I guess Moon was tired of having to replace Winter Guardians. . .he decided to just give me what I wanted.”

Jamie smiled lopsidedly.

“And what is it that Jack Frost wanted?”

Jack humoured him.  He lifted Jamie’s face toward his.

“I wanted _you_ , Jamie.  All of you. . .with me for as long as I have to endure this horrible job that used to be horrible until I met you.”

Jamie nodded, hand tightening over Jack’s.

“I’m still yours if you want me that badly.”

“You have no idea how badly I want you.”

Jamie dug his fingernails into Jack’s hand when the Guardian kissed him again.  Each time their lips met more of what had pained and hurt him disappeared.  More of what he had come to love about the Guardian of Winter came back to him instead.

“No more of this shit.” Jack whispered against Jamie’s lips.  “Don’t ever. . .EVER. . .do this again, Jamie.  If I hadn’t. . .been here to save you. . .”

Jamie’s arms came up around the Guardian when Jack shuddered.  He shook his head and held onto Jack tighter.

“Never again.” he breathed into the dark blue hoodie. “I won’t try to hide from you or try to drown myself ever again.”

Jack held Jamie tightly and nodded.

“You’d better not.”

Jamie leaned back and lifted the necklace in his hand.  He offered it to Jack.

“It is long overdue.” he mused. “I guess I am glad I spent so much time on it.”

Jack grinned and undid the clasp.  Frost skirted over the silver and the charm as he secured it around his neck.  The stone shimmered like the one that was placed on his forehead.

“You could have made it out of tin foil and I still would have loved it.” he said gently.

Jamie smiled back.

“I missed you, Jack.”

“I missed you, too, Jamie.”

“I never stopped believing. . .please believe _me_ when I say that. . .I didn’t give up on you!”

Jack shook his head and pressed his forehead to Jamie’s again.  He quieted his lover and trembled.

“I believe you.” he whispered. “I’d never doubt you, Jamie. . .even when I couldn’t figure out what it was, I knew it had to have been _something_.  I am dim, not dumb.”

“You’re neither.” Jamie replied, hoarsely, tears clouding his eyes.

Jack smiled.

“It won’t happen again.”

He pointed to the charm.

“Remember how I said my appearance was your fault?”

Jamie nodded.

“Turns out I needed a dark side of my own. . .” Jack said aloud. “. . .I guess I believe in the innocence of everyone. . .when the world isn’t like that anymore.  When you were hurt and I lost you, I finally got to see what that pain felt like.

“It consumed me.  That is why none of the other Guardians could find me.  Moon had to physically come down here to look for me.  He found me half dark beneath a snowdrift I’d barricaded myself in after you didn’t come for the Solstice.  From that point on, everything just started draining from me.

“My light started to dim, my colour faded out of my eyes and clothes and the Ice Staff froze over so that when I used it the snow and frost it created was ugly and sharp instead of beautiful.  I was allowing the feelings of pain, sorrow and anger cloud what was the best in my heart.

“When I saw this charm just. . .sinking. . .I knew that it couldn’t have gotten here on its own. By the time I’d realised you must have brought it here, your defences were down. . .and there you were!  The moment I grabbed you, this thing just. . .exploded.”

Jamie was surprised.

“It did?”

Jack nodded.

“All of the darkness. . .all of that pain and suffering. . .what you went through, what I went through and what we went through together is in here.  That power is locked away now.  But, you showed me, Jamie.  You showed me how precious and valuable you are to me.

“You helped me realise that dark feelings lead to darker actions.  Those actions end up hurting others. . .even the ones we love most.  It is what gave me the courage to go to Pitch and get the whole story before I came back here.

“Sure, I wanted to rip apart the bastards that had done that to you. . .and had I not been so devastated by the fact _you_ were the one apologising at the end of it all, I think I may have actually acted on those feelings of hate.  But to hear you apologising to _ME_ was too much for me to bear.

“I realised. . .realised how important you were. . .how much I _needed_ you.

“You are the protector of my heart. . .my shadow. . .my everything.  You are what keeps me from falling prey to the darkness that tends to follow me everywhere. . .”

Jamie remembered what Moon had said to him and smiled faintly.

He nodded slowly.

“Then. . .if it had to happen. . .I am glad that it brought us together in the end.”

Jamie put his hands against Jack’s face when the Guardian put his forehead against his.  He was finally whole again.  There was peace.

He smiled again.

“Is this change permanent?”

Jack laughed. 

“Some of it, yeah.” he admitted. “I think I am going to have the darker look from now on. . .but the Blue Moon will only appear on the Solstice.”

He pointed to the stone on his forehead and the crook on his back.

“Special occasion kind of thing.” he added. “Other than that, I am the same as I was before.”

They looked up when a beam of light came from the Moon and struck the middle of the pond.  From the bright light dropped a small, circular piece of metal.  When it had struck the ice, the light faded.

_This is a token of my appreciation, Jamie Bennett.  As yours protects my Guardian, this shall protect you.  Thank you very much for taking care of him for me.  You will find that this Mark has a very special talent._

_It will not only tell other Guardians and spirits across the cosmos that you belong to a Guardian of Earth, but it may open the minds of those who still carry that tiny bit of hope in their hearts._

Jack picked the object up when Jamie heard the voice echo between his ears.  He leaned into Jack’s body, exhausted.

“What is it, Jack?”

“It’s for you.” Jack answered handing it to Jamie.  “I guess Moon is pretty pleased with the turn of events.  It is from him.”

Jamie took the small, circular piece of metal and looked at it curiously. A blue enameled background housed a golden crescent moon that shimmered in the light.  Starlight twinkled in the blue parts when he stared at it.

He smiled.

“I am pretty sure I am going to lose this or it is going to get stolen from me.”

Jack laughed.

“I can fix that.”

Jack took the Mark back from Jamie and held it in his hand.  He carefully placed it between his lover’s collarbones and concentrated.

Jamie felt the frost circle his neck as the Mark got several sizes smaller.  Strong, silver links formed beneath the frost as it melted against his skin.  When it was secured around his neck Jack opened his eyes and admired his work.

“How about that?  Think you can manage to keep a hold of that?”

Jamie nodded.

“That’s much more manageable.” he answered.

Jack smiled back at him.

He didn’t know how much he could miss one person.  His whole world had crashed from underneath him when Jamie disappeared.  To see and touch him again made him never want to let him go.

“JAMIE! JACK!”


	14. Reunion

Sophie half slid, half dove into her brother and Jack.  She wrapped her arms around them and started crying again.  She hit them with enough force to push them a few inches from where they’d been sitting.

“Sophie. . .”

“DON’T YOU EVER DO THAT AGAIN!” Sophie cried, punching her brother sharply in the stomach.  “WHAT WERE YOU THINKING DOING THAT!?”

Jack smiled sympathetically when Jamie made a dissenting remark and looked at Sophie painfully.  He looked at the younger Bennett and shook his head.

“It wasn’t his fault.”

“Don’t you stand up for him, Jack, or I will punch _you_ next!” Sophie warned.

“It’s the truth!” Jack laughed. “Moon is pretty hard to ignore when he puts on a show.”

Sophie was going to fire another insult but held back.  She looked at Jamie painfully.

“Was that the only reason, Jamie?” she asked aloud. “Because you saw the Man in the Moon?”

“Honestly,” Jamie answered softly, “it is.”

His eyes narrowed.

“I may have had other intentions before, but that all changed when. . .I saw him. . .”

He looked at his sister indignantly.

“Could you see him that whole time, Sophie!?”

“I wasn’t allowed to interfere!” Sophie whined.  “Do you think I WANTED TO DO THAT!?”

“Speaking of interfering, how did you get away from your shadow?” Jack asked looking around curiously. “I am surprised he let you get this far without him.”

“She punched me, the piker.” 

Sophie winced and shrank back into her coat when Bunny adjusted his nose and frowned from behind her. 

“She has a mean right hook.”

Jamie smiled faintly.

“You probably should be grateful you weren’t in your Pooka form.” he said softly. “That would have hurt worse.”

Sophie crossed her arms and stuck her tongue out.

“I have felt positively DREADFUL since you’ve come home, Jamie.  I wasn’t about to just _stand around_ now that everything’s okay again.”

She cried out when a tiny, green blur whizzed in front of her and around the tiny group on the ice.  Jamie didn’t mind the attention for once when the tiny hummingbird like creature slowed down and darted in front of his face before going to Jack and pulling at his hood.

Jack grinned.

“So, someone _did_ miss me!”

The tiny creature made a series of disappointed chatters and noises while directing its tiny hands around all over the place.  The red on her chest puffed out and she frowned when Jack laughed at her.

“Oy! You plan on staying on ice all night!? He’ll freeze before you get the chance to catch up, Jack!”

North’s voice boomed across the clearing from where he’d come to stand beside Sandy.

Jack smiled faintly and shook his head.  He put his lips against Jamie’s forehead.

“You won’t freeze.” he said softly.  “Not as long as you’re with me.”

“He won’t, but the rest of us will. . .and _she_ is already sick.”

Sophie cried out a second time when Bunny hauled her up and over his shoulder.

“I can walk!” she sputtered, embarrassed. “I am FINE!”

“You get your brother for the rest of break.” Bunny said gently. “Jack hasn’t seen him in over a year.  Play nice, love.”

Sophie sighed and put her chin in her hands.  She smiled anyway when the Winter Guardian pulled Jamie closer.  Her blue eyes were narrow above her scarf.

“Yeah, I know.” she said softly. “I just. . .am. . .really relieved.”

“You aren’t the only one, Sophie.”

“North!”

North hugged the younger Bennett and grinned. 

“You get much taller and you won’t be able to hide from me anymore!” he said jovially. “Is great news about your brother, yes?  We did okay this time.”

“I didn’t have a doubt.” Sophie said, smiling.

North looked at Bunny curiously, smile still on his face.

“Bunny, is you!?  I haven’t seen you like that in a long time, friend.”

Bunny frowned and started pulling the ice out of his weapon.

“I haven’t had an Easter Lily in a long time, mate.” he answered back.  “I have one, now. . .and she’s human.”

North winked at Sophie.

“That is record time, I think.” he whispered to her.  “Even in his Prime he was hard to sway.”

Sophie smiled and shook her head silently.

It hadn’t taken much at all, in her opinion.  She’d only been herself the entire time.  If that had caused something to change in her Guardian, then that was because he _wanted_ to change.

She was honest when she had said she liked Bunny just the way he was when she first met him.

“Easy.”

Jack helped Jamie back to solid ground and kept him upright with one of Jamie’s arms over his shoulder.  One of the Guardian’s arms was securely fastened around his waist.  He frowned.

“You are skinnier than I am!”

Jamie nodded slowly.

“I wasn’t lying when I said finals took a lot out of me.” he murmured. “Plus, what college kid eats great when they go to college anyway?”

“I hear it is the other way around.” Jack answered. “They usually _gain_ weight.  Your clothes don’t even fit you anymore.”

“It’s like he’s wearing a circus tent, isn’t it?” Sophie asked honestly.

Jamie smiled faintly.

“Okay, thank you!” he interrupted. “I get it. . .thank you. . .”

Jack held him tighter when he stumbled on his feet.  He looked up when he heard beating wings approaching the clearing. He lifted an eyebrow.

“What the. . .”

The tiny fairy in his hood waved ecstatically when a larger, emerald blur swept into Jack and Jamie and nearly knocked them back onto the ice.

“Jack! JAMIE! Oh! Where have you been!? We’ve been so worried! I’ve had the little Tooth’s looking EVERYWHERE!”

An over-excited chattering accompanied the crushing embrace.  Feathers fluffed up happily as the Tooth Fairy leaned back and put her hands together in front of her.  She smiled exuberantly.

“Where on Earth did you go, Jack!?”

“I wasn’t on Earth.” Jack answered, making sure Jamie hadn’t had the wind knocked out of him. “I was on the Moon.”

Tooth gasped, excited.

“With _him_?”

Jack nodded.

“I didn’t mean to worry all of you.” he said softly. “But. . .it was probably better Moon removed me from the scene.”

North frowned.

“We were worried sick, Jack.” he answered. “Boy goes missing, then Guardian of Winter goes missing. . .causes panic. . .not just because you are Guardian, either. . .but because you both mean a lot to us.”

Jack looked at his fellow Guardians when Sandy descended from his tree branch and smiled.  He knew that they _did_ care.  It’d taken a long time to understand that, but once he had, he hadn’t forgotten it again.

“Moon was right, though.” he tried again.  “If he’d have left me here. . .I’d have only gotten worse and probably lost control.”

“That’s when you rely on the rest of us, mate.” Bunny said softly. “There’s goin’ta be one of us that’s been through it.”

Jack took this to heart.  He’d forgotten that Bunny knew exactly what it felt like to have something precious taken from you.  If anything, he was being selfish about that, too.  Bunny hadn’t given up.  He hadn’t gone on a tirade. . .and he’d lost his entire Warren.

“If Moon came for him, little he could do, Bunny.” North said gently. “For Moon to come to Earth is trying task. . .it must have worried him greatly if he came down here personally for you, Jack.”

“You could say that.” Jack murmured, looking at Jamie when his lover’s head bowed forward.  “I didn’t understand.  Just because I wasn’t alive for as long as the rest of you doesn’t mean that I shouldn’t be told what the hell is going on. . .”

Tooth winced.  Her wings fluttered quickly behind her back.

“Oh, Jack,” she said softly, “we didn’t want you to lose that spark you have.”

“That’s just it.” Jack answered. “I did.”

He looked up at the others.

“It was Sandy that figured out where I must have gone.”

North turned to the Sandman, surprised.

“You knew!?”

Sandy smiled faintly and directed his sand to indicate that North had made the comment that Jack could be felt nowhere on Earth.  He only assumed that there was one other person that could hide Jack and allow him to keep working.  Since none of the other Guardians aside from himself and one other had ever been to the Moon, he decided to take it upon himself.

North was startled by this before looking at Sandy, confused.

“What other Guardian has made the trip with you?”

“It was me.”

Bunny answered softly and threw the last icicle onto the snow ridden ground.  He frowned for a moment before shaking his head.

“MiM and I had words after the first incident with Pitch.”

North accepted this without further questioning.  There had been enough pain for his Spring Guardian at present.  He was happy that Sophie was as resilient as she was.  She would certainly keep the old man on his toes.

Everyone turned when Sophie brought her hands up to her face and sneezed loudly.

Jamie’s eyes came open slowly and he looked at his sister painfully.

“You _are_ getting sick!”

“Shuddap!” Sophie sniffled. “It’s _your_ fault, any way!  Making me worry and feel like you were going to up and kill yourself!  I swear to God you better not try anything like this again, Jamie Bennett, or I will gut you myself.”

“If I haven’t already.” Jack amended.

He quickly brought his other arm up to support Jamie’s chest when his fell forward.  There was a very sharp rasping in the human’s lungs. He shook his head.

“You were sick before you got here tonight, too, Jamie."

“Because he’s been sleeping with the window WIDE OPEN!” Sophie accused, Bunny feeling her forehead under her hat. “I am surprised Mom doesn’t make you stop that stupid shit!”

Jamie smiled faintly.  His eyes were still bright when he looked at his sister.

“Mom knows never to close my window in the winter.” he breathed. “After I threw such a fit when I saw Jack she tried to put child locks on the sash.  I had them dismantled in two days.  She gave up after that.”

Jack grinned and held Jamie tighter.

“Should return Bennetts home before parents start to worry.” North advised, smiling. “But, if you, Tooth, and you, Sandy, have a minute to spare for me, I would appreciate your presence at the Pole, yes?”

Sandy nodded peacefully and Tooth smiled back.

“Of course.” she answered. “I feel. . .terrible I couldn’t have helped more. . .I should have.”

North shook his head.

“Your work never ends!  The rest of us tend to get a break in that department.”

“That’s right! It is nearly Christmas!” Tooth exclaimed. “How on Earth did you manage to get away from the Pole without being mauled!?”

“Which is why I would appreciate your company.” North admitted sheepishly. “I may have caused a bit of. . .what is word. . . _chaos_. . .in my departure?”

Sandy chortled silently while Tooth sighed.

“Did you run them over again?” she asked.

“NO!” North said indignantly. “And if I did it was only one or two. . .not the whole sleigh team like last time.”

Tooth shook her head and turned to Jack.

“I’m glad everything’s okay.” she said softly.  “And it looks like Moon gave you a new weapon in which to defend yourself and the one you care about.”

Jack smiled when her finger touched the small, blue stone set in his forehead.  He nodded.

“He had help, I think.”

Tooth looked at him curiously until she noticed the charm on his necklace.  She gasped, excited.

“Did Jamie make this for you!?  It’s beautiful!”

Jamie smiled, his eyes closed.

“It isn’t anything. . .special. . .”

Tooth gasped again and moved to the charm on Jamie’s necklace. 

“Oh my Gosh!” she cried. “It must have been SOMETHING if Moon gave you this!  This is a special honour!  Oh my GOSH!  I am so HAPPY for you both!”

Jack made a noise in his throat when Tooth hugged them a second time.  The tinier Tooth in his hoodie chattered and waved her mistress back.

“I know, I know.” Tooth said, settling back.  “It’s just. . .It’s just that there isn’t anyone more deserving.”

She smiled warmly.

“I hope you don’t mind. . .she won’t leave for a while now that she’s found you.  She told me she would take a few days off to make sure you didn’t go anywhere else.”

Jack smiled and looked at the Tooth nestled against his neck.

He shook his head.

“I don’t mind.” he answered softly.  “After all, we’ve been through all of the darkest adventures together, right?”

The tiny fairy chirped matter of fact and nodded.

“I will be back in few days.” North said quickly. “I will be on house arrest until the Eve, I am positive at this point.  I am sure Sandy and Tooth will do their best to check in during the interim.”

Sandy nodded avidly and shook his finger at Jamie, scolding him.

Jamie smiled half-hearted.

“Finals, Sandy. . .I swear.” he breathed.  “I wasn’t doing it on purpose.”

“He’ll sleep fine.” Jack said softly. “Probably better than he has his whole life.”

North grinned.

“That’s the spirit.”

The sleigh appeared overhead and North used the trees as leverage to return to the reins.  Sandy waved and joined him.  Tooth smiled and turned to Bunny and Sophie.

“I’m glad to see you two are getting on, too.  It’s been a while since you’ve looked like that, Bunnymund.”

Bunny’s cheeks flushed a brilliant crimson.

“My Easter Lily is a human.” he repeated a second time.

Tooth clasped her hands together again and hugged Bunny tightly.

“I am even _happier_ then!” she answered.

She smiled at Sophie.

“Take good care of him, Sophie.” she said gently.

Sophie pulled down her scarf and smiled sweetly.

“Don’t worry about him.” she answered happily. “I’ll keep him busy.”

Tooth hugged her before joining the others.

“No runnin’ off, Jack!” North ordered holding the reindeer steady. “If Moon didn’t give you orders to stay put, then I am.”

“Understood!” Jack called back.

The sleigh took off in a loud crack of thunder and disappeared into the sky.  The air was left in the calm quiet that had preceded it.  The moon was still shining full in the sky and illuminating the paths through the trees.

Sophie rearranged her scarf around her face and looked at her brother, worried.

“Jamie, are you going to _make_ it back home?” she asked softly. “What am I going to tell _Mom_ and _Dad_!  She told us to stay away from the damn ice!”

Jamie mumbled something incoherent and fell harder against Jack.

Jack shook his head.

“I’ll carry him.” he answered.

Sophie sighed.

“How like him to cause trouble and then leave it to me to get us _out_ of it.”

Jack smiled sympathetically when Sophie turned and started back on the path toward home.  Bunny hauled his weapon to his back and looked at the Winter Guardian for a moment.  He finally smiled and shook his head.

“Good job, mate.” he said softly.  “Not many people get their way with MiM like that.”

“I wasn’t going to let him _have it_ any other way.” Jack answered picking Jamie up in his arms.

He looked up at the Spring Guardian.

“Just as I expect you won’t let him dissuade you from going through with marryin’ Sophie.”

Bunny smiled faintly.

“You’d be right.”

“Are you guys _COMING!?_ ” Sophie whined from the trees. “I am really cold now and I just want to go to sleep!”

Jack smiled back and followed Bunny when the Guardian turned to catch up with the younger Bennett.

Jamie’s forehead was warmer than usual against his shoulder.  He could tell his breathing was laboured.  The sharp, warm bursts of air were ragged.  He winced.

“Hang on, Jamie.” Jack said softly. “We’ll get you home and I’ll stop this before it gets any worse.”

The Tooth in his hoodie chattered nervously and leaned over to look at the human in his arms.

“He’ll be okay.” Jack said following Bunny and Sophie out of the clearing. “He has me.”

For the first time in a very long time, this statement made the Guardian of Winter feel elated and confident that his First _would_ be okay.


	15. Mark of the Moon

“Sophie! It is almost 11:30! Where in the world have you been!?”

Sophie sighed and threw her coat on the floor with her hat and scarf.  She wearily tossed her mittens on the growing pile before kicking her boots off.  She was still formulating a plan of action when her mother stopped in the hallway and made a small, surprised noise.

“Oh!  I am so sorry!  I didn’t know she was meeting with anyone else!”

Sophie stood up and looked around like her mother was crazy.

“What are you talking about, Mom?”

“The young man standing behind you?” her mother asked, curiously.

Bunny took his turn to be surprised.  He looked at Sophie while Sophie stared back at him.  She shrugged carefully and signaled she had no idea what was going on.

“Move your ass, Aster, you’re in the damn way.”

Bunny moved when Jack pushed him out of the way and carried Jamie into the house.

“Dear God! What happened!?”

Jack smiled when Jamie’s mother came forward and pressed her hands against her son’s face.

“We’re sorry they are home late.” he said aloud. “Aster and I are friends of Jamie and Sophie’s.  We go with them every year to the clearing in the woods.  It is kind of a winter tradition for us. I think Jamie was feeling unwell and got too close to the edge of the water.

“I had to pull him out of it.”

Jack was surprised when Jamie’s mother kissed the side of his face and hugged him.

“Thank you!” she said, tears in her eyes. “I. . .I tell them _every year_ to stay off of that ice.  My grandmother always told me that was how another boy died years ago. . .when they started going down there together, I just got more worried!”

Jack smiled again and shook his head.

“I don’t think Jamie did it on purpose.” he said gently. “From what I hear he’s had a rough year at school.”

Jamie’s mother was drawn up in worry when his father came in from the living room after hearing the commotion.

“What in the hell happened?” he asked worriedly.

“Jamie wasn’t feeling well either.” their mother answered. “He has a high fever.  He must have collapsed and he fell through the ice of that pond he and Sophie go to for the Solstice every year. This young man saved him!”

She turned to Jack, startled.

“I. . .am so sorry! I didn’t ask your name!”

“It’s Jack.” the Guardian answered honestly. “I’ve been friends with Jamie for a long time.  My family moved away from Burgess awhile ago. . .so I don’t get up here as often as I used to anymore.”

Mrs. Bennett smiled fondly and shook her head.

“I wish Jamie had more friends like you.” she answered. “It always worried me when he was in high school that he did not have many responsible friends.”

“Jamie’s a pretty good kid.  I don’t think you have to worry too much about him.  He only wants to make his family proud.” Jack said softly.

Mrs. Bennett smiled again, strangely comforted by Jack’s bright smile and bright, blue eyes.  She worried his parents weren’t feeding _him_ enough either.  He was as pale as Jamie had been lately.

“And who is _your_ friend, Sophie?” Mr. Bennett asked looking at Bunny curiously.

Sophie recognised the “I’m the Dad Here” tone immediately and tried to think of something practical to say.

“My apologies.  It has been a stressin’ night.” Bunny said extending his right hand. “My name is Aster.  I am an exchange student.  The family hosting me is one town over, but I met Sophie through our love of art.  I’m still rather sore she beat me in that art competition, actually.”

Mr. Bennett shook Bunny’s hand cautiously before easing back and smiling faintly.

“Our Sophie is passionate about art.” he admitted. “Australian?”

Bunny nodded.

“Must be a terrible change of weather for you.” Mr. Bennett said sympathetically.

“You have no idea, sir.” Bunny said, wincing.

“You are very well spoken for a teenager!” Mrs. Bennett said beside herself. 

“He’s not an _American_ teenager, darling.” Mr. Bennett answered humourously.

“I am a Junior.” Bunny said softly.  “And I was raised that manners were expected from you at _all_ times. . .but especially when meeting your partner’s parents.”

 Mrs. Bennett put her hand over her lips and watched her husband’s face before smiling and looking at Sophie.

“Has that what all this acting out has been about, Sophie?” she asked playfully. “Were you afraid we wouldn’t approve that you had a boyfriend?”

“No!” Sophie said loudly.

She blushed a furious crimson before jamming her hands into her hoodie pocket and looking away.

“Well. . .maybe a little. . .he’s older than I am.”

“Your father is older than I am.” Mrs. Bennett said more for her husband’s benefit than her daughter’s.  “Aster seems better rounded than a lot of the other young men I’ve seen you tangle with on a daily basis.  You are obviously taken with him.”

“She was surprised that some fight back.” Bunny replied softly.

This made Mr. Bennett smirk and he ruffled the hair on top of Sophie’s head.

“That’s my girl.” he said proudly. “Make ‘em work for it.”

“Dear, take Jamie up to his room before Jack collapses underneath him.” Mrs. Bennett said worriedly.

Jack negotiated Jamie over to his father and smiled faintly.

“Jamie weighed a lot more when I saw him last.” he said aloud. “I could blow on him and he’d fall over now.”

“See! I told you!” Mrs. Bennett said as Mr. Bennett carried Jamie upstairs.

“I hear you, dear!” Mr. Bennett sighed.

“I was just telling him that Jamie did not look the same.  That something seemed wrong.” Mrs. Bennett continued.  “Call it a mother’s intuition. . .but you just know when something isn’t right with your children.”

Jack smiled easier.  He shook his head.

“He’s got great parents.” he said softly. “He just needs to learn he doesn’t have to push _himself_ so hard.”

“Hmm.” Mrs. Bennett replied, fingertips pressed against her lips.

She quickly roused herself from thought and shook her head.

“It is so late; your parents are probably going to be worried sick.  Should I call them or take you home?  I mean, it is the least I could do for what you have done for us tonight.”

Jack grinned and shoved Bunny in the arm.

“Nah, I came with him.  My family’s the one hosting him.”

Bunny snorted and looked down at the smaller Guardian.

“Keep it up, piker, and I’ll tie you on _top_ of the car.”

Jack laughed and looked at Mrs. Bennett.

“I hope it will be okay if we check in on Jamie when he’s feeling better?”

Mrs. Bennett nodded, smiling.

“I think he would like that.” she said softly.

Jack nodded and pulled on Bunny’s shirt.

“Come on. . .before we _do_ get in trouble.”

Bunny glared at Jack threateningly before looking down at Sophie.

She smiled back at him when he kissed the side of her face and whispered in her ear.  She nodded silently.  She stood beside her mother and watched Jack bound off the porch and onto the side walk.

“It was a pleasure meeting you both.” Mrs. Bennett said kindly. “If there is anything we can do to thank you. . .”

Jack grinned.

“As long as you love Jamie for exactly who he is, I think that is payment enough.”

Mrs. Bennett was startled by this statement when Bunny politely said good night and shut the door behind him.  She stared, confused, for several seconds.

“What a strange thing to say.” she whispered.

Sophie smiled.

“That’s Jamie’s boyfriend.”

Her mother looked at her, surprised, but not disgusted or terrified.

“His boyfriend?”

Sophie nodded.

“Jamie’s gay, Mom. . .you never noticed when he was in High School?  You never caught on that I was teasing him all the time about a _girl_ friend because he’d never _have_ one?”

Mrs. Bennett stared at the door for a moment longer before a warm smile spread over her lips.  Tears came to her eyes as she laughed softly.

“My, how grown up our children are.” she whispered. “I. . .I can see why Jamie would feel so stressed and like he could not talk to us about it.”

“He would have told you if you had asked, I think.” Sophie ventured.  “But, since Jack pretty much carried him in here like Prince Valiant, I will rat him out.”

Mrs. Bennett put her arms around her daughter and held her tightly.

“I am blessed to have such wonderful children.” she mused.  “I am happy for you, too, Sophie.  Aster seems like quite the gentleman.  Besides, accents are exotic, aren’t they?”

“Yes they are.” Sophie sighed wistfully.

Her mother smiled.  She felt Sophie’s forehead and “tsked” in her throat.

“You are as warm as Jamie!” she said, worriedly. “Did you try going after him!?”

Sophie shook her head.

“Jack was on top of that.” she said, snickering at her own joke. “I was already getting sick, remember?  Last night?”

Mrs. Bennett nodded.

“Go straight to bed.” she said firmly. “Do you want me to bring you anything?”

Sophie shook her head.

“I’ll be okay, Mom.” she answered.  “Thank you. . .for being okay. . .about Aster.”

Mrs. Bennett grinned.

“You may not believe it, but I was 15 once, too.” she answered.

She looked up the stairs when Mr. Bennett came back down them.

“Is he all right?”

“He’ll be okay.” Mr. Bennett said gently. “He must not have fallen too far from shore because he has no signs of hypothermia.  If anything, it is that damn window he insists on leaving open that’s given him a bit of pneumonia.  He has a bit of a fever, but it is not serious.”

“I’ve tried to lock it, dear.” Mrs. Bennett sighed. “You know how adamant he is about that window.”

“Well, I shut the damn thing.” Mr. Bennett said irritably. “He’ll catch his death of cold.”

“Cold doesn’t bother him, Dad.” Sophie said softly.

She smiled.

“Jamie always gets too hot. . .he loves Winter _because_ it’s cold.”

“There is snow all over the goddamn floor!”

“Dear!”

Sophie laughed and hugged her father.

“I love you, Dad.”

Mr. Bennett hugged his daughter and leaned her back with a sad smile.

“My little girl’s growing up on me.” he sighed. “But, at least she has good taste.”

“I have high standards.”

Mr. Bennett laughed and kissed his daughter’s forehead.  He felt her fever and repeated her mother’s instructions.  Sophie nodded and ascended the stairs. 

She waited until her parents went back to the living room before quietly going across the upstairs hallway and opening her brother’s bedroom door.  The room was still freezing from the window being open for so long.  She shivered sub-consciously and went over to it.

Her fingers dug under the sash and lifted it up several inches.

A gust of cold, winter air blew snowflakes into the room around her.

She smiled when blue eyes stared at her from the other side of the glass.

“Try not to wreck him.” she said softly.

Jack pulled the window open the rest of the way and climbed in through it.  He smiled back and shook his head.

“No promises.”

Sophie smiled again and tilted her head.

“Our. . .parents. . .what did they see?”

“Exactly what you see.” Jack answered tapping the crook of his staff against Jamie’s window so it clouded over with frost.  “The only difference is that the rabbit didn’t look like a rabbit in any way and I looked like a malnourished Goth kid.”

Jack wandered over to Jamie’s desk and noticed the letters sitting in a pile on top of a notebook.  He frowned and pushed them underneath the notebook revealing the drawing Jamie had done a couple of nights ago.

He stared at it appreciatively before Sophie spoke again.

“Then, maybe I should be asking _how_?” Sophie asked.

“The gift from Moon.” Jack answered, smiling. “That is the Mark from _his_ own robes.  That’s why it is such a big deal.  It has a power all of its own.  He said it could help those who still had a bit of hope left in them to see amazing things. . .”

He laughed.

“I guess Bunny and I are pretty amazing.”

Sophie smiled back.

“You are.” she answered.

She looked at her brother asleep on his side under his covers.  She sighed.

“I don’t want him to do this again, Jack.”

She turned back to the Winter Guardian seriously.

“Please don’t let it happen again.”

Jack shook his head.

“It won’t.” he said softly. “There won’t be anywhere he can hide from me after tonight.”

Sophie took the answer at that and nodded.

“Thank you, Jack.”

She paused at Jamie’s door before grinning at the Guardian.

“That was some excellent Improv if I’ve ever heard it, by the way.  Kudos.”

Jack bowed dramatically and grinned back.

“I am clever if nothing else.” he answered.

Sophie quietly stepped into the hall and shut her brother’s door behind her.  She smiled when she heard it lock.  Despite getting a cold, she felt ten times better than she had before.  She felt safe knowing Jamie was under Jack’s care again and he couldn’t do anything stupid.

She made her way back to her room and quietly opened the door.  She closed it behind her and smiled when Bunny was quick to herd her toward her bed.  She did not fight with him.

She was exhausted.

There would be plenty of time to sort out the details of everything later.


	16. Part of Me

Jamie wasn’t sure what time it was when he regained consciousness.  His head felt heavy and his lungs hurt when he breathed.  His eyes opened slowly.

Where was he?

He moaned softly and shifted under the covers.  There was a wonderful chill in the room that made the heat running from his head to his toes ease back. 

He could have sworn his father shut the window.

“Sophie would have been devastated having to give this to us. . .you know that, right, Jamie?”

Jamie turned, startled by the voice.  His eyes opened wider when a rush of recent memories came flooding back to him.  He stared at the Winter Guardian that was sitting at his desk.  His throat felt dry when he saw Jack’s fingers slide through another letter.

“Jack. . .”

Jack turned his head.  The sapphire on his forehead caught the moonlight through the frosted windows.  The Guardian had shut the window after he’d gotten inside.  He agreed with Jamie’s dad that it was stupid to leave it wide open all of the time.

As long as it was open a crack, he’d be able to wrench it open from the outside.

He’d always told Jamie that.

Jack looked at the letter he currently held in his hand.

“If I hadn’t stopped you. . .this letter would have been the final straw.” he murmured, pointing to the one Jamie figured was addressed to Jack personally. “I wouldn’t have wanted to continue on at all after reading it.  Knowing about what had happened. . .only after there was nothing I could do to bring you back and tell you there was no way you could ever be less than amazing in my eyes would have broken me.”

Jamie winced.

“I’m. . .sorry, Jack!” he wheezed painfully. “But. . .I. . .”

He stopped and tried to think of the words to make what he wanted to say sound right.  He finally shook his head and closed his eyes.

“I was ashamed that I did something so stupid.” he finished finally. “I knew I should have turned and left the minute things started to escalate.  I didn’t.  I thought that would have been the deciding factor in your opinion of me.”

Jack listened to this before turning back to the letter in his hand.  He frowned, confused for a moment, before slowly shaking his head.

“What was done to you shouldn’t have happened.” he breathed.  “I should have been there.”

“You wouldn’t have lasted long.” Jamie answered sympathetically. “It was nearly 80 degrees all night!”

“I would have been just fine if I was with _you_.” Jack said sourly.

He looked at his lover, deep, blue eyes sparkling.

“Your heat hits me first, Jamie.  My body is never affected my much. . .sure, intense heat can definitely wear me out if I am in it too long, but _your body heat_ _never_ stresses me or drives me away.

“It drives me _crazy._   I cannot get enough of it.  I’d drown myself in it if I could.”

Jamie smiled sweetly, his brown eyes hazy from fever.

“That’s why the window is always open in the winter.” he breathed. “If I could bring myself to the brink of hypothermia, I felt close to you again.  Driving the cold into my skin and my bones was a way for me to cope without losing you completely.

“I was selfish, Jack. . .I know that now. . .and I don’t know what I will ever do to repay you.”

Jack thought for a very long time before tossing the pages in his hand to the desk.  He waited for a moment before slowly pulling the notebook Jamie had drawn his picture in toward him.  He slowly picked it up and showed Jamie.

“You did this. . .from memory?” Jack asked aloud.

Jamie nodded.

“I could never forget what you look like, Jack.” he whispered. “There wasn’t a day that went by that I didn’t _think_ or _feel_ or _want_ you.  I was desperate to spare you. . .I knew your duty as Guardian came first.  I knew that you might do something to try and get back at the ones that had done this to me. . .and I did not want you to lose your Guardianship.”

“My Guardianship is worth shit without _you_ , Jamie.” Jack said, annoyed. “How many times do I have to tell you that!?”

Jamie laughed softly.

“A few dozen more, I guess.” he rasped.

He took a rough, jagged inhale.  His chest shuddered sharply.  His eyes closed painfully.

“I didn’t feel I was worthy of your affection anymore.”

“And I’ll tell you the exact same thing I told Moon and Pitch!” Jack argued back.  “That is fucking ridiculous!  Because two, fucking morons took advantage of a young, drunk kid I am supposed to just. . . _HATE_ the human that has my heart!?”

Jamie trembled.

“I certainly failed the purity test, didn’t I?”

Jack got up from where he was sitting and moved over to Jamie’s side.  He sat down on the bed beside his lover and angrily turned Jamie’s face so that the mortal was looking at him.  He frowned and pushed their lips together.

Again, the sweet, crisp frost spread across Jamie’s lips and into his mouth.  He moaned softly against Jack’s tongue when it slid across his bottom lip and interacted with his.  Despite being ill with fever, the human’s body reacted with the affection.

When they parted, Jack looked down at Jamie very seriously.

“Tell me, Jamie,” he said softly, “do you think that _I_ am pure?”

“Yes.”

Jamie didn’t even hesitate.  That seemed like a no brainer.  Given how old Jack was when he became a Guardian and the fact he hadn’t been attached to anyone other than Jamie, the human believed without a doubt that Jack Frost was as pure as the snow he created.

Jack laughed softly, shaking his head.

“Everyone always thinks that just because I am the runt that I don’t understand.” he murmured. “It would be funny if it didn’t hurt so much first.”

“Jack. . .it. . .it isn’t an insult.” Jamie whispered.

Jack thought for a moment before turning to look into Jamie’s glossy, brown eyes.  He gently brushed the human’s hair out of his eyes and smirked.

“They taught me. . .in my life. . .that what I enjoyed was a sin.  What love I wanted in my life was considered an abomination and despicable. . .no matter how much I loved the person I was with at the time.

“The act itself condemned me.”

It took Jamie a moment before he slowly pushed himself up and braced himself on his elbows.  He stared at Jack intently.

“What are you trying to say, Jack?” he asked quietly.

“It isn’t obvious?” Jack asked back.  “I’ve known what kind of lover I’ve wanted my whole life!  I didn’t care if I was thrown out of the Church or locked away or hanged for it.  I loved the ones I was with when I was with them.

“Before I died, I’d had two or three different boyfriends.  The last had taught me a lot about being a giving lover.  I fell in love with _being_ that kind of lover.  I think I would have run away with him so we could live our lives in peace, but that was the year I drowned.”

Jamie could feel his heart racing in his chest.  His breaths were coming out in short, sharp pants.  His skin was starting to perspire.

“Boyfriends?”

Jack smiled and nodded.

“I was raised by my mother after our father died.  She was a firm believer in the idea that love could not be based on things such as beauty, sex, religion or wealth.  She told me that love could only exist when _the heart_ was in love.”

He looked at Jamie and brushed his bangs off of his forehead again.

“After I became Jack Frost, none of that seemed to matter. . .until I met _you_.”

Jack slid his fingers over the sides of Jamie’s face.  He enjoyed the mortal’s moan when frost appeared and then instantly melted over flushed, heated skin.  His smile got wider.

“Looking into your eyes ten years ago when you saw me was like seeing into the eyes of my soul mate, Jamie.” he whispered. “I knew I could not leave you. . .even if you stopped believing, even if you grew up and had a family of your own. . .I would never, EVER, love someone as much as I loved _you_.”

Jack wrapped his arms around Jamie when the human pushed himself up and threw himself into the Guardian’s chest.  He smiled against the strands of Jamie’s hair when the mortal dug his nails into the Winter Guardian’s back.  He spoke comforting words when Jamie started to sob quietly.

“It’s all right, Jamie. . .” he whispered. “. . .in fact. . .it is so much all right that the minute you looked into my eyes I knew that I would have everything I needed to do whatever the Guardians wanted.”

Jack leaned Jamie back and looked at him.

“That everything was _you_ , Jamie.” he finished, smiling. “It does not justify or CONDONE what those bastards did to you. . .but it should at least give you comfort and understanding that they did nothing but prove they were savage beasts that would rather _hurt_ a person for their body than _love them for it_.”

Jamie trembled violently and held onto Jack’s shoulders to keep himself upright.  He laughed half-hearted and shook his head.

“So. . .I would have really been the virgin then.”

“I am afraid so, Jamie.” Jack grinned. “I’ve had my fair share to know what I want.  When your life expectancy isn’t much greater than 20-25 years old if you are lucky you have to act fast.”

Jamie smiled.  He looked into Jack’s eyes and nodded.

“I am so sorry I was. . .was dramatic about it.”

“With every right.” Jack answered.  “And I would have probably gone over the deep end at that point until I saw you crying in the dorm room shower at the end of your nightmare. . .the water was so cold and all you could do was apologise to _me_.

“It put out the anger like a bucket of water on a fire.”

“Jack. . .”

The Winter Guardian put his finger against Jamie’s lips and shook his head.

“Seeing you apologise for what they had done to you. . .that made me feel like _I_ had failed.  I wasn’t there when you clearly needed me.  I will never forgive myself for that.  But if you give me a chance, Jamie. . .I can show you that love isn’t that way. . .it’s not. . .

“. . .and I will not hurt you like that. . .”

Jamie leaned into Jack’s touch and trembled when Jack’s other hand slid down his side.  His stomach twisted into a tight knot when he subconsciously moved closer to his lover.  He enjoyed the cool, frosted tips traveling down his ribs and hip.

He started to nod.

“Yes.” he breathed. “Yes. . .please. . .”

“Please?”

“Show me.”

Jack smirked.

“Don’t underestimate me.” he murmured against Jamie’s ear.  “With a fever, you might actually pass out.”

“I don’t care.” Jamie rasped, enjoying Jack’s flesh exploring his. “I will take what you give to me. . .I will have all of _you_ , too, Jack Frost.”

He had to make a conscious effort to keep his arms around Jack’s neck when the Guardian pressed their lips together and slid his hand between his thighs.  The added heat from his fever kept Jack’s chill at bay when slender fingers gently began kneading flesh.

Jamie dug his fingers into Jack’s back and let his head fall forward to his shoulder.  He closed his eyes and shuddered gently.  It was hard to doubt his lover when Jack had coaxed him erect as fast as he had.

“Jack. . .”

Jack smiled and eased Jamie’s head back so he could see the mortal’s face.  He ran his lips across Jamie’s jaw and enjoyed the soft gasp it elicited.

“I have to agree with your aggressors on one point.” Jack breathed gently.  “You do look wonderfully beautiful with a blush in your face, Jamie.”

Jamie opened his eyes as wide as they would allow.  The half-lidded irises sparkled with fever.  He smiled faintly.

“It isn’t. . .and wasn’t. . .the first time I’ve. . .heard that.”

“By the time I’m done with you, Jamie, you aren’t going to remember it.” Jack promised softly. “The only thing you’ll ever remember, need or want will be _me_.”

Jamie whispered incoherently when Jack pressed his lips against his neck.  A welcome chill eased the aching in his throat.  He felt the Guardian lean him back before pulling away.  He felt his hand reach out.

“Patience.” Jack scolded playfully.  “I have on more clothes than you.”

Jamie forced his eyes to open when Jack grabbed the hem of his hoodie and pulled it over his head.  The moonlight outside reflected off of the charm around the Guardian’s neck, the two sapphires glittering together.  Jamie trembled and reached out a second time to touch Jack’s slender torso.

Jack smiled when he tossed his hoodie to Jamie’s bedroom floor.  He grabbed Jamie’s hand and held it to his chest over his heart.  He relished the intense heat that flooded over and through him.

He hadn’t been lying when he had said Jamie’s heat drove him crazy.  As Jamie had gotten older, the intensity had only grown stronger.  It wasn’t painful. No. It was far from painful.  The heat was welcome and thawed him in a way that made him feel like he used to when he was alive.

When Jamie was close to him, he felt like he was a part of _Jamie_.

“If I didn’t know. . .better, Jack. . .I’d say you like my body heat. . .more than I like. . .your body’s cold.”

Jamie smiled up at the Guardian when Jack acknowledged him.  His eyes were kind despite his playful tone.  He enjoyed the gentle kiss against his fingers.

“I told you I did.” Jack admitted softly. “I’d drown myself in _you_ , Jamie.  I’d do it in a heartbeat.”

Jamie was silent for a few moments before reaching out with his other hand and wrapping his arm around Jack’s waist.  He tugged gently until the Guardian was against his chest and flush against his body. He silently wrapped his arms around Jack and held him.

“Then let’s promise.” Jamie breathed. “The only drowning either of us do. . .is in each other.”

Jack smiled against Jamie’s shoulder and nodded slowly.

“It’s a promise.” he agreed.

He leaned back and put his lips against Jamie’s.  He gently eased his body weight off of his lover and kept himself balanced on his forearms.  By the time he parted from the human, Jamie’s breath was as cold as his.

Jack raked his fingers through Jamie’s hair and enjoyed the wonderful sounds it elicited.  He had to make a concentrated effort to keep his lover’s body still beneath his when Jamie arched into his touch appreciatively.

It had been a long time since he’d had a physical lover.  He would admit he was out of practise, but the longer Jamie writhed, the more the instinct was coming back.  The Guardian dug his fingers into the mortal’s hair and pulled him up for another kiss.

Jamie was panting by the time Jack moved back in order to remove the remainder of his clothes.  His lungs were delightfully cold and they did not hurt as badly as they had before.  His eyes were closed and his lips were parted slightly.  His breath was icy and creating visible puffs of air each time he exhaled.

“Jack. . .you are a horrible tease. . .”

Jack laughed and tossed his leggings to the floor with the rest of his clothes.

“I’m a tease?  I’d have taken you years ago, Jamie. . .if I’d have known  you felt the same.”

Jack’s fingertips coaxed Jamie to open his eyes.  Jamie looked at the Winter Guardian with a small smile.  His hands slid down Jack’s sides and came to rest on his hips when Jack sat across his lap.  He was the right amount of cold.  It made the added heat dissipate.

Jamie moaned something incoherently and arched up into Jack.

“I’m sorry I waited then.” he whispered.

“I already said you were forgiven.” Jack admonished leaning down to steal another kiss from parted, heated lips.

A deep blush was running through his face and down his torso.  It was rare to see the Winter Guardian blush; but when he was around Jamie or he was over-heated, the pale skin always became a shade of bright pink. It drove the Guardian mad.

“Turn over, Jamie.” Jack whispered.

Jamie obliged his lover and wiggled his body out from under Jack’s.  He slowly turned, bed covers slipping down a long, well defined back.  He hadn’t gotten all the way over onto his stomach before the Guardian was wrapping his arms around his chest and pressing his body against his.

A guttural moan left their throats at the same time when Jamie’s body heat transferred to Jack’s and Jamie enjoyed the rush of cold from his neck to his feet. Jack’s lips were pressed against the back of his neck and the front of the Guardian’s body was firmly planted against his backbone.

Jamie gasped for breath and dug his fingers into the sheets.  He shuddered and bowed his head.  Jack’s body felt even better when there was nothing covering it.  His heartbeat quickened in his chest when Jack’s fingers wrapped around hard, heated flesh and began stroking.  He trembled violently on his arms.

“Jack. . .don’t stop. . .”

Jack smiled sweetly against the nape of Jamie’s neck.  His hand moved firmly over the burning flesh in his palm.  He could feel Jamie’s stomach clench and his muscles tighten beneath him.  He pressed his body tighter against his lover’s.

“I won’t, Jamie. . .not unless you want me to. . .”

Jamie shook his head, fever blush spreading down his torso and abdomen.

“No.” he moaned helplessly. “No. . .”

Jack’s body pulled back when his other hand slid between Jamie’s backside and pressed against the tight, ring of muscle that was pulsing with heat.  The Guardian’s breath quickened in his lungs when the heat caused the ice and frost to melt from his fingers.  He trembled when he pressed the cold, wet digits against Jamie’s entrance.

Jamie cried out softly when the coldness filled him.  He moaned wantonly and pushed back against Jack’s hand.  He had to put his hand over his lips to keep his voice from getting any louder.  He felt another one of Jack’s fingers join the first, working him open.  He shook his head.

“More. . .I want more, Jack. . .”

He felt like he was standing outside of his body observing from the other side of the room.  The cold fought back the fever while the pleasure made his entire pelvic floor shudder.  He barely felt the third finger enter him when Jack pressed his lips against his neck.

“I don’t know whether to be glad you are as impatient as ever or scold you for it.” Jack said softly against Jamie’s skin.

He smiled and gently pulled his hand back.  He could feel Jamie’s body shudder beneath his.  He used his other hand to illicit another, sweet moan from his lover’s throat.  The flesh in his hand was throbbing.

If he waited much longer, Jamie would get ahead of him.

“I suppose I should be glad you are _you_.”

Jamie’s eyes were narrow when Jack pulled away from him.  He gasped for breath and dug his fingers into his bed sheets.  He twisted them violently in his hands when the cold pressed firmly against his entrance.  His eyes rolled back and he trembled.

“Jack. . .”

“You’re beautiful when you beg, too, Jamie.”

It would have been a terrific lie if Jack had said he hadn’t thought about doing this to Jamie a long time ago.  He’d had plenty of thoughts about what he’d like to do to him once the mortal reached the right age.  No matter how much he wanted it, though, he would never take it.  Jamie was so quiet and reserved it was hard to tell how he really felt.

Jack moaned softly and slowly pushed inside of his lover beneath him.  His fingertips were dug firmly into Jamie’s thin hips, guiding the human back carefully.  He’d known Jamie’s heat was delicious, but the heat inside of him was even better. 

The sapphire in his forehead lit up faintly. Bright, white halos appeared around the dark irises while Jamie’s flesh took on the same, translucent colour as his own. 

“Fuck. . . _fuck!_ ”

Jamie smiled faintly when Jack pulled him back sharper than he’d intended.  His face was still flushed a brilliant pink when he glanced over his shoulder.  Through the haze he could see just how much Jack _had_ wanted him.

The Guardian’s face was relaxed and focused on the human beneath him.  His eyes were closed and his breaths were coming in short pants. He was trying to be gentle, but it was becoming harder.  The sudden tightness in his jaw and the gritted teeth alerted Jamie to his lover’s distress.

“I’m not going to break. . .Jack.”

Jack opened his eyes and looked down at Jamie.  The brown eyes stared at him, amused.  He trembled, only halfway inside of his lover.  The heat was intense and the fire burned hotter than any he could remember from when he was alive.  More of his skin was turning a faint pink when Jamie smiled sweetly and pushed back against him.

The Guardian’s eyes rolled back when the rest of the flames consumed him.  He became disoriented while the heat surrounded him and tightened.  He could hear Jamie’s voice bringing him back to the present while his fingers dug into his lover’s hips sharper.

“Jamie. . .you. . .are. . .ill. . .I do not. . .want to hurt. . .you. . .even more. . .”

The words were disjointed and did not sound right.  It didn’t sound like his voice when he spoke them.  The Guardian didn’t have much time to think about it before that fire started to move around him.  It was all he could do to keep from fiercely thrusting as he kept his hands firmly against slender hips to control a ragged pace.

“At this rate, Jack. . .I’m going to wreck _you_.”

Jack opened his eyes again and looked down at Jamie.  He stared into the flushed face and the narrow, brown eyes.  Brown bangs were sticking to the human’s face and forehead.  Frost was spreading over Jamie’s back from the Guardian’s fingertips and immediately turning to water against the burning flesh.

He grinned.

“You don’t understand how fucking good you feel, Jamie.” he answered honestly. “It isn’t. . .like I haven’t thought about this earlier. . .I just didn’t know how you felt until a few years ago. . .when you asked if you could kiss me on the Solstice that year.”

Jamie smiled and nodded.

“It was my Christmas wish.”

Jack was surprised.

“It was?”

Jamie nodded again.

“It must have been. . .the same time you went to North about. . .taking _me_ for yourself.” he added. “Because Sophie insists that is how it happened.”

Jack thought about the discussion that he’d had with North and Bunny regarding the subject.  As the memory came back to him, North had looked particularly pleased about Jack’s request.  There was that twinkle in his eyes that he got when he was watching something come together that made him happy.

The Guardian reached forward and put his hand against Jamie’s face.  He breathed deeply and memorised the lines and curves of his lover.  He memorised the colours of his eyes, his blush and the small, spread of freckles he’d carried with him from childhood.  He smiled again and nodded.

“I should have tried to tell you. . .how I felt, Jack.” Jamie breathed against Jack’s hand. “None of us would have had to suffer if I would have said something.”

Jack shook his head.

“That was my responsibility.” he said firmly.  “I was able to see Sophie.  I was able to sense something was wrong.  That should have been enough to get me to act.  Instead, I shut down.  I cannot forgive myself for that.  But what I can do is make sure it never happens again.”

“The world is a terrible place when you grow up, Jack.” Jamie said painfully. “There is a lot of bad in it.”

“But there is a lot of _good_ in it, too.” Jack countered, pushing forward and eliciting a moan from his lover. “I am not saying I can shield you from all of that, because I can’t. . .but I wouldn’t want to, Jamie. . .you’d get tired of me and I would fear losing you.

“Moon said something. . .when we visited Pitch. . .that made a lot of sense to me.”

Jack paused before looking at Jamie earnestly.

“He said that there cannot be good dreams without bad dreams.  No child and no Guardian _want_ bad dreams, but without what they teach, a child would not grow and learn.  Our greatest desire is to protect children. . .but a part of doing that job means knowing when it is time to let them learn about their world and everything in it.”

“That’s how. . .some of us stop believing.”

Jack smiled at Jamie and nodded.

“Yeah.” he answered. “This world, in particular, has rules that force children to leave their wonder and imagination behind when they start to grow too old.  But there are these magnificent occasions when a child grows to adulthood and still maintains the wonder of a child.  They never lose their imaginations, their wild dreams or their intense belief in the magic they remembered as a kid.”

Jamie smiled when Jack slid his body against the back of his and wrapped one of his arms around his chest.  Despite the Guardian losing the chill in his own body, Jamie could feel the rush of ice and cold flood over his skin and into his. His body shuddered beneath Jack’s when his lover slowly pressed his hips in until they were against his backside.

Jack moaned and dug his fingertips into Jamie’s chest.  He could feel his lover’s breath against his cheek when Jamie nuzzled it.  It took a few seconds to acclimate to the flames surrounding him.  The charm around his neck fell between Jamie’s shoulder blades and rested there when the human softly caressed his skin with his lips.

The Guardian looked at Jamie slowly and waited when Jamie smiled at him.

“I can’t give up what I know is true, Jack.” Jamie breathed. “It isn’t a matter of just _believing_ you exist.  I _know_ you exist.  On top of knowing you exist, I am in _love_ with what I _know and believe is true_.  No one can take that belief out of me. . .even if they can take everything else _from_ me.”

Jack pressed his lips against Jamie’s and dropped the arm that was wrapped around the human down beside Jamie’s on the bed.  He leaned his weight heavily against the limb while his other hand felt for the concentrated heat in Jamie’s groin.

Jamie’s moan was lost in between their lips while Jack stroked with his one hand and thrust into him sending the cold deeper inside.  By the time they had parted, Jamie had bowed his head forward and focused on the wonderful chill.  His toes curled when Jack’s legs became entangled in his.  He mumbled incoherently while Jack’s hand continued to pump his organ.

Jack buried his face in Jamie’s shoulder and moaned desperately.  He could feel pre cum beading up at the tip of Jamie’s cock. His cool fingers slid over the slick wetness and used it to trail his fingertips over the head and around the glans.

Jamie’s body was so warm his frost was melting faster than he could produce it.  This drove the Guardian mad.  The inside of his lover’s body was amazing.  He was tight and he was hot.  He couldn’t remember sex ever feeling this great when he was alive.  Nothing he’d had before compared to the combination of cold and hot that was in the bed they were sharing right now.

“Jack. . .faster. . .fuck. . .me faster. . .”

“Fuck, Jamie. . .fuck. . .you’re going. . .to be the death of me. . .”

Jamie smiled, head bent down and eyes closed.  He was focused on Jack’s breath against his neck and the Guardian’s body pressed perfectly against his spine.  He could feel Jack’s heartbeat and ragged breathing. The slender hands working him to climax were moving with experience and skill.  The intense pleasure was radiating from his thighs to his ass.

“As long as it’s me. . .you haven’t broken our promise.”

Jack opened his eyes narrowly and laughed softly.  His hair was becoming damp from the frost melting against Jamie’s flesh.  He trembled while his hips pushed into Jamie from behind.  He could feel his stomach twisting and his breath hitching in his lungs.

“I love you, Jamie. . .”

“I love you, too, Jack.”

Jack’s fingers dug into Jamie’s when he began to thrust into his lover at a free for all pace.  He could feel the deep, tight spot he’d been searching for when Jamie cried out softly and brought his other hand to cover his lips. The Guardian had to focus to keep his pressure even on Jamie’s flesh.

The heat was growing.  It was spreading and it was filling him.  He’d never been this close to him before.  He could feel every muscle and every movement.  He could hear Jamie’s heart and feel his ragged breathing.

Jamie’s eyes opened slowly when he felt the Mark around his neck start to get cold as it bounced against his collarbones.  The crescent moon shimmered while the golden light spread out and over him.  His brown eyes slowly faded to a translucent blue. His skin became a gentle white and paled underneath Jack’s.

The mortal smiled when snowflakes gathered in his hair, turning it white like Jack’s had been before the Solstice.  He began to pull one of his hands back to touch the one Jack had wrapped around the organ between his legs.

Jack felt a relieving coolness flow through him through the fire in which he had been consumed.  Water was sliding down the sides of his face and chest when he stared at Jamie, confused.  He gasped softly when he noticed the changes in his lover’s appearance.

“Jamie!”

“Once in a Blue Moon on my planet means that it happens so very rarely, not many people see it at all.” Jamie rasped, ice crystals forming on the air in front of him.  “Not just anyone can see that beauty, Jack.

“I’ll protect you as you protect me. . .and together, we will never have to worry about being lost to one another again.”

Jack felt tears roll down his cheeks and fall to Jamie’s back where they froze.  He held onto Jamie’s fingers tighter and urged Jamie to increase the pace against the mortal’s cock.  He needed to feel more of this heat.  He needed to know what it felt like again to be absorbed in the fire and heat of the one person he’d never forget.

Jamie cried out softly, his body being thrust back into Jack’s hips and forward into his hand.  He could feel the tightening of his muscles as the intense white gathered behind his eyes and started to shoot up his spine.  He began to shake beneath his partner when Jack hit a particularly wonderful spot inside of him.

“Jack. . .Jack. . .I’m. . .going to. . .cum. . .”

“Please, Jamie. . .please. . .”

Jack’s eyes were so dark they were almost black instead of blue when Jamie released into his hand.  The hot, wet stream slid between his fingers and burned already blistering flesh.  Jack did not pull away or stop as he listened to Jamie’s soft cries beneath him.

The Guardian felt the temperature sky rocket when he felt Jamie tighten around him.  His eyes rolled back and he pulled away from his lover to grab his hips and thrust deeper inside of Jamie.  His flesh was looking less like his own and more as Jamie’s should look.  The sapphire against his forehead lit up a brilliant blue and let out a bright flash of light.

Jamie cried out and arched his back when Jack started to shake.  He shook his head and lifted it so the moonlight from the frosted windows struck his forehead.  It felt like he was being bitten by the frost as a bright, yellow crescent moon appeared in the exact same place where Jack carried the Blue Moon.

When Jamie opened his eyes, they were the same blue as Jack’s had been before he’d evolved.

He could hear Jack say something, but he couldn’t understand what was said.  All he could feel was the heat that speared through the cold that had set into his body.  It was intense and painful, but not so much so that it was unbearable.  He felt himself rocking back against his lover’s thrusts in anticipation.  He felt Jack’s muscles tense.

“Part of me. . .Jamie. . .” Jack mumbled incoherently. “. . .you’re. . .a part of me, now.”

Jack slammed his hips into Jamie’s backside two or three more times before his stomach loosened and he felt the familiar unclenching of his muscles.  He was sweating profusely and his hair was turning a dark shade of indigo black.  His skin was the colour of any human’s flesh as he cried out softly.

“Cumming. . . Jamie. . .I’m cumming. . .”

Jamie felt the rush of heat swell inside of him causing the cold to dim.  He gasped for breath when the rush and the pleasure filled him.  He could feel Jack trying to work down his pace behind him.  The Guardian was shaking so hard both of them were trembling.

He smiled, his lips a faint blue.

He understood now.

The place he had beside Jack Frost. . .what Darkness he had to protect. . .was the first job the Guardian had been given.  Guard the Winter Night.  Guard Winter, period.  He was the first Guardian of a Guardian.

Jack gave a final growl before collapsing against Jamie’s back, exhausted.  He could feel the intense heat against cold.  He could feel himself still twitching inside of his lover as the hot, slick mess slid down the inside of Jamie’s thigh. 

The Guardian panted for breath and weakly reached his arms around Jamie’s body.  He held onto his lover carefully and breathed against Jamie’s neck.  He welcomed the cold that radiated back to the heat his body had absorbed.  He was still so disoriented that he hadn’t realised that Jamie had become a splitting image of his former self.

They were silent for several minutes while they caught their breaths.  The moonlight shifted through the frost on the windows and caused the ice crystals in the designs to sparkle.  Finally, Jamie turned his head to look over his shoulder.

“You alive, Jack?”

Jack smiled against Jamie’s neck and nodded.

“I’m more alive than I ever was, Jamie.” he breathed.

Jamie smiled back and noted Jack’s changed appearance.  His eyes were kind.

“There was another reason Moon sent me his Mark, Jack.”

Jack caught his breath and slowly lifted his head.  His eyes widened when he saw icy blue eyes staring back at him kindly.  He noted the pale skin and the blue lips.  He could see that Jamie’s hair had been faded to a pure white.  The crescent on his forehead glittered while the Mark around his lover’s neck pulsed with the same light as Jack’s sapphire.

He shook his head.

“Jamie!”


	17. The Beginning of the Story

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo, you may not realise this from the lack of it on my fandom page. . .but I am a big, BIG Moonie. . . .HUGE. 20th Anniversary and all. . .had to see what I could do to incorporate all this together. I actually lose myself a bit in these next, few chapters. They bear re-reading because they are important for later. But I will say this: even when it seems confusing and horrifically boring, you may find you learn something you didn't realise was actually truth.
> 
> Time to question science AND belief, darlings.
> 
> Yours,  
> Six

Jack carefully pulled back and enjoyed the wonderful hiss that came out of Jamie’s throat when he pulled out of him.  It took Jack a second to get the room to stop moving.  When he had, he looked at his hands, surprised.

The warm, tanned flesh was dark and disorienting to his eyes.

“Here.”

Jack watched Jamie reach out and touch a glass of water he had on his nightstand.  His jaw dropped when the water froze solid under his lover’s touch.  He trembled when Jamie handed it to him.  In his reflection, Jack Frost could see that his hair had become darker and his skin had melted from underneath the icy shell.

While he continued to stare, the glass began to warm between his hands.

Jack looked at the water and condensation forming against the object and running down his fingers.  His eyes narrowed when he looked up at Jamie again.  He could see that Jamie had been given warning about this.  His lover was far too calm, looking as he had just hours ago, smiling at Jack like there was nothing wrong in the world.

“I don’t understand.” Jack breathed.

“Power of the Blue Moon, Jack.” Jamie answered gently. “Moon had come before you saved me. He told me that you carried too much light, and I carried too much darkness. . .for us to exist together.  But he knew if he allowed you to continue as you were, darkness would consume you as well. . .but your light would become too bright for me.

“He said my place beside you would be far greater than any that existed for a Guardian right now.  I didn’t understand, and he didn’t answer at the time; but I know now what Moon was talking about when he said it.”

Jamie smiled and gently took the glass out of Jack’s hands and set it aside.  He stared at his lover peacefully. He could see the fear rooted behind Jack’s eyes.  There was a part of the Guardian that did not believe this story.

The human sighed and turned to look around his room.  He saw Jack’s staff leaning against his desk.  He smiled again and held out his hand.

Jack was startled when the object obediently flew forward and allowed Jamie to take hold of it.

The Guardian stared, dumbfounded.

“You made me yours.” Jamie said thoughtfully. “That was the only piece we were missing. Once we had become connected as we’d always wanted, the Blue Moon Transformation was complete. It comes in two parts.

“First, it is the rare _second_ Full Moon seen during the Harvest Month.  That is what confused me when I went to the pond with Sophie.  The Moon was full and far too bright for this time of year.  Then, as I saw Moon. . .I realised that there _hadn’t been_ a Blue Moon this past Harvest Month. He’d been saving it. . .for you. . .and me. . .knowing that eventually something would give.”

Jamie laughed softly.

“Second, the Blue Moon only looks blue because of the components of the atmosphere. . .if what I saw right before Moon disappeared is true, then you were the one that _made it blue_ , Jack.  Your power was already at max because of the Solstice, but the Blue Moon is said to have great power of its own when unlocked.”

Jack swallowed hard and watched Jamie hold his staff.  He pulled his eyes away and looked at him.

“What. . .did you see?”

“A brilliant ball of blue crashing down behind Moon.” Jamie answered automatically. “It was moving faster than I’d seen anything move.  I recognised it immediately, Jack.  I knew it was _you_!”

Jack reached out and touched Jamie’s face with one hand and put another against his lips.  Tears appeared in his eyes and slid down his cheeks when he felt the cold emanating off of his lover. He shook terribly and moved his fingertips to the moon crescent in Jamie’s forehead.

“This. . .is the Mark of the Moon.” Jack said hoarsely.

Jamie nodded.

“If you were the blue, someone else had to represent the Moon in your place.”

Jack could feel his heart hammering in his chest.  He shook his head again and let his hand fall away from Jamie’s face.  He winced.

“My place?”

Jamie smiled.

“I am the first of my kind.” he said softly. “Moon had told me that I had a special place beside you, Jack.  I was a piece of you. . .a _part_ of you.  By assuming your body on the Solstice Blue Moon, I become the priest to the Moon in your place. . .because I am the Guardian of another Guardian.  To you, Jack Frost, I am the Guardian of the Guardian of Winter’s Heart and Soul.

“It is my job to protect you from those feelings that we trapped inside that pendant you wear.”

Jack’s hand pressed against the snowflake against his collarbones.  The cold of the metal bit into the heated flesh pleasurably.  He shook his head again and put his hand against his lips to keep from crying aloud.  He bowed his head when Jamie stretched the staff out and touched the crook to the windows changing the patterns of frost across them.

“I am the excess light that can control the darkness and allow you to continue doing what you need to do, Jack.  In this form, you and I share the same body, heart and soul.  Like you said, we are so connected there is no distinction between us anymore.”

Jack’s fingers slid from his lips when he started to laugh.  It was soft at first, but it quickly grew into a loud, rumbling roar.  He lunged forward and pulled Jamie into his arms. He started sobbing when Jamie put his free arm around him comfortingly.

“It’s all right, Jack. “Jamie breathed. “This isn’t permanent.  Only when the blue joins the Moon can we form together.  It will take some practise to get used to it; but once we have the transformation down, you can call on this power any time you wish.”

Jamie leaned Jack back and pointed to the sapphire glowing in his forehead.  He moved his finger to the crescent Moon on his.

“Like this.”

Jack felt the air being sucked out of his lungs when Jamie pressed their foreheads together.  There was a violent shift between them as Jamie’s body absorbed the darkness from him and the light left Jamie’s body in return.  The symbols were bright while the exchange took place.  Once Jack Frost had regained his pale skin and lighter hair and Jamie had his dark eyes and hair back, the symbols became dark once more.

Jamie trembled against Jack and felt his lover bring his arms up around him when he came close to fainting.  He gasped for breath and felt the pain in his throat and lungs radiate back to him.  He looked at his lover when the Guardian lifted his face so that indigo eyes were staring at him.

“So, let me get. . .this straight. . .” Jack said hoarsely. “. . .you and I. . .share this power?”

Jamie nodded.

“Moon asked me to protect you. . .your heart. . .your wonderful, beautiful spark.  In return, he gave me what I needed to be protected.  We are one.  I am a _piece_ of you.  I _belong_ to you.”

Jack laughed nervously and shook his head.

“A Guardian for a Guardian, huh?” he asked.  “I have never heard of anything like that.”

“Because I am the first.” Jamie answered sweetly. “There may come a time when it is more common, but right now, there are not humans strong enough that could be entrusted with the task. The human spirit is far weaker now than it used to be.”

“Except in the Bennett Household, apparently.” Jack teased playfully.

He reached forward and pulled Jamie onto his lap, staff and all. He looked into Jamie’s fever glazed eyes and brushed his dark brown hair out of his face.  He shook his head and trembled.

“I deserve you, Jamie.” he breathed painfully. “You should be mine.”

“And now I am.” Jamie answered.  “Our feelings have been admitted in full.  There is nothing left to hide or be afraid of anymore.  It was the only thing that was holding us back, but it was the one thing that needed to happen to reveal the potential in _you_ , Jack Frost.”

“My potential?  I thought I’d done that already?” Jack asked, humourously.

Jamie smiled again and threaded his fingers through Jack’s hair.  He enjoyed the soft whimpers of appreciation from the Guardian’s throat.

“Your true potential to be dedicated to the mission you were given, Jack.” he answered softly. “By facing what would have otherwise turned you against the light that guided you, you turned that experience into something that fueled your desire to want to _protect_ what you loved.

“It allowed _me_ to admit what I had been hiding from my lover because of shame when my lover hadn’t judged me in the first place.”

Jack gently put his hands against Jamie’s face.  He looked up at his Guardian sweetly and shook his head.

“I would never judge you, Jamie.” he breathed. “Again, I wouldn’t judge _you_ based on what someone _else_ had done to you.”

Jamie smiled and tangled his fingers in the hair at the nape of Jack’s neck.  He nodded slowly and pressed his body into Jack’s.  The exchange of cold and hot began again as the lovers sat together in silence for a few moments.

“Moon’s gift gives us something else.” Jamie whispered.

“Yeah?” Jack asked, kissing Jamie’s throat. “What’s that?”

“I get all the benefits of a Guardian even though I remain human.”

Jack pulled away, not understanding what this meant at first.  Finally, after Jamie’s incessant smile hadn’t left his face, the Guardian of Winter understood.  He grinned, tears appearing in his eyes.

“We never have to be apart!?” Jack asked aloud. “We will always be together!?”

Jamie nodded.

“Moon repaired your symbol at the Pole to include mine.  You can call on me and I can feel you from anywhere on Earth.  I can find you and go to you from anywhere.  It is my duty as your Guardian to protect you, Jack.  As priest to the Moon, that is my mission.  I am _your Guardian_.

“You control me as you wish.”

Jack pulled Jamie down and pressed their lips together, the heat and the cold mixing on their tongues.  He was shaking from the relief and excitement of such a proposition.  It seemed too good to be true.

“That’s a dangerous string of words.” Jack rasped against Jamie’s lips.

Jamie smiled.

“You are in Moon’s debt no longer.  In his shadow you will not sit.  Though you may be the chosen Guardian of Winter, you also guard the Light and Fun in believers’ hearts.  To put too many restrictions on you would only daunt your powers.  It would not help you.

“By being Moon’s priest for him, I give him access to the Earth like he hasn’t had before.”

Jamie pointed to his symbol.

“Moon can get here much easier now through me.”

“And others. . .you could get others to him faster. . .safer. . .” Jack murmured.

Jamie nodded.

“Now you are catching on.” he mused.

He laughed when Jack blew cold air against his neck.  He shoved his lover in the shoulder and grinned when Jack smiled up at him. 

“Just so I understand,” Jack said silkily, “you are _my_ Guardian only?”

Jamie nodded.

“Yes."

“And your title is?”

“Guardian of the Guardian of Winter’s Heart and Soul.” Jamie answered softly. “It is my duty to protect the light and spark in the Winter Guardian’s heart so that he may continue his work and protect the cherished rights of believers to have fun, embrace their light and grow from it.”

Jack smiled and touched the crescent moon on Jamie’s forehead.  The Mark was warm beneath his fingertips.  His eyes moved over his lover’s body in wonder.  It felt too good to be true.

“This isn’t a dream, Jamie, is it?  I am not going to wake up later and find out none of this has happened?”

Jamie smiled.

“I figured that would be something I would ask _you_.” he chided.  “But, this isn’t a dream.  We, you and I, are real.  The situation and the circumstances are real.  Our relationship is just that unique that there is no other way for Moon to protect his Guardians without making sure _you_ are protected and safe.

“He cannot afford to lose another Guardian to the darkness. . .or to failure.”

Jack hesitated before looking at Jamie curiously.

“Jamie. . .do you know what happened to the four Winter Guardians before me?”

Jamie nodded.

“I do.”

Jack looked down and searched the floor.  He aimlessly took the staff and pointed the indigo iced crook at the glass, changing the frost patterns a third time.  He finally turned back to Jamie and winced.

“I want to know, too.”

“They are not pleasant endings to watch, Jack.” Jamie said softly. “Moon has suffered greatly at the hands of his mission.”

Jamie touched the staff and the wood lit up in a bright white.  He watched the images from Moon’s own memory start to form out of ice and snow on the floor in front of them.  He tilted his head, his eyes becoming lighter and lighter.

“There are Guardians and spirits that protect all sacred and magical things on each planet and star in the cosmos.” Jamie whispered, watching the Milky Way span across his floor and into the ceiling. “For every Planet, there are stronger Guardians and lesser spirits to do the work assigned by what is called a _Master Guardian._ ”

Jack watched, keeping his arms firmly around Jamie’s waist as the staff focused in on Earth and its Guardians.  He noticed the Guardian circle underneath the Moon.  He tilted his head when the image moved out and Moon stood beside Pitch and another, taller Guardian with blazing red hair and fierce, fiery eyes.

“Who. . .is she?”

The third Guardian stood as tall as Moon and had long hair covered by a helmet with orange ribbons blowing around it.  She wore battle armour that covered her shoulders, torso and chest. Her legs were long and tanned and her boots were armoured and couloured the same gold and red as her other armour.  A sword was at her side and a shield was attached to her back.

“That is Sun. . .Sunny is what Moon calls her.” Jamie answered. “She is the Guardian of the Day, of the Sun.  She watches over the Guardians that protect the seasons of warmth and growth when her presence is felt longer on Earth.”

Jack was startled.  He looked at Jamie quickly.

“But. . .wouldn’t that include Aster?” he asked softly. “He is the Guardian of Spring. . .”

Jamie paused before looking down.

“It did.” he said softly. “But that was a long time ago. . .when Pitch forgot his place the first time. Sunny did not come to defend her Guardian when he needed her.  Because of her inaction, he lost his entire family.  He lost everything dear to him.  In turn, Sunny lost every Guardian and Spirit not immediately connected with the Summer months.”

Jack was startled.

“Then, why does Moon blame himself for Bunny’s war!?”

“Because it was _his_ job to keep his hot-headed sister and his jealous brother in check.” Jamie answered coldly. “Moon is the oldest. He has been in existence for longer.  He came to this planet from farther away.  He is not so much the Guardian of Night as he is the Guardian of _Darkness_. . .of _Space and Time_.

“Pitch is the rightful Guardian of the Night. . .when he attacked Aster he was stripped of his privileges like his older sister.  When he retaliated, Moon had no choice but to banish him to the darkness he loathed. . .because that was his Nightmare.  His Nightmare was being forgotten. . . people being unafraid and not believing in _him_.

“Moon did not have the strength to kill his sibling, but tried to lock Pitch away.  Sunny remained in her domain on the Sun and never again interfered with the other Guardians.  She did not want the responsibility.  But, Pitch. . .”

Jamie winced.  The images changed back to the three Master Guardians standing beside their respective domains.  He shook his head.

“Moon was right when he told you Pitch wanted more than what he had already.  When he attacked _Earth_. . .Moon had no choice but to call in the only Guardian that could deal with him.”

Jack was surprised again.

“Excuse me?”

Jamie smiled at his lover.

“You did not realise you were a Guardian the entire time, Jack.” he said softly. “There was a reason.  If Pitch did not realise what you were, then Moon could hide you from him for many, many years without him trying to kill you.”

Jack was shocked.

“Pitch didn’t know I existed until Moon told the other Guardians to _recruit_ me!?”

Jamie nodded.

“The minute Moon revealed the newest Guardian, Pitch was immediately made aware of the danger to his plans.  That is why he tried to corrupt you, Jack.” he answered gently. “He was trying to use your youth against you.  He thought that youth meant stupidity.

“His attitude has changed quite a bit since meeting you, Jack Frost.”

Jack tried to wrap his head around this information as Jamie’s hair began turning white at the roots.  His skin started to pale and the images shifted on the floor.

“To protect his Guardians, Moon took over the position of Guardian of the Night.  In the end, he would remain in this capacity forever; but by taking so much responsibility on himself he weakened his body tremendously.”

“That is why he cannot leave the Moon.” Jack whispered.

Jamie nodded again.

“Even when he appears on Earth, it is never in his true form.” he said softly. “He meditates and sends his conscious self in his place.  It still takes a lot out of him and can be dangerous.  He’s only been to the Earth twice.

“Once to survey the damage done to Bunny’s homeland, and once to retrieve you from your despair.”

“Wouldn’t it be three now?” Jack asked softly. “You saw him on the pond. . .you and Sophie both did.  I felt him there.”

“Sophie saw him through me.” Jamie admitted. “I saw him because I am his priest.  I realised that when he had advised that he understood my pain.”

Jack sat up straighter and looked at Jamie while the human smiled faintly.  He shook his head and turned Jamie’s face toward his.

“What do you mean, Jamie?” he asked softly.

Jamie’s eyes were translucent like Moon’s would look.  His hair was soft white and there was a gentle light emanating from him.  He smiled again and tilted his head.

“You are clever, too, Jack.” he mused. “What do you think I mean?”

Jack’s eyes narrowed.

“Are you saying. . .that Moon. . .knows. . .has _been through_ abuse like what I saw in your nightmare?”

Jamie nodded.

“How!?  From whom!?” Jack cried softly. “If he is the highest Guardian there is, who could have overpowered him!?”

“What can be stronger than Light, Jack?” Jamie asked back. “What can overpower the sun when it goes dark in the middle of the day?”

Jack’s eyes filled with tears.  He wasn’t sure why.  He didn’t know if it was because he felt sorry for Moon or because Jamie had to recount his own horrors because of Moon.  He clutched Jamie’s hands and shook his head.

“No. . .no, he couldn’t have, Jamie. . .there. . .there is NO WAY!”

“Pitch blocked Sunny’s sight from their older brother.” Jamie said softly.  “Knowing his brother was in a weakened state because of his new responsibilities, and because he still maintained the powers of dark through his manipulation of nightmares, he was able to infiltrate Moon’s domain when it resided on the surface.

“Moon was too weak to defend himself and he had no Guardian of his own to protect him.  Pitch did to him what he thought would cause Moon to allow that title of “Darkness” consume him.  If successful, Pitch would have had a stronger ally and the Guardians of Earth would have been destroyed.”

“Why!?” Jack asked angrily. “Why didn’t he SAY anything to us!? TO ME!?”

“He had told his first two Winter Guardians.” Jamie answered. “That is why he created the Guardian of Winter, Protector of Light, Fun and Hope.  It was his only defence.  He could not influence the Guardians of Earth to do much more than what he requested.

“Considering North and Sandy took Moon’s word as law, there was a deeply rooted notion of respect and dedication to whatever Moon said.  It was probably a good thing in the end.  It developed a sense of conduct that they taught to all future Guardians.

“The trouble with Moon creating the Guardian of Winter is that he created the position in an attempt to rid his heart of his darkness and bitterness.  He tried to save himself to keep the balance.  You must understand, Jack, that if Moon, Sunny or Pitch is destroyed, the scales tip and there will be chaos.”

Jack frowned.

“It sounds like Pitch deserves more than death.” he said sourly.

Jamie smiled faintly.

“Killing Pitch will not undo what he has done to Moon.  It will not bring back Aster’s family or his brethren.  It will not take away the memories of the battle you and I fought together 10 years ago either.”

“No, but he’d finally get what he fucking deserved.” Jack said angrily.

Jamie softly kissed Jack’s forehead and the Guardian calmed considerably.  He shook his head and looked back at the three, Master Guardians standing on the floor.

“It would not have been the first or last time it happened.” he murmured. “Why do you think Moon imprisoned him in his own domain, Jack?”

Jack was livid again.

“He’s done this SEVERAL TIMES!?”

Jamie drew his hand forward and pulled the images of Moon, Pitch and Sunny closer.  He placed Sunny above the others.

“Remember, Jack,” Jamie whispered eerily, “the Earth belongs to a Solar System governed by the laws and movements of the planets which orbit a single sun.  By Guardian law, this means that all other planets, asteroids and stars in this Solar System are governed by that one, single sun.”

He looked at the Guardian with a small smile.

“Following me?”

Jack nodded once.

“So, if Sunny can be a Master Guardian for Earth, she is a Master Guardian for Mars, Neptune, Pluto, Vesta, Betelgeuse or any smaller moon thereof.  Sunny is kind of like an omnipotent Guardian.  She knows her realm is large and her allegiances wide.

“She doesn’t have to fear Pitch because Earth is only one feather in her helmet.  Pitch would never have enough power to defeat her entirely.  A Master Guardian is only as strong as the Guardians they choose to protect their planets.   It is the duty of all beings of the Moon to protect the beings of Earth.

“That is the law across the board.  It is why all people of the Moon share the same symbol.  The Moon has longevity and light that shines constantly even when the sun does not.  Earth may be closer to Sunny’s heart because her brothers happen to be caught up with it, but she tried to assist Moon by taking on Earth Guardians.

“She was halfway across the Solar System when Pitch attacked Aster.  Even when she heard his distress, it was too late for her to do anything to stop it.  To avoid another incident, she agreed to stay in her own Domain of Summer and rule from the Sun.  And, as I have said, that is where she’s been ever since.”

“She doesn’t leave at all?” Jack asked.

Jamie shook his head.

“No.  She has not left the sun’s surface in over a thousand years.”

The figure of Sunny disappeared and Moon and Pitch stood beside one another.

“What you must understand about Moon and Pitch is that they are not _just_ brothers.  They are _twins_.”


	18. The Truth About the Moon and the Earth

Jack’s jaw dropped open.

“Bullshit.”

Jamie smiled.

“No, I’m afraid not.” he said softly. “Pitch’s name has not always been Pitch, Jack.  And Man in the Moon was not always the _Man_ in the Moon.”

This startled the Winter Guardian and he stared at Jamie, dumbfounded.

Jamie touched the staff and time swam backward.  The Earth Guardians changed save for Sandy.  Above them stood a very tall, young woman that looked like Moon in every single way except for the ornate dress and longer hair.  Beside her stood a more defined version of whatever the hell Pitch must have looked like before he became what he was today.

“Is. . .that?”

Jamie nodded.

“Moon used to be the Maiden in the Moon, Luna.  She was the Guardian of the Moon.  She worshipped its main Goddess, Selene.  She was the Protector of a great dynasty that protected the people of Earth.  Beside her, born at exactly the same time from the same star, was her brother, Master Guardian of Earth, Vale.”

Jack tilted his head and stared at the tall, cross armed Guardian standing beside Luna.  He was not dark at all.  His skin was a healthy tanned colour and his hair was dark brown and very long. He wore armour that reflected the blue and green colours of the Earth that he served.  A dark, blue cloak hung over the shoulder armour and his smile was cunning while his blue eyes were quick.

“THAT. . .was PITCH?”

Jamie nodded again.

“Luna had no Guardians of her own.  She _was the Guardian_.  It was her responsibility to protect the people of the Moon in ancient times.  She did not interact with anyone other than Selene and only when Selene requested her presence.  The only time she interacted with her brother was when he left Earth to come to her.”

Jack glared.

“Did he take advantage of her then, too?” he hissed.

“No.  Guardian Vale loved his sister, Luna.  She was everything to him.  He had convinced her to come with him to Earth and become a Guardian for him.  He needed someone to protect the sanctity of Winter.  He had not found anyone that could connect to the Moon, the Darkness or the task better.

“Luna would always refuse, happier to stay with Selene and continue her vigilance. Vale would always leave, promising he would be back for her.  Luna would always respond that she would be waiting for him.”

Jamie looked down for a moment.

Jack took in this silence before frowning and looking up at the two Guardians.

“Until the time she wasn’t. . .right?”

Jamie nodded.

“Yes.” he whispered.

He was silent for a moment, Moon’s memories catching up behind his eyes.  He could feel the pain and the terror that had caused Pitch to turn into what he was.  When he saw the story from both sides, he actually felt sorry for him.

“There was a great battle on the Moon.” Jamie said softly. “This battle, it took many lives.  The Darkness that swept through destroyed nearly everything.  Luna fought with everything she had to defend her Goddess.  Selene was the holder of a very special crystal.  This crystal provided life and longevity to her people and gave protection to the Earth.

“This crystal has always been at the center of any Dark attack.  During battle, Luna was mortally wounded.  Sensing her distress, Vale left Earth unguarded and came to the Moon for her.  When the Darkness could not break Selene from the crystal she possessed, it turned to the defenceless Earth.”

Jamie moved the images out of the way and showed the progression of the battle from Moon’s memories in front of them.  He watched Jack take this in before saying anything else.

“The Darkness surrounded Earth.  It covered the lands and the seas.  It turned water to brimstone and crops to dust.  It choked Sunny’s light from the atmosphere.  By the time Sunny realised there was something wrong, it was too late to save Earth from its fate.

“Vale found Luna slain.  He had been unable to save or protect her. . .and he became angry, bitter and hateful.  His sister was half of his soul.  It had been ripped from him and he wanted blood for her sacrifice.”

“He turned on Selene next.”

Jack’s voice was soft when he watched the battle progress.  He saw a very small, slender woman with long, platinum white ponytails hold up a brilliant crystal in between her hands.  He gasped and looked at Jamie.

“I’ve seen this before!” he said suddenly. “Moon, he was speaking to this table of crystals and it showed him this exact crystal.”

Jamie nodded.

“The Imperial Silver Crystal is what it was called in Luna’s time.” he said softly. “I think it is called the Silver Millennium Crystal now.”

“Where is the crystal now?” Jack asked. “Moon still visits a woman named Selene.”

“He calls her that, but it isn’t Selene.  Selene perished saving him and Vale. . .well, Pitch.”

Jack looked at Jamie, hurt.

“What?”

“The woman Moon calls Selene is Serenity.” Jamie answered. “Serenity is the descendant of Selene.  She is the protector of the crystal right now.  Whenever darkness threatens the Earth or the Moon, it is the Moon’s responsibility to protect it.”

Jack glared and grabbed Jamie’s hands in his.

“You aren’t doing anything to save me over yourself.” he warned dangerously.

Jamie smiled softly.

“You aren’t just any Earth Guardian, Jack.” he whispered. “Hadn’t you figured that out when you became the Blue Moon Guardian?”

Jack was startled.

Jamie laughed and shook his head.

“You were the priest of the Moon, Jack.  Moon chose you to keep watch on things here.  You were the sleeping Guardian.  It was your spirit. . .your center that Moon loved so much.  That’s why he saved you.  Moon chose to make you Jack Frost knowing he would need you later to help Earth. . .but that doesn’t mean you are like the others.

“You aren’t.  Your allegiances are tied to _him_ , not here.”

Jack did not say anything.  He looked away for a moment before shaking his head and looking back at Jamie.

“This. . .is starting to make less and less sense.” he said finally.

Jamie nodded.

“That’s why Moon never told you what your purpose was, Jack.” he answered. “It was easier for you to stumble into it on your own.”

Jack snorted.

“Real classy of him.”

Jamie ran his hand through Jack’s hair and smiled.

“If you hadn’t been allowed to go through those first 300 years as you had, then you wouldn’t have met _me_ , Jack.”

Jack’s face eased back into a small smile when he nodded.

“That’s true.” he admitted. “I would have regretted that most of all, Jamie.”

“Besides, the Moon and the Earth are always connected, but the crystal the Moon Guardians weld is swayed by the emotions of the person welding it.  When it was in Selene’s hands she was devastated by the carnage and destruction of her home and the Earth.  She lamented the loss of her warrior Guardian, Luna.

“But in addition to that, she felt a deeply rooted hatred and resentment toward the Master Guardian of Earth, Vale, for abandoning his post when he knew he had strict instructions to stay and guard it at all costs.  By leaving Earth he left it open for attack and the Darkness took it.

“To protect Earth and punish Vale, Selene used the Imperial Crystal to destroy the remnants of her home and send Luna into the future of the Moon.  She sent her away in hopes she would be reincarnated into a better life.

“But because of the malice and hatred, the crystal was tainted with the darkness she so desperately tried to avoid.  When she attacked Vale, she banished him to Earth for all time, stripping him of his Master Guardian status and turning him into the darkness he had let consume the planet and people he was meant to protect.

“She locked away his memories of Luna or his former life.  She sent him spiraling into the darkness, twisted, frightening and horrifying.  In the darkness of the Earth, he rose from the shadows to become feared by the very people he used to love.”

Jack shook his head when Luna vanished and Vale’s form transformed into Pitch’s current form.

“There’s. . .no way.” he breathed.

“She hadn’t intended for him to bond with the darkness like he did, but with the crystal’s powers misguided, she created a sleeping monster.  When he awoke on Earth, there was chaos and fear. There were nightmares around every corner.  There was no happiness. . .there was no hope.

“Black Jack, the pestilence. . .the stuff of nightmares. . .the Boogeyman?  These are all names that the being known as _Pitch_ would eventually be known by as time went onward.”

Jamie watched the Moon continue silently around the Earth in front of them.  He gestured to a spot on the Moon.

“This is the Sea of Serenity.  This is where Selene had her kingdom.  When she exhausted the last of the energy of the crystal, it shattered and was sent into the future with Luna.  When Luna was reborn several centuries later, she was known as the Man in the Moon.  Moon was able to repair the damaged crystal and returned it to the next descendants that had ascended in Selene’s abdication.

“The Silver Millennium was born on the Moon.  When Queen Serenity took the crystal and began caring for it that is when the memories of his former life came back to him.  Moon retreated to the very center of the planet and remained there.  He could not make the same mistake by involving himself with the Protectors again.

“He knew the Earth would suffer just as it had previously.  Instead, he summoned what magic Selene had given to him and created the crystal table you saw.  It is his only link to the one, true Selene that he remembers.  He doesn’t realise that, but that is what gives him the visions and moves the crystals.

“The Goddess Selene is the one who told him to choose you and to intervene when you and I got separated.  The crystal in his staff actually holds a shard of the original, Imperial Crystal.”

Jack looked back at Earth and shook his head.

“Then, why can’t Pitch remember?” he asked softly.

“In Pitch’s mind, he has always been Pitch, remember?” Jamie asked quietly.  “He enjoyed the chaos, fear and nightmares.  He was happy to facilitate the pain because he was sent to Earth in punishment for forcing the same on the entire planet.  It was his only thinking that, that was his purpose.  Unlike you, Jack, Pitch has never doubted he is what he is in the now.

“Unless Pitch has a triggering moment, he will never remember he was once a Master Guardian of All Earth.”

Jack smiled sadly.

“Hmm. . .he always used to hate that no one respected him.” he murmured. “He hated that the darkness was all he was good for . . . when in the beginning, he was the ONLY Guardian for Earth.”

Jamie nodded.

“Exactly.”

Jack sighed and looked at Moon standing in his domain from Jamie’s images.  He shook his head and looked at his lover.

“If Moon knows the truth why does he sit by and allow Pitch to USE him like he does!?  Why doesn’t Moon tell Pitch who he is!?”

“Pitch wouldn’t believe him.” Jamie answered. “And as to why he allows Pitch to harm him, the answer is complicated.”

Jack looked at Jamie carefully before turning back to the images.

“Is this where the original Four Guardians come into existence?”

Jamie nodded.

“When Moon summoned the powers of Selene, he used the pureness of heart and conviction to send four, loving spirits to the world of Earth.  With them these spirits carried hope, wonder, new beginnings and good memories of the past.  Their powers, combined, allowed them to overpower Pitch and return him to the shadows as Selene had intended.

“Once Pitch realised he held no power on Earth, he tried to retaliate by returning to the Moon.”

“How could he have known the way!?” Jack asked incredulously.

“Because the Moon is nothing but dark and shadows where Moon lives.” Jamie answered softly. “And because of Pitch’s adaptation of the shadows, he didn’t need to know that he already knew the way. . .all he needed to do was feel through the shadows to the source of the power that had sent the Guardians to Earth.”

“Are you telling me that Pitch would have never _realised_ he was a Master Guardian if Moon hadn’t SAID SOMETHING?” Jack asked dangerously. “Did Moon TELL him something!?”

Jamie hesitated before moving the images away and revealing the image of Pitch and Moon meeting for the first time.  He stared quietly for a moment while Moon’s memories filled in the blanks.  It was starting to make perfect sense to him now.

He knew why Moon could not keep a Winter Guardian to save his life.

“When Pitch confronted Moon, there was a moment of clarity in which Pitch recognised him.  In that flickering, Pitch’s memory was going to return.  Unable to bear what may happen if Pitch were to remember, Moon tried to prevent the memories from coming back by re-writing them.” Jamie answered aloud.

“He erased any memory of Luna or Vale and he convinced Pitch that he was the younger brother of a trio of Master Guardians sent to protect the Planet Earth.  He told Pitch that he was the Guardian of Shadow, of Dark and Nightmares.  To have balance, there must be light with the dark.  Pitch had reigned unopposed for centuries.

“Now, it was time to restore balance.”

“I’m guessing Pitch didn’t see it that way?” Jack asked.

“Pitch took to the re-written memories as if they were truth.” Jamie answered instead. “He fully accepted that Moon must be who he said he was, but it did not change his mind that _he_ had Earth first and it gave Moon no right to take from him.

“There was an altercation in which Moon was severely injured defending himself from Pitch’s attacks.  It proved more detrimental for Pitch, however, because he had no more belief to feed from once he was done.  With his powers exhausted, Moon banished him to the Other World.  Pitch remained there until the attack on the Warren.

“The trouble with Moon re-writing memories is that the _real_ memories had already been collected and stored. . .just like all of them are _now._ ”

Jamie looked at Jack knowingly.

Jack winced.

“Tooth Fairy.” he said softly.  “Pitch’s memories are with _her_.”

“They were.” Jamie admitted. “But they aren’t anymore. . .they weren’t when you and the Guardians battled him the second time.  They had been given to the Man in the Moon as part of Tooth Fairy’s initiation. Moon still has them. . .but over time, Pitch has learned that his exist. He’s learned from you, from other Winter Guardians. . .he knows his brother is not what he seems.

“I believe that is why Pitch assaults him when he is able and why Moon accepts his punishment. As long as Moon can hold onto those memories, there is no threat.  But as soon as Pitch remembers who he was. . .there is no knowing what that may do to him.”

“I have a few good guesses.” Jack muttered.

He turned back to Jamie.

“The Winter Guardians before me, though. . .what does all of _this_ have to do with _that_?  I mean, this sounds like something for North and Sandy to hear!”

“Sandy already knows the story, Jack.  You know that.” Jamie said softly. “Sandy is older than Moon is.  Sandy comes from parts of the cosmos that span light years in distance.  His entire being is comprised of stardust, cosmic energy and light.  After the destruction of Selene’s kingdom, and the loss of Luna and Vale, Sandy promised Selene to protect Moon in the future.

“He waited on the moon in the Sea of Serenity until Moon returned the crystal to its rightful owner.  He then took a Guardian role in order to keep his true intentions under wraps.”

“That Old Man has more to him than it looks, hmm?” Jack asked faintly.

Jamie nodded.

“The details of Sandy’s life are far greater than what I know.” he answered. “But he is Moon’s loyalist friend.  He would not betray him unless it was in his best interest.”

Jack smiled and held Jamie closer.

“I’m glad he knows the difference.”

Jack paused before looking at the image frozen in front of him.

“Was there a Guardian of Winter then?”

“At the time, no.” Jamie admitted.  “But as the first four settled into their routines, other spirits and Guardians came to assist from other planets.  Some stayed on Earth and continued on here.  Others returned home after Earth’s situation had improved.

“After a few decades, Moon began to notice that Pitch had a resurgence when winter months struck the world.  The Moon’s light was not strong enough to drive off all of the shadows.  The nights were often longer and the cold did not help matters.

“It caused depression, sadness and desolation.  Moon realised that if he left it unheeded, Pitch may use it to his advantage.  So, Moon dispatched a fifth Guardian that was held in the same capacity as the first four.  They understood that this Guardian was to protect the spirit of Winter by helping North keep the magic in it all winter long.”


	19. The First Four Guardians of Winter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not a fan of Disney's "Frozen." Not at all. . .but. . .this worked. . .and in this capacity I think I tolerated it well enough. No one can do ice and snow like Jack Frost, though. :)

Jamie hesitated before shaking his head.

“The first Guardian was a young woman who had been lost to illness.” he murmured. “She was called the Sugar Plum Fairy.  She served beautifully until a run in with Pitch left her doubtful of her own existence.  Before Moon could intervene, Pitch moved in and killed her like he tried with you.

“He crushed the crystal light that she used to spread hope and cheer in order to drain the light from her body.  The darkness consumed her and she was lost.”

Jack winced terribly.  His heart ached in his chest and he felt his hand rub it painfully.

“That’s. . .horrible.”

“Moon felt horrible about it, too.” Jamie murmured. “He had not realised that Pitch would attempt to break his Guardians of their light and will.  Instead of waiting and planning a new attack, Moon chose another Guardian quickly.  This time, it was an older man who had died in the cold from hypothermia.”

“Old Man Winter.” Jack whispered.

Jamie nodded.

“Old Man Winter was a mistake from the beginning.  The man was incredibly bitter and all too ready to accept Pitch’s offer of a partnership.  The two of them ravaged the lands buried in snow by freezing water solid and choking off any hope of food or survival.  The darkness brought death with it every day.

“The tyranny drew the ire of the other, Four Guardians and Moon had no choice but to destroy the Guardian he had created.  He ripped him apart limb from limb with the light that calls Guardians to their cause.  It was the first time Moon had to use murder to get the end results.”

Jack shuddered.

“And the third?”

Jamie smiled.

“Was Moon’s greatest achievement until you came along, Jack.” he said softly.

He carefully touched the staff and watched ice crystals glitter across the floor.  They swirled in a bright, blue dome before exploding outward.  A beautiful woman in a blue dress and with long, blonde hair laughed as she sent snow in all directions.

“Her real name was Elsa.” Jamie said fondly. “But Moon called her Queen Frostine.”

“Isn’t that the name of the Queen in your Candy Land game?” Jack asked playfully.

“She has many names and she has a rich heritage in Europe where her story was born.  It was said she lived with the powers to create snow; but Moon was the one that gave her those powers after she contracted a fever that spiraled out of control.

“Her spirit was infallible, like yours.”

Jamie smiled again and looked down at Jack.  He gently put his hand against his lover’s cheek and enjoyed Jack’s dark blue eyes.  He nodded and looked at the image of the young woman.

“Frostine enjoyed her job.  She took pride in it.  She had but the power of her heart and the spirit inside of her.  She did not have a weapon or any defence.  The power of winter _was_ her defence.  When Pitch tried the same tricks he had with the first, two Guardians, he found that Frostine was far more powerful than he anticipated.

“She spread a strange kind of wonder across the world for winter.  It was when children began to lose fear and began to enjoy it.  They started sledding, skating, hockey and all sorts of activities that could only be done in winter.  The fear turned to happiness. . .fun!  Just like you, Jack. . .Frostine created the belief in the wonder of Winter.

“She chased the darkness away.”

Jack winced when Jamie fell silent.  He pulled himself over the staff so he was in Jamie’s lap.  He put both arms around his lover and looked up at him.

“Why do I have a feeling that this. . .really ended badly?”

“When Pitch could not defeat Frostine, he turned his focus back to Moon.” Jamie answered softly. “Pitch knew he held some kind of power over the brother that was his light to his dark.  He relished inflicting pain and suffering, Jack.  Moon would never hurt Pitch for fear of his life being in danger or for him finding out who he was.

“But Moon did not have protection in those days.  His Guardian of Winter acted solely as the Guardian on Earth.  They were chosen as the other four had been.  Moon could have cried out as loud as he wanted and Frostine would not have heard him.”

Jack frowned and shook his head.

“Jamie?”

“Pitch beat Moon within an inch of his life.” Jamie whispered. “He stole from him what was stolen from me, he beat him and he drained him of just about every ounce of light he had.  When he was at the brink of Death, he forced Moon to call his Guardian of Winter.

“Moon refused.  He refused for three days until Pitch threatened to drag him to Earth where he would surely die, being so devoid of energy.  Moon resisted.  Finally, Pitch stretched the shadows out from the Moon to Earth.”

“How!?” Jack asked incredulously.

“He blocked out the Sun.” Jamie answered.

Jack’s eyes widened.  The sapphire in his forehead shimmered.  He shook his head.

“A Lunar Eclipse.”

Jamie nodded.

“He forced the Moon over the Sun and told Frostine he would kill the Man in the Moon if she did not surrender.  All of the Guardians heard this threat.  Moon was too weak to dissuade her.  Before the others could find her, and before Sandy could return to the Moon to save Moon. . .”

He stopped, tears sliding down his face.  He painfully put his hand over his lips.  He shook his head when Jack scrambled upright and put his hands against Jamie’s face.

“. . .Frostine loved Moon more than she ever told him.” he breathed. “She didn’t just _love_ him. She was _in love_ with him.  Without any questions, complaints or hesitations, she impaled herself on an icicle dagger that she created with her power.

“To attack oneself with the light given by the Moon is akin to mutiny.  Frostine died a slow, painful death while the light was bled from her.  By the time any of the other Guardians found her, she was beyond saving.  They brought her to the Pole where they watched over her until she passed.

“They had agreed to take her last words to Moon.  They had given them to him as they did everything and Sandy retrieved them after he had dispatched Pitch.  He stayed with Moon until the Master Guardian was recovered enough to stand and speak on his own.

“He gave Frostine’s letter to him and it devastated Moon.  It completely. . .destroyed him, Jack. It tore out his heart and he could not bear the pain it caused.  Losing Frostine brought a cold pall over the next several decades of winters.  Pitch once again regained control of the season and raged war.

“It took those long decades for Moon to get over Frostine’s loss.  He will never tell North or the others, but he did have Sandy bring her from the Pole to the Moon where she rests in the Sea of Serenity under the protection of the Moon Guardians.”

Jack felt tears under his eyes and looked away, shocked.  He stared at the young, vibrant woman in the swirls of snow and ice.  He felt an ache worse than before shoot through his chest.  He suddenly felt very, very small.

“I am scared to ask about the fourth.” he breathed.

“The fourth was. . .an accident.”

Jamie sighed and looked down, sullen.

“They were never meant to be the Guardian of Winter. . .it was Moon’s first attempt at creating a Priest or Priestess position to serve in his stead on Earth.  They were supposed to take his words and relay them to the other Guardians.”

“Then, what happened?” Jack asked, confused.

Jamie frowned and looked down before wiping away the image of Frostine and bringing up the image of a tall, pale woman with long, black hair.  The woman’s eyes were a frosted blue.

“She was blind.” Jack breathed.

Jamie nodded.

“Her name was Fuuyuu.” he said gently. “She was a young, Japanese miko that had died in a fire during winter.  She had saved her little brother and sister from the fire, and when returning for their father, she became trapped.

“Moon chose her because she possessed strong powers already.  She was quiet, reserved and was happy to remain in one place.”

“One place?” Jack interrupted.

“The Pole.”

Jack was startled.

“With North!?”

“It was Moon’s heartache from Frostine that prevented him from trusting another Guardian by themselves.  He knew that Pitch had a strangle-hold on the Winter Season.  He could not afford to put another in the position to be a Winter Guardian while that was true.

“At least under a more experienced Guardian’s care, Moon could take comfort that Fuuyuu could interpret his will in peace and from fear of attack.  That worked for them for a while. . .until Pitch realised he was losing his influence over Winter by some unseen or unknown force.  The more he lost, the angrier he became.

“He tried to attack Moon again, but Fuuyuu was an amazing priestess.  She sensed the danger immediately and Sandy was waiting for him.  Thwarted, Pitch returned to his domain and began to search.  He scoured the Earth on the Map he was able to create.  He’d been able to do amazing things that his former self was capable of doing, but he did not know how. 

“He assumed it was because he was Moon’s brother.  After three more years, Pitch finally honed in on Fuuyuu’s presence on the Pole.  He attacked without warning.  He ran rampant over the castle while North was on Christmas duty.

“Though they fought valiantly, the Yeti clan was not enough to hold Pitch back.  Pitch destroyed half of the castle before uncovering Fuuyuu’s chamber. Again, she was waiting for him.  She was an amazing sword wielder.  Pitch did not realise she was blind until he had struck her fatally.”

“She. . .fought him. . .without sight!?” Jack asked painfully. “By herself!?”

Jamie nodded.

“Fuuyuu gave Moon the solitary comfort of her loyalty and her powers.  She entrusted her soul to the spirit of Winter.  That is why I say it was an accident she became a Guardian at all.  But by giving herself so willingly, she recreated what you and I have done. 

“Single-handedly she secured Winter’s safety until Moon could locate a soul strong enough and a heart caring enough to embrace the Winter’s core principles as Moon had fallen in love with them.”

Jamie smiled now and turned to Jack.  He carefully put his hands against the Guardian’s face.  Jack kept his eyes glued to Jamie’s.  He felt his body shaking when Jamie’s eyes turned a bright white and the moon crescent lit up on his forehead.

_“In the name of the Moon I pray.  I pray to all Guardians of the Earth and the Guardians and Spirits of the Future.  Keep the Spirit of Winter alive in your hearts.  Keep the center of the season close to you and alive until the rightful owner comes from unseen sources._

_“Keep the spirit of starlight, moonlight, firelight and winterlight strong in your hearts.  Keep the candle burning for the soul that shall cross this Earth in a century’s time. Prepare for the time when the center of Winter’s heart returns to watch over that which we have come to covet and enjoy.  Keep the hope of laughter, fun and wonder in the season._

_“At the turn of 100 years the Winter Guardian shall return and he will bring with him the tools necessary to banish the darkness forever.  In this I pray, for now and forever.”_

Jack turned when the fourth Guardian changed to his image.  He felt his chest grow unbearably tight.  He looked down at the staff as it returned to normal and the images faded.  He shook his head and clung to Jamie.

“I don’t UNDERSTAND!” he cried softly.  “I. . .I was. . .useless. . .ALONE. . .for 300 years!”

Jamie’s eyes cleared and he smiled warmly.

“You had Sugar Plum Fairy’s wonder and her light.  You spread the joy and wonder of Winter.  In Old Man Winter his strength was controlling snow and ice, which you did. . .that is why you have your staff, Jack. 

“Frostine gave you the most important tools of all. . .your love of fun, adventure, risk and laughter.  She gave you the ability to spread that power to everyone around you no matter how dire the circumstances or consequences.

“Fuuyuu predicted you would come to Moon.  She gave him the goddamn common sense to wait for the right moment.  This is why you _stayed in the dark, blind_ , about who you WERE.  She also gave you her powerful sense of _guardianship_.  You died to save your sister, Jack.  You would have died to save _me_.”

Jamie lifted Jack’s head and brushed the tears out of his eyes.  He smiled.

“You are the reason that there will never be a need for another Winter Guardian or Priestess ever again, Jack.  You set them all free. . .and you set Moon free. . .you may have even set _Pitch_ free. . .in one of the best ways a Boogeyman can be set free.”

“How’s that!?” Jack sniffled almost hatefully.

Jamie pressed his lips to Jack’s ear.

“You showed him he does not have to be seen to exist.” he murmured. “You proved that those who lacked the will at one time may always gain it again.”

Jack looked at Jamie wearily before putting his arms around the human and pulling him into his chest. He kissed the side of his lover’s face and simply held him.  He felt the warmth from Jamie’s embrace encircle his waist.  He held on tighter.

“I won’t fail.” he said finally.  “I won’t let them die in vain.”

Jamie smiled faintly.

“You’ve already set them free, Jack.  You’ve won.”

Jack held Jamie tighter and cried.

If this night got any better he wouldn’t believe Jamie anymore when he told him it was real.


	20. Mathematically Correct

There was sunlight drifting into the room when Jack roused the next morning.  He had to squint against the brightness and remember where the hell he was.  His hair was tousled around his face and his eyes were still heavy with sleep.

He sat up in Jamie’s bed and rubbed his eyes.

What had happened after Jamie had told him about the other Guardians of Winter?

Jack started when he realised Jamie was missing.  He looked around, worriedly, before seeing Jamie sitting in his desk chair with his head on his arms on the desk.  He got to his feet and went to him and was surprised to see several textbooks open beneath Jamie’s arms.

“Jesus. . .did you watch over _me_ while _I_ slept, Jamie?”

Jack’s hand gently pushed Jamie’s bangs away from his forehead.  He frowned when Jamie’s fever bit back at him.  He heard Jamie murmur something in his sleep before his cheek shifted on his arm.

The Winter Guardian looked at the small, scar like resemblance of the moon crescent that had been on his forehead last night.  Jack was surprised by this.  He wouldn’t have imagined that it would have left him with a physical affliction.

He was about to wake Jamie up so he could drag him back to his bed when he caught sight of his reflection in the frost.  His eyes widened when he put his other hand against his forehead.  The Blue Moon.  It was still there.  It shouldn’t be.  Why was it still there?

Jack turned and looked at his staff.  It was still covered in indigo coloured ice and frost.  He shook his head.

“It shouldn’t be.” he said softly.

“It wouldn’t have. . .” Jamie whispered hoarsely. “. . .if you had kept a hold of the Moon part, too.”

Jack turned and looked down at Jamie when the human coughed and slowly pulled himself upright.  He could see that the letters from last night were gone.  Instead, there were difficult scientific formulas that Jamie had been writing under the human’s hand.

Jamie’s cheeks were flushed a bright red and his eyes were a cloudy clay colour.  He smiled at Jack and shook his head.

“When I initiated the transformation last night I made it permanent.”

Jack shook his head and knelt down in front of Jamie.

“Jamie!  That. . .that would take a power as strong as Moon’s!”

He stopped and winced.

Jamie laughed softly.

“I am the priest of the Moon, remember?” he asked aloud. “And, yes, it was with his help.”

Jack winced.

“Jamie, you shouldn’t have done that.  It’s made the illness in your physical body worse!”

“The only way I could ensure I’d never break your heart again was to give it to you completely. I could only do that in the Blue Moon form.  If the Blue Moon Jack Frost only appeared on the Solstice, that would be torture, wouldn’t it?”

Jamie smiled again and leaned his head against his raised arm.  He waited until Jack got done with the conflict in his head before saying anything else.

“Besides, Jack, I was sick before you saw me.”

“I know that, now.” Jack said irritably. “I didn’t want to make it worse.”

“You didn’t.”

Jamie dropped his arm and slowly closed the lab he’d been working on after he could not sleep. He’d spent most of the night reassuring Jack.  He’d expected the stories about the Winter Guardians to upset him.  Moon had been leery to tell him and thus gave him the job.

In Jamie’s opinion, Jack deserved to know.  Jack deserved to understand _why_ it was important he spent 300 years never knowing who he was or what he was destined to do.  It made up for all of the loneliness and pain that Moon had put him through.  It was an explanation that was long overdue.

“Is this what you do when you cannot sleep?”

Jamie looked down at Jack when the Guardian set his head against his lap.  The welcome chill raced up his torso when Jack’s fingers touched his exposed abdominal muscles.  He smiled halfheartedly.

“Yeah.” he murmured. “After the incident, I couldn’t really function as a whole person anymore. To keep up in school and to keep the nightmares at bay, I studied.  I would do labs and assignments months before the lessons were taught.  By the time the teacher taught the lesson, I was pretty much into the next chapter.”

Jack winced and heard the wheeze in Jamie’s lungs when the human coughed again.  He pressed his cheek harder into Jamie’s legs.  He felt the fever fight back.

“You are really sick, kiddo.”

Jamie laughed.

“Aren’t I a _little_ old for you to be calling me that?”

Jack smiled and sent his chin on his arms so he could look up at his lover.

“I think it’s endearing.” he answered.

“Bunny doesn’t call Sophie an ankle biter anymore.” Jamie answered back.

“Not to her face.” Jack retorted.

Jamie laughed until it descended into a horrible cough.

Jack stood up when Jamie curled over and his face turned red from the effort.  He felt panicked.

“JAMIE! THAT WINDOW BETTER BE SHUT!”

Jamie waved Jack away and gasped for breath when the coughing fit subsided.  He turned to his door.

“It is, Dad!” he called back as best as he could.

He turned around and opened his dresser and dug around in one of the drawers, muttering to himself.  He pulled out a grey, long sleeved shirt and pulled it over his head.  It came down to his hips over the green, plaid pajama pants he’d put on last night.

Jamie looked at Jack for a moment before returning to his dresser.  He closed the drawer he was in and dug around in another.

“You aren’t allowed to go anywhere, right?”

Jack shook his head.

“I’m supposed to stay with you.” he answered honestly.

He caught the blue shirt and pajama pants that Jamie tossed to him and looked at the human surprised.

Jamie smiled.

“No point in staying something I can’t just rip off of you.” he said softly.

Jack grinned.

“That should be what I tell _you_.”

Jamie smiled again before getting to his feet.

“I am pretty sure I heard Mom calling the doctor this morning.  If I had to bet money, I’d say Sophie and I are going there today.”

“You say it like it’s a bad thing.” Jack said pulling the shirt over his head.

“My family doctor is likely to notice a lot more than a campus doctor.” Jamie sighed.  “He’ll know I haven’t been sleeping and then I’ll be up shit creek for sure.”

Jack finished dressing before sighing and looking at Jamie carefully.

“Jamie, you have to get well.  You cannot protect a Guardian of _my_ caliber without your health.”

Jamie grinned and pulled Jack closer to him.  He relished the intense cold that battled back the fire that had been raging since last night.  He nodded.

“Which is why I’m going to the damn doctor, right?” he asked.

Jack smiled faintly.

“Your parents are worried, that’s all.  I brought you in here last night looking like a dead fish.”

Jamie was startled.

“You did?”

Jack nodded.

“Moon’s Mark.  It helps those with open minds and hearts to see what may otherwise be invisible to them.” he said softly. “Your mom and dad saw Bunny and me.”

Jamie’s head tilted to the side.

“They saw Bunny?”

“When he is running around in his human form they will always see him.” Jack answered. “Unless he learns how to control it again.  It may take the Old Man a little while to get the hang of the trick again.”

“What about _you_?”

Jack grinned at Jamie.

“I am very capable of making sure my Guardian isn’t _too_ embarrassed. They aren’t going to see me unless they need to see me.”

“This coming from the Guardian that wanted to be seen by everyone for almost 300 years.” Jamie countered playfully.

“Your parents are just worried about you, Jamie.” Jack said softly. “Don’t be too hard on them.  They just want to make sure you are okay.”

Jamie kissed the side of Jack’s face and shook his head.

“I’ll be okay, Jack.” he said softly. “I promise.”

Jack smiled faintly and watched Jamie go to the bedroom door.  He waited while Jamie unlocked the door, hesitated and then turned back around.

“You aren’t leaving, are you, Jack?”

Jack shook his head.

“North would kill me.” Jack answered.  “If he doesn’t see me here on Christmas Eve I can expect a real ass whipping.”

Jamie smiled and nodded.

“Let me run damage control before I get a lecture much longer than the one I’m about to get already.  I’ll be back when they’re done berating me.”

Jack smiled faintly when the door shut behind Jamie.

He turned and looked at the window.  He walked toward it and brushed the frost away with his hand.  He could see the sun shining against a brilliant blue sky.  The moon was still disappearing from view in the morning heavens.

Jack shook his head.

“You certainly gave me someone that will give me a challenge.” he mused softly. “I appreciate that.  It wouldn’t be worth it if it wasn’t a challenge. . .or at least a little fun.”

Jack smiled again when he heard Jamie start talking with his mother and father.  He heard Sophie start in on him shortly afterward.  He felt sorry for his Guardian.  Though well deserved, he knew Jamie was very ill.  He probably wasn’t catching half of what they were saying.

He sat down in the window seat beside the window and watched the snow.

That was okay, though.

He’d fill Jamie in on what he’d missed later.

They’d take care of _each other_ like they promised.


	21. Let's Be Honest

“Sophie is fine.  Same old, same old, I am afraid, Mrs. Bennett.  I have sent her prescriptions in to the pharmacy so she can begin treatment.  With it being Winter Break, she should be better in plenty of time before school starts.

“Jamie is a bit worse for the wear.  You say he was studying hard for finals, yes?  I understand his Major is demanding.  He is only a Sophomore.  He needs to be maintaining his weight and a healthy sleep schedule.  I understand he wants to work hard and do a good job, but it shouldn’t be at the expense of his health.

“I was hoping you might give me a few more minutes with him.”

Jamie sighed and looked around the examination room for what had to have been the third or fourth time.  He’d already had two breathing treatments and confirmed the suspicion about pneumonia.  After falling into the damn pond it didn’t surprise anyone; it didn’t even surprise _him_.

He looked up when a tall, aging doctor in his early 50s came back into the room with a chart that was at least an inch and a half thick.  He stared at the man easily enough and waited while the doctor opened the chart, sat back down and looked up at him kindly.

“Jamie, my boy. . .I know I’ve poked and prodded you enough for one day. . .but I was hoping you would humour me.”

“Do I have a choice?” Jamie asked hoarsely.

“Of course.” the doctor said putting his pen behind his ear.  His hair was a peppery black and his eyes a steel blue.  He looked at Jamie warmly. “You always have a choice, Jamie.  I’d never force you to tell me anything you didn’t want to tell me.”

Jamie hesitated before shaking his head and gesturing he was willing to listen.

Dr. Patrick Leon smiled again and looked at one of the patients he’d been seeing since birth.  He was fortunate to have a few patients like Jamie and Sophie Bennett.  He could say that the two children were as close to him as his own kids.  He enjoyed their energy when they were younger and their sense of belief as they grew older.

It hurt him on a personal level when such a patient was in distress and there was no clear explanation.

“Jamie, I understand that college is going pretty well, yes?”

“Yeah, I made honours for next year.” Jamie answered. “I worked hard to get into those classes.”

“What courses?”

“Calculus and Bio-Chemistry.” Jamie answered again.

“Bio-Chemistry.” whistled Dr. Leon. “That’s a doozy.”

He paused before sighing and closing Jamie’s chart.

“Jamie, I’ve been seeing you since you were born.  You may have gotten into a few unexplained accidents growing up, but nothing resembling what I see now.  You have symptoms that mimic someone I treat for severe depression, insomnia and anxiety.

“That worries me a bit considering I’ve never had one bit of worry about you until you walked into my office this morning with your mother and sister.  I understand you were feeling ill after finals and fell into that Pond near your house, but you are going to have to get up a bit earlier than that to fool me in regards to your weight and your sleep.”

Jamie looked away.

The nurse had about fallen over when she’d told him he only weighed 110 pounds.  He was 5’9”. He was a far cry from his typical body weight.  When Dr. Leon had examined him, the worry about getting found out had only gotten worse because he noticed his eyes immediately.

“College is stressful.” he answered automatically. “There have been things that have been difficult to do. . .and I’ve had to study hard.”

“Jamie. . .how about I tell it to _you_ straight and you tell me whatever it is you can tell _me_ straight?”

Dr. Leon leaned against the counter of the examination room and crossed his arms over his chest.  He watched Jamie sigh and slowly look at him.

“It isn’t something I want to talk about.” Jamie answered.

“Fair enough.  But there _is_ something, isn’t there. . .?” Dr. Leon asked.

Jamie nodded silently.

Dr. Leon thought for a moment before nodding.

“Medical school was the same way.” he murmured softly. “I went to school with a brilliant young woman who studied hard her whole life.  She had a magnificent mind.  She was a quick learner, too.  It made me jealous until I realised at what cost that intelligence came for her.”

Jamie felt compelled to look at the doctor and raised his head.

Dr. Leon smiled faintly.

“Her parents were alcoholics.  She’d moved out when she was 17 and paid her own way through undergraduate school, graduate school and medical school.  She was working two jobs and going to school full time in order to continue her studies.  Even though she was brilliant and had high marks, the all nighters and the stress eventually came down on her.

“She had a heart attack when she was only 32.  She died, Jamie.  Right as she was about to graduate and get the degree she had slaved for her entire life, her heart just couldn’t take anymore.  It killed me.  To watch someone who deserved so much from her hard work lose everything at the finish line was a bitterness I never could get over.

“The depression and sadness followed me into my last year of med school.  I almost did not graduate.  If not for her brother, who had begun to follow in her footsteps, I probably would have let myself fail out.  I would have gone back to the family farm and worked on hogs for the rest of my life.  Right now I’d be knee deep in pig shit rather than patients with colds.”

Jamie shook his head, eyes narrow.

“What. . .did he say. . .to make you want to graduate?” he asked softly.

“He told me his sister did not work her whole life for others to pity her.” Dr. Leon said softly. “She’d been proud of the work she did and even though it was bittersweet and terrible, she’d hate herself and others more if she knew her untimely death had caused pain for her fellow classmates and friends.”

Jamie started.

“You knew her very well, didn’t you?”

Dr. Leon nodded.

“She and I dated for several years.” he said. “Up until she died.”

Jamie felt his heart ache in his chest.  The doctor looked so calm and peaceful about such a horrible turn of events.  The smile across his face was one that was looking back on good memories, not bad.

He looked around almost desperately before wrapping his arms around himself.

“My Freshman year. . .during move in weekend. . .something happened.” he heard himself saying aloud. “It. . .was. . .traumatic.  I’d been assaulted. . .and couldn’t tell anyone about it. I didn’t want to. . .I shouldn’t have been where I was. I felt like an idiot.  I knew better than that.  You know. . .ever since. . .since I got tied to that tree. . .!  I shouldn't have been there!

“After that. . .I just. . .felt this horrible pain that wouldn’t go away!  It just. . .kept getting worse and worse.  When I tried to sleep I would have nightmares, so I would stay up all night studying to keep myself awake.  I stopped doing anything other than studying, going to class or existing. If my friends hadn’t seen me in class or on campus, they’d have thought I was dead.”

Dr. Leon took this in carefully before nodding.

“I thought it might be something traumatic.” he murmured. “But there is no reason you cannot go to someone, Jamie.  If you were hurt, the ones that hurt you do not deserve to get away with it.  Your life is worth no more or no less than another’s.  You have to trust in that.”

“I didn’t then.” Jamie answered.  “I understand better since coming home.”

“Was the pond an accident?”

Jamie shook his head.

“No.”

Dr. Leon nodded again.

“Didn’t think so.” he said gently.  “You can see the signs when you’ve been there yourself.”

Jamie looked up at his doctor strangely.

“What?"

Dr. Leon smiled and rolled up his shirt sleeve on his right arm.

There were deep, dark burns that ran from his wrist to his elbow.  Over the burns were deep, scarred cuts that had been self inflicted.  He watched Jamie’s reaction for a moment before speaking again.

“It is all right for there to be bitterness and pain, Jamie.” he said softly. “It is how we eventually deal with it that ultimately matters.  That decision will determine if we are able to continue or will fade away.”

Jamie winced and shook his head.

“I may have wanted to. . .to go before. . .but I don’t now.  I don’t want to _die_ , I just wanted the pain to _stop_.”

Dr. Leon nodded and rolled his sleeve back down to his wrist and buttoned it.  He reached behind his back and pulled out his prescription pad.

“I know I am more than a stone’s throw from your school,” he began softly, “but I happen to know a wonderful doctor that specialises in psychological trauma and treatment.  I also happen to have a cell phone I never turn off.  If this continues, I want you to call me or go to the doctor at his office.

“It shouldn’t be too far from your campus if I remember correctly.”

Jamie, surprised, took the piece of paper from Dr. Leon and looked at him, confused.

“You. . .aren’t going to tell my parents?”

Dr. Leon smiled.

“You are well past 18, Jamie.” he said good-naturedly. “Whatever is said between you and me is between the two of us.  If I believed that you were still a danger to yourself or others that would be different; but I don’t think it is as bad as it was before.

“I am giving you this resource because you _have_ been a patient since you were born.  You may as well be a second son!  Your mother is very worried and as well she should be.  You could have died last night, Jamie.  You must have one helluva Guardian Angel on your shoulder.”

This caused Jamie to smile a little.

“I think I do, too.” he murmured.

He looked at the doctor’s address strangely.

“This doctor. . .you say you know him personally?”

Dr. Leon nodded.

“I should.  I only dated his sister for most of my inundated life.”

Jamie was startled.

“This is _him_!?”

Dr. Leon laughed.

“Well, he paced himself and didn’t put too much emphasis on racing to the end of the course.” he answered. “Joshua is as committed to his patients as I am.  If you mention I referred you he will get you on his schedule without a fuss.”

Jamie looked thoughtful before looking up at the doctor gratefully.

“Thank you.” he said earnestly. “I think I will call him when Spring Semester starts.  I haven’t felt right on campus since I got there.”

Dr. Leon nodded.

“Post Traumatic Stress Disorder can go for years unchecked if one doesn’t recognise the symptoms early.” he agreed. “Joshua specialises in that kind of trauma treatment.  Whatever happened, Jamie, there are those of us that want to help.

“Joshua is not the type of doctor to just prescribe you something and shove you out his door, either.  He’s seen plenty of his mentors do that so he’s come to build a rapport among the medical community for _real_ therapy.”

Jamie smiled and nodded.

“Good.”

“In the interim, I want you to take the medicines I prescribed _exactly_ as I have prescribed them.” Dr. Leon said, standing up. “I have sent in a mild sedative to help you get to sleep at night until your sleep cycle resets.

“I would advise you continue it until you see Joshua at his practise.  He may change it at that time, but I want you to be _sleeping_ until he sees you.  In this case I am just the band-aid.  He is going to be your best resource to get over the hurt that this event has caused, Jamie.”

Jamie smiled again.

“I appreciate your help.” he answered. “I understand the rules.”

Dr. Leon grinned and clapped Jamie on his shoulder.

“Good boy, lad.” he agreed.  “I think I’ve held you up long enough.  I’ll have a quick word with your mother so she does not antagonise you at home about this discussion and I’ll get you on your way.”

“Thank you, doctor.”

Jamie followed Dr. Leon back to the hallway where Mrs. Bennett and Sophie were sitting.  Mrs. Bennett stood up and Dr. Leon pulled her aside when Jamie collapsed into the chair beside Sophie.

Sophie looked through her bangs at him with a grin.

“Sooooo?” she asked deviously. “Was it worth falling in the pond?”

Jamie smiled and nodded slowly.

“Totally worth it.” he admitted.

He looked at his sister and put his hand over hers.

“Thank you, Sophie.” he breathed. “I don’t think I would have made it without your help.”

Sophie waved her hand dismissively.

“You are the token sweetheart, Jamie.” she said, grinning wider. “Besides, I don’t need thanks. You are my brother! I love you.  I knew you were full of shit anyway.”

Jamie smiled and leaned his head against hers wearily.

They remained this way until Mrs. Bennett came back over to them and herded them to their feet. She got them back into the car and into the house.  By the time they were forced back to bed, they were safely in the care of their respective Guardians.


	22. And Some Dry White Toast, Ma'am

“No, Mom. . .I don’t want to eat.”

“Sophie, you cannot take this medicine on an empty stomach.”

“I am not hungry!”

“It’s tea and toast!  You just have to take a couple of bites!”

“MooooOOOOM!”

Sophie was still curled up in her bed after her mother had left her medication and her dinner snack on her bedside table.  Mrs. Bennett had given up arguing with her about forcing her to eat anything, but she would not give Sophie her pain medication unless she ate.  It was dangerous to take on an empty stomach.

Covers shifted when a pale arm yanked them up over a head with tousled blonde hair tangled over the pillow.  Her head hurt, she was hot and cold and she felt awful.  She’d taken plenty of pain killers on an empty stomach.  This was torture.

Bunny had returned to the Warren when he sensed something was amiss.  She’d worried for a moment until she realised it had been an excuse to go _back_ to the Warren for something.  Bunny was too embarrassed to tell her he just needed to go home for a minute.  She found that endearing.

She didn’t blame him.  She wouldn’t want to be around her either. She’d been coughing, wheezing and sneezing all day.  Her mother had started her humidifier that morning, but it was doing little for the swollen sinuses and aching throat.

She moaned.

Why wouldn’t her mother just let her have her meds like she let _Jamie_ have _his_ medications?

“I see we aren’t a fan of black tea and dry toast.”

Sophie peeked over the edge of the blankets and looked at Bunny wearily.  She moaned in response and ducked back under them again.

“Please don’t start.” she whispered.  “My stomach feels like it is going to jump out of my throat with everything else inside of it.”

Bunny smiled sympathetically and looked at the watered down tea mug and cold toast.  He shook his head and moved it aside.  He set a rather large, terra cotta bowl filled with an aromatic, orange soup in it down beside it.  Instead of the tea, there was a terra cotta mug of what looked like warm milk.

“Come on, Easter Lily.” he murmured gently. “You might feel better about what _I’ve_ brought instead.”

Sophie, having smelled something entirely different than what her mother had tried to force feed her, lifted her head and let the covers fall off of her shoulder.  Her face was a bright pink and her eyes were glassy.  She was wearing a tank top with small rhinestones forming a star pattern on the front.

She looked at Bunny curiously when she saw the bowl and the mug.

“What _you_ brought?”

“What do you think I’ve been doing in the Warren?” Bunny asked back.  “There’s a reason I grow vegetables, Sophie.”

“You can _cook_!?”

Bunny laughed now.

“If I hadn’t learned I would have starved.” he answered as Sophie sat up and tried to untangle her hair. “I have gotten better with little to do.”

Sophie wrapped a rubber band around her hair and pulled it into a pony tail.  She looked at the intricately painted dishes with greater interest.

“So, I am guessing you make your own dishes, too, huh?”

“I make do.” Bunny answered.

“Make do?” Sophie mocked. “You should start leaving _these_ for Easter.  You’d have parents believing in you again.”

Bunny smiled.

“Now you’re just flattering me.”

“I don’t tend to stroke your ego, Aster.” Sophie said smugly. “You have a rather large opinion of yourself already.”

Bunny laughed again.

“Do you want what I brought or should I eat it?”

“What is it?” Sophie asked. “It does. . .smell good. . .better than the crap Mom brought up here.”

“It is pumpkin and carrot soup.” Bunny answered. “I make it when I am not feeling well.  Pumpkin is good for swelling and inflammation.  It will make your throat feel better and help your body fight the infection.  Unfortunately, it usually tastes awful.  I use the carrots to offset the taste.”

“You sound like someone out of one of my Home Ec classes.” Sophie answered watching Bunny lift the bowl in his hand.

“Just try it, love.” Bunny coerced. “Have I ever steered you wrong before?”

Sophie sighed and shook her head.

“Then try.”

Sophie obliged the Guardian and took a sip from the spoon he held out to her carefully.  She was surprised when the sweet and spicy taste hit her tongue.  She felt her nasal passages loosen a bit when the smell of cinnamon and something else very aromatic wafted up to her.  She looked up at Bunny and nodded.

“That’s pretty good!”

Bunny smiled.

“See?  I told you.”

“May I?”

Sophie took the bowl and spoon from the Guardian and slowly began eating.  She was pleased that her stomach wasn’t upset by it.  She hadn’t been able to eat anything remotely delicious in a couple of days.  This was a welcome treat.

Bunny sat down in Sophie’s desk chair and observed.  It had been a very long time since he’d had the privilege to cook for anyone else.  Every once and awhile he’d humour another Guardian or spirit passing through the Warren, but it was seldom.  Since his reputation for being aloof was well known, most steered clear of him.

To be able to share his love of cooking what he’d grown himself was making him feel better than he had in ages.  He smiled when Sophie got about halfway through the bowl before stopping and looking at him happily.

“That was wonderful!” she said, smiling. “I don’t feel sick after eating it either!”

“That’s good.” Bunny answered taking the bowl and setting it down.  “Here. _I_ wouldn’t even drink the tea your Mum made you.”

Sophie laughed and took the mug Bunny handed her.

“What’s this?”

“Warm milk and honey.” Bunny answered.  “I learned from another spirit that passed through the Warren years ago that it was a wonderful concoction that eased the mind, the body and the spirit.  The milk will make you sleepy and the honey will help you fight the sore throat.”

“You are nothing but helpful, Aster.” Sophie said sweetly.

She took a sip from the mug first and enjoyed the almost too sweet taste of the milk.  She recognised the honey immediately.  This was Bunny’s own.  He’d been keeping beehives for the last decade.  He was getting pretty good at managing them obviously.

Bunny watched Sophie until the entire mug was emptied.  He smiled again when she looked at the bottom of the mug and turned it over in her hands.

“If I would have known you enjoyed it that much, I would have brought you more.”

“It isn’t just that.” Sophie murmured happily. “It’s just. . .I’ve never really seen you paint anything but eggs, so this is really nice to look at.”

Bunny was startled.

He watched Sophie’s wonder when she dragged a short fingernail over the intricate designs painted on the clay.  He could see how fascinated she was with every detail and shape. He looked down for a moment before meeting her eyes again.

“Do you. . .really think it is that nice?” he asked softly.

Sophie smiled brighter.

“Of course I do, Aster.” she answered truthfully. “This is beautiful.  My friends’ mothers spend more on dishes that don’t look half as pretty.”

Bunny blushed when Sophie shrugged happily and set the mug on her nightstand.  He looked at the uneaten plate of toast carefully before picking up the first slice and picking up the remainder of the soup in Sophie’s bowl.

Sophie started.

“You are going to eat _my_ food!?”

“Your mother has to think you ate _something_ she made, doesn’t she?” Bunny asked humourously. “I know _you_ won’t eat it.”

“Oh, but you will?”

Sophie stopped when Bunny leaned forward and looked her in the eye.

“If it gets you the medicine that makes you feel better, then yes.”

Sophie did not say anything else after Bunny kissed her forehead and leaned back in the chair.  She remained silent and watched the Guardian swirl the dried out toast in the soup before taking a bite out of it.  She smiled a little and put her head on her knees.

Bunny tolerated this quiet scrutiny for about two minutes before pausing and looking at her curiously.

“Is something wrong, Easter Lily?”

Sophie shook her head.

“No.”

Bunny waited for a moment before making a noise in his throat and finishing the first piece of toast.  He moved to the second and continued eating.  He remained aware of Sophie’s eyes and smile the entire time.  By the time he’d cleared the bowl and set it back on the nightstand, Sophie was practically grinning.

“All right.  That smile usually only means trouble.  What’s so funny?” he asked again.

“It’s really nothing, Aster.” Sophie answered. “I was just enjoying watching you eat.  Haven’t you ever just enjoyed watching someone doing something mundane like eating?”

Bunny thought about it for a moment and shook his head.

“Even when I had the option, I do not think I ever did.” he mused. “I suppose when you are given a task you focus solely on it.  You do not pause to appreciate those small moments.”

He looked at her and smiled faintly.

“But that is why I love you, Easter Lily.” he added. “You _do_ pay attention to those details. In doing so, you’ve taught me to appreciate them a little more, too.”

Sophie winked and nodded.

“Stick around a little longer and I may just surprise you.”

Bunny smiled again.

“Of that I have no doubt.”

“Sophie!  I am coming up with your medication!  Have you eaten?”

Sophie sighed wearily when her mother called up the stairs.  Bunny encouraged her to answer.

“Yes, Mom!” she called back.

She turned back when Bunny picked up his dishes and pushed Sophie’s mother’s back toward her.

“Where do you think you’re going!?”

“Jack informed me that while I am in this form your parents can see me.” Bunny advised softly. “I used to be able to maintain my invisibility at all times, but while your brother has Moon’s Mark, I cannot take the chance until I’ve relearned the spell to do it properly.

“I’ll be right back, love.  I’m under the same, strict orders as Jack.”

Sophie smiled and shook her head when Bunny tapped his heel on the floor of her room twice.

“Okay.” she said softly. “But you better start brushin’ up.”

Bunny grinned at her before disappearing.  In his place, a bright spring flower bloomed.

Sophie quickly got out of bed and plucked it from her floor before her mother made it to the top of the stairs. She scrambled back to the covers and dropped it into a growing collection that was sitting in a vase on the other side of her bed.  At least her mother may understand why she always had flowers all the time now that she knew about Bunny.

Mrs. Bennett opened the door and was surprised to find the plate empty on Sophie’s nightstand.

“Did you change your mind?”

Sophie grimaced.

“I want my medicine.” she said sourly.

Her mother smiled sympathetically and gave her a couple of the pain pills the doctor had prescribed.  She made sure Sophie took them before kissing her daughter and saying good night.

Sophie hoped that Bunny would come back, but her room remained quiet.  She frowned and sighed.

She figured he’d want to wash the dishes she’d used.  If she thought about it logickally, that made sense.  She was a walking germ factory.

The medication started working within the next five to ten minutes.  Despite her best efforts, Sophie felt her eyes getting heavy.  She curled up on her side and buried herself in her covers. He wouldn’t be long.  She knew that.

Sophie was still fast asleep by the time Bunny returned.  The Guardian was silent when he slowly sat down in the chair beside her bed.  It had gotten later than he had intended.  He hadn’t realised he was debating with himself for that long.

The clock beside Sophie was reflecting the time at 3AM.

Bunny frowned and looked down.

He didn’t know why he went in search of it.  He hadn’t pulled it out of its hiding place in a very long time.  Ever since he’d lost his first love, he didn’t want to dwell on what he couldn’t have. He was surprised he’d kept it at all.

He winced.

That was another lie.

The Guardian slowly opened his left hand and looked at the small object sitting in his palm.  He held it out in the dim light so he could see it.  The colours of spring flowers cast from silver were wrapped around a thin, narrow band. Flecks of gold were visible and twinkled in the light. In the center of a tiny Easter Lily that adorned the center of the ring was a small diamond.

Sandy had helped him with that.  North had helped him with the intricate carving.  Tooth had even pitched in when the gem wouldn’t stay mounted.  She’d had so much practise with setting teeth and making sure they didn’t go anywhere that she had made it look easy.

The colouring and design had been all his.  The spell it was enchanted with was also his.

Bunny thought back to when he’d given it to Rebecca.  It had been a long time since he’d thought of her name.  She loved that name.  She wouldn’t go by any other, including the one her parents had given her.

Her smile and her laughter were still present in his memory, but the image of her was faded and lost.  He could only catch her in flashes and pieces.  It made him feel terrible.  It made him feel as though he’d purposefully forgotten her.

But he hadn’t.

He couldn’t.

While Bunny was lost in thought, he hadn’t noticed that the diamond set in the ring had started to shine on its own.  The colours slowly began to get brighter and lit up as if coming alive after a long sleep.  A sigh echoed through the room and the Easter Lily in the center of the ring seemed to open a little wider.

_Are you still lamenting what you couldn’t change, Aster?_


End file.
